1
00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:03,003
♪ Hey, hey ♪

2
00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:06,047
♪ Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah ♪

3
00:00:06,047 --> 00:00:08,299
♪ Hey, hey ♪
♪ What they talkin' 'bout nut ♪

4
00:00:08,299 --> 00:00:09,342
♪ Hey, hey ♪

5
00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:10,635
♪ Yeah ♪

6
00:00:10,635 --> 00:00:12,721
♪ Hey ♪

7
00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:15,348
♪ Well I goes the hardest,
I roll the hardest ♪

8
00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:16,516
- I like that. I like that.

9
00:00:16,516 --> 00:00:19,310
♪ Somebody hatin' on me ♪

10
00:00:19,310 --> 00:00:21,771
♪ I smoke too much and I drink too much ♪

11
00:00:21,771 --> 00:00:24,274
♪ I can hear ya but it's
how you sound to me ♪

12
00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:26,735
♪ Like a whole lotta
nama, nama, noma, nama ♪

13
00:00:26,735 --> 00:00:29,529
♪ Nama, nama, noma,
nama, nama, nama, noma ♪

14
00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:31,448
♪ Blaming me ♪
♪ What is you sayin' nigga ♪

15
00:00:31,448 --> 00:00:34,117
♪ Nama, nama, noma,
nama, nama, nama, noma ♪

16
00:00:34,117 --> 00:00:35,618
- This a demo, huh?

17
00:00:35,618 --> 00:00:39,330
- Well, sort of, not really.
Just like a glorified demo.

18
00:00:39,330 --> 00:00:42,083
- Like the guitars in there, man.

19
00:00:42,959 --> 00:00:45,336
- We ain't got no guitars in there.

20
00:00:45,336 --> 00:00:47,464
- I like the guitars nonetheless.

21
00:00:47,464 --> 00:00:50,050
So like I was saying, man,
this hustling out here

22
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:51,509
is just to get money up,

23
00:00:51,509 --> 00:00:53,636
so we get into the studio
and do it official.

24
00:00:53,636 --> 00:00:55,555
You take it from the
street into the offices.

25
00:00:55,555 --> 00:00:57,515
You understand? It's the same hustle.

26
00:00:57,515 --> 00:01:01,269
Then you make it all
legit, like Sug Knight.

27
00:01:01,269 --> 00:01:02,771
Y'all called The Shit?

28
00:01:02,771 --> 00:01:04,189
- Yeah, The Shit.

29
00:01:06,524 --> 00:01:08,860
- Married to that name, man?

30
00:01:10,361 --> 00:01:12,113
You want people negatively
thinking about you

31
00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:14,449
like poops and farts?

32
00:01:14,449 --> 00:01:18,870
Be focusing on your dope-ass
tracks. You know what I mean?

33
00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:21,289
(bright music)

34
00:01:21,289 --> 00:01:25,126
♪ Color me and know the truth ♪

35
00:01:28,004 --> 00:01:30,924
- That's why I don't eat shellfish.

36
00:01:32,383 --> 00:01:34,761
Or any kind of dairy always
makes my stomach kinda,

37
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:35,553
you know.

38
00:01:35,553 --> 00:01:38,807
- Hey, yo, Glasses. What you need, man?

39
00:01:39,682 --> 00:01:40,600
- Bottle of wine.

40
00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:42,685
- Look like an X type.
You need some X, man?

41
00:01:42,685 --> 00:01:43,520
- X what?

42
00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:47,273
- You're a funny ass. All right, man.

43
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:50,777
- I, I'll have some change on the way out.

44
00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:56,116
(Larenz and Half-a-Cup laugh)

45
00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:57,867
- You see the ass on that bitch?

46
00:01:57,867 --> 00:02:00,620
Just straight down like
a cliff, it's a drop off.

47
00:02:00,620 --> 00:02:04,833
Ass ain't good for
nothing but taking a shit.

48
00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:08,795
- Mm, all the bitches in
my class ass like that.

49
00:02:09,712 --> 00:02:11,381
- That guy's gonna get in trouble.

50
00:02:11,381 --> 00:02:13,007
- Well, you should tell him that.

51
00:02:13,007 --> 00:02:14,509
- Yeah?
- Rehabilitate him.

52
00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:17,554
- Should I sit him down
on the curb, read to him?

53
00:02:17,554 --> 00:02:18,471
Maybe something from the Torah?

54
00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:19,305
- Yes.

55
00:02:19,305 --> 00:02:21,975
And then, you know, he can
grow two little dreadlocks and-

56
00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:23,143
- What kind of wine are we getting?

57
00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:23,977
Are we getting white or red?

58
00:02:23,977 --> 00:02:24,894
- I don't know.
- I don't know what you get

59
00:02:24,894 --> 00:02:25,937
for this sorta thing.
- I have no idea.

60
00:02:25,937 --> 00:02:27,772
- Do you get, um, what's that, um,

61
00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:29,649
that pink stuff that your
brothers always drink?

62
00:02:29,649 --> 00:02:31,776
- I don't know. Just get whatever.

63
00:02:31,776 --> 00:02:33,236
Just know that it takes
like two hours to get there.

64
00:02:33,236 --> 00:02:34,737
- I know exactly how long
it takes to get there

65
00:02:34,737 --> 00:02:36,948
because I MapQuested it, and
I had to write it by hand

66
00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:38,366
because you didn't get
any ink for the printer

67
00:02:38,366 --> 00:02:39,200
like you said you would.

68
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:40,451
- I was getting ready.

69
00:02:40,451 --> 00:02:42,453
- I asked you on Monday.

70
00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:46,916
Getting ready for a week.

71
00:02:46,916 --> 00:02:49,627
- Oh my god, get this one.
It has a beaver on it.

72
00:02:49,627 --> 00:02:51,087
- That's cute. That's really classy.

73
00:02:51,087 --> 00:02:52,130
- Classy? Are you joking?

74
00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:53,673
We're going to an orgy, Alan.

75
00:02:53,673 --> 00:02:56,134
The beaver has to be like
the orgy mascot animal.

76
00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:57,635
It's so perfect.

77
00:02:57,635 --> 00:02:58,887
- Can you stop saying that word?

78
00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:00,013
- What word?
- Orgy.

79
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:02,515
Stop. We're in a liquor store.

80
00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:09,105
- Okay. Well then, what kind
of wine goes with penises?

81
00:03:09,105 --> 00:03:10,356
Penises are meat, right?
- Yes.

82
00:03:10,356 --> 00:03:14,360
- So I guess that means we
need red, so red is the answer.

83
00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:15,361
- Well, it's all white meat,

84
00:03:15,361 --> 00:03:18,072
so get whatever goes best with chicken.

85
00:03:18,072 --> 00:03:21,451
- You're making this so sexy, Alan.

86
00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:23,328
I'm really glad that sign is there

87
00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,455
because I'm just fucking
dripping all over the place.

88
00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:26,497
- That's really gross.

89
00:03:26,497 --> 00:03:28,166
- Just dripping wet, totally wet.

90
00:03:28,166 --> 00:03:30,501
- I'm just going to be polite, you know.

91
00:03:30,501 --> 00:03:35,506
I mean they're (sighs)
they're your friends.

92
00:03:35,632 --> 00:03:36,466
- Hello?

93
00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:44,432
Hello.

94
00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:46,100
- I'm over, I'm over here, babe.

95
00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:49,270
- Really? You're on the couch.

96
00:03:49,270 --> 00:03:53,942
You know what? That was the
last place I was gonna look.

97
00:03:58,613 --> 00:04:02,033
- Baby, I'm resting up for our big night.

98
00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:09,415
Kittles and I missed you all day.

99
00:04:09,415 --> 00:04:11,501
He was just asking about
you. You know that?

100
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,670
It was his first words
ever. It was adorable.

101
00:04:13,670 --> 00:04:18,675
He said, "When's Rachel coming
home? Meow, meow, meow."

102
00:04:18,800 --> 00:04:21,552
- Aw, how cute. Kittles is a dog.

103
00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:26,808
You starting early today?

104
00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:30,061
- I had a nightcap before my nap. What?

105
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:33,940
Okay, I had two. I had two.

106
00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:36,734
It was because I was
watching a "Law and Order"

107
00:04:36,734 --> 00:04:37,944
that gave me some anxiety.

108
00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:39,320
You know how I don't like it

109
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:41,447
when the bad guys get
off on a technicality.

110
00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:43,491
That's what happened. I had anxiety.

111
00:04:43,491 --> 00:04:45,326
- What happened to your rule? What was it?

112
00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:48,204
Um, no drinks before sundown?

113
00:04:48,204 --> 00:04:49,998
- No drinks before, no drinks before,

114
00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:51,499
I don't wanna drink ever again.

115
00:04:51,499 --> 00:04:53,293
Two weeks ago I told you I was quitting.

116
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:58,298
And then a week ago you told
me we're going to an orgy.

117
00:04:58,589 --> 00:05:00,383
So how am I gonna quit drinking

118
00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:01,801
when you're telling me
we're going to an orgy

119
00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,469
where I'm gonna be naked
in front of other men?

120
00:05:03,469 --> 00:05:06,973
That's a situation that requires alcohol.

121
00:05:06,973 --> 00:05:10,101
- Gordon, everything
you do requires alcohol.

122
00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:12,937
Nightcaps before naps.
Four martini movies.

123
00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:13,938
Oh, what else you got?

124
00:05:13,938 --> 00:05:18,943
You got, um, Drunk Wednesdays,
and the beer in the shower?

125
00:05:19,235 --> 00:05:21,487
I'm going to read the list.

126
00:05:24,115 --> 00:05:25,658
Here we go. Okay.

127
00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:29,162
"Reasons to Quit Drinking,"
by Gordon and Rachel.

128
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:31,164
- Mostly Rachel.

129
00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:34,834
- Hangovers, inevitable liver failure,

130
00:05:34,834 --> 00:05:38,254
bloat, fatigue, paranoia, disenchantment.

131
00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:42,508
Yellow skin. You have it.

132
00:05:42,508 --> 00:05:44,844
Red nose, bad breath.

133
00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:46,012
- My breath is amazing.

134
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:48,348
- The shakes, gooey eyes,

135
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,558
prone to drunk driving, slurred speech.

136
00:05:50,558 --> 00:05:52,894
- Oh, baby, keep going.
You're turning me on.

137
00:05:52,894 --> 00:05:53,895
- Impotence.

138
00:05:55,188 --> 00:05:56,981
- Oh my god, look at this one.

139
00:05:56,981 --> 00:05:59,317
It's so cute. The platypus.

140
00:05:59,317 --> 00:06:00,401
- You are killing me. Do you know that?

141
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:01,402
You are honestly killing me.

142
00:06:01,402 --> 00:06:02,737
- And you're sealing my vagina shut.

143
00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:03,571
- Well, you don't like it,

144
00:06:03,571 --> 00:06:05,865
you can go wait outside with
Heavy D and Little Wayne

145
00:06:05,865 --> 00:06:07,575
and help them sell the coke and the smoke.

146
00:06:07,575 --> 00:06:08,743
- And the X.

147
00:06:08,743 --> 00:06:10,787
- Yes, and since you're so
intent on fucking your friends,

148
00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:11,913
maybe they can act as a pimp.

149
00:06:11,913 --> 00:06:12,830
You can use the gas money-

150
00:06:12,830 --> 00:06:14,082
- Oh my god.
- To put into my car

151
00:06:14,082 --> 00:06:15,375
that we're using to drive to the country

152
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:18,044
to fuck your friends with the
directions that I hand wrote.

153
00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:19,545
Did you know that the platypus

154
00:06:19,545 --> 00:06:22,006
is the only mammal that lays eggs?

155
00:06:22,006 --> 00:06:23,257
- No, I didn't.

156
00:06:23,257 --> 00:06:26,969
- Well also, it has a spur on
its ankle that shoots venom.

157
00:06:26,969 --> 00:06:27,804
- Huh.

158
00:06:27,804 --> 00:06:31,307
- It's not deadly to man,
but it's very painful.

159
00:06:31,307 --> 00:06:33,101
Think about it.

160
00:06:33,101 --> 00:06:34,602
- I don't, I don't know
what I'm thinking about.

161
00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:37,355
- Okay, we'll get this. Good job.

162
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,072
- Mm, Gordon.

163
00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:49,492
Oh, I have something for you. One second.

164
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:51,828
Okay, you are gonna love it.

165
00:06:53,204 --> 00:06:55,206
I got you a new outfit for the party.

166
00:06:55,206 --> 00:06:58,709
- Oh. Well, what's,
what's wrong with this?

167
00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:01,671
Look at this. Come on, I
waltz in wearing my boxers.

168
00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:05,842
That shows everybody I am
there to take care of business.

169
00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:07,718
- Okay, I can see where
you're going with that.

170
00:07:07,718 --> 00:07:10,638
But this is kind of like a, a nice,

171
00:07:11,681 --> 00:07:13,641
you know, wrapping paper.

172
00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:15,560
Look, pants too.

173
00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:17,812
And then me and the
girls will rip you open

174
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:19,939
like it's Christmas morning.

175
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:23,359
- Okay, except I'm Jewish, so
I don't know what that means.

176
00:07:23,359 --> 00:07:24,861
I know that you could tear it off me

177
00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:27,029
like it's, like, the
third day of Hanukkah.

178
00:07:27,029 --> 00:07:29,282
Or you could, maybe you
could spin me like a dreidel.

179
00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,826
Or you could break me open
like a piece of matzo.

180
00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:34,662
Or you could find me like the afikoman.

181
00:07:34,662 --> 00:07:36,539
- Or I'm gonna go make you some coffee

182
00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:38,916
and you are gonna take a shower.

183
00:07:38,916 --> 00:07:40,918
- I didn't say I was gonna take a shower.

184
00:07:40,918 --> 00:07:41,919
Do I need to take a shower?

185
00:07:41,919 --> 00:07:45,465
I (sniffs) I'll take,
yeah, I'll take a shower.

186
00:07:45,465 --> 00:07:46,716
I'll take a shower.

187
00:07:46,716 --> 00:07:48,843
By the way, I thought of
something else for your list.

188
00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:50,303
- Oh, what's that, babe?

189
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:51,137
- The shits.

190
00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:53,723
I haven't had a solid bowel
movement in about a decade.

191
00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:54,932
- [Rachel] That's a good one, babe.

192
00:07:54,932 --> 00:07:58,394
- I told you not to laminate that list.

193
00:07:58,394 --> 00:08:00,313
- [Alan] Maybe just get a cork screw.

194
00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,147
- Why?

195
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:02,023
- Because they might not have
a corkscrew at the farm house.

196
00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:03,024
- Who doesn't have a cork screw?

197
00:08:03,024 --> 00:08:03,858
- Farmers don't have one.

198
00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:05,276
- Okay, fine. Hold on.

199
00:08:05,276 --> 00:08:06,819
(phone ringing)

200
00:08:06,819 --> 00:08:08,446
Hey, sweetie. What's up?

201
00:08:08,446 --> 00:08:10,239
- I'm just making coffee for Gordon.

202
00:08:10,239 --> 00:08:12,283
He was a little hiccupy when I got home.

203
00:08:12,283 --> 00:08:13,367
- Oh, I'm shocked.

204
00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:14,869
- How's Alan acting?

205
00:08:14,869 --> 00:08:17,622
- Uh, imagine Woody Allen
with a gerbil in his ass.

206
00:08:17,622 --> 00:08:20,666
- (laughs) He's so funny.

207
00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:21,501
- I don't know about that.

208
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,294
- Who, who's that? Is that Rachel?

209
00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:24,170
- Honey, please-
- Is that Rachel?

210
00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,004
Tell her hi.
- Hold on a second.

211
00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:25,963
Can you hold on?

212
00:08:25,963 --> 00:08:29,217
Uh, so anyway, we went
and got some nice vino,

213
00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:32,386
and then we're, uh, gonna
be headed over there.

214
00:08:32,386 --> 00:08:34,347
Are you guys leaving soon?

215
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:38,142
- Yeah, we're gonna leave once
Gordon gets outta the shower.

216
00:08:38,142 --> 00:08:39,560
(Gordon moans softly)

217
00:08:39,560 --> 00:08:41,312
- Okay. Well, I guess I'll
see you over there then.

218
00:08:41,312 --> 00:08:43,648
Um, this is weird, but good.

219
00:08:44,899 --> 00:08:48,027
- Yeah, exactly. It's
weird, but it's, it's good.

220
00:08:48,027 --> 00:08:49,195
It'll be good.

221
00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:53,449
I'm still so surprised that Alan agreed.

222
00:08:53,449 --> 00:08:54,534
I mean, it seems so unlike him.

223
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:55,368
- I know, tell me about it.

224
00:08:55,368 --> 00:08:56,202
- Can we go now?

225
00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:57,036
- Can you hold on?

226
00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,079
- It's a portable phone!

227
00:08:58,079 --> 00:08:59,288
- Ugh, you know what? I, I gotta go.

228
00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:01,791
Alan's afraid of Black people.

229
00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:06,254
- I'm not afraid of Black people.

230
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:08,548
Just, just that Black person.

231
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:11,884
- What the hell's that geek pointing at?

232
00:09:14,303 --> 00:09:17,723
(disjointed piano music)

233
00:09:21,394 --> 00:09:25,273
(disjointed piano music continues)

234
00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:26,857
- What time is it?

235
00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:29,443
(lively music)

236
00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:34,240
- You know, I need you to be navigating.

237
00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:36,200
- I can't read your handwriting.

238
00:09:36,200 --> 00:09:37,410
- So who all is gonna be there?

239
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:39,370
It's gonna be Rachel, right?

240
00:09:39,370 --> 00:09:42,790
- No, she got crabs and
it spread to her brain,

241
00:09:42,790 --> 00:09:45,209
so she had to cancel.

242
00:09:45,209 --> 00:09:49,213
Yes, she's coming. And she's
fucking bringing Gordon.

243
00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:50,131
- I don't like Gordon.

244
00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:52,675
Why can't he just have
a drink, two drinks,

245
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:55,136
get a buzz, and stop?

246
00:09:55,136 --> 00:09:57,305
I can do that. It's called discipline.

247
00:09:57,305 --> 00:09:59,015
I bet he's drunk before
he even gets there-

248
00:09:59,015 --> 00:10:01,017
- Obviously.
- And he shows up wasted.

249
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:03,769
(Gordon retches)

250
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:10,026
(Gordon spits)

251
00:10:11,902 --> 00:10:14,655
(Gordon retches)

252
00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:18,618
(birds chirping)

253
00:10:24,415 --> 00:10:27,126
(Gordon sighs)

254
00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:28,377
- Thanks, babe.

255
00:10:30,129 --> 00:10:33,883
This is the kind that
always makes me sneeze.

256
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,891
(car door thuds)

257
00:10:41,891 --> 00:10:43,476
I was vomiting out there.

258
00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:45,728
- I know. I could hear you.

259
00:10:47,271 --> 00:10:49,357
And I could smell it.

260
00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:52,151
- I must've have gotten
seasick in the shower.

261
00:10:52,151 --> 00:10:53,944
- Well, did you get it all out?

262
00:10:53,944 --> 00:10:55,404
I really don't wanna be driving up there

263
00:10:55,404 --> 00:10:58,157
with you barfing out the window.

264
00:10:58,157 --> 00:11:01,410
- Yeah, it's all out. This was a good one.

265
00:11:01,410 --> 00:11:05,748
Really cleared the deck.
Hit reset on the old liver.

266
00:11:07,416 --> 00:11:08,668
What's the matter, your
friends can't handle

267
00:11:08,668 --> 00:11:10,252
a little regurgitation?

268
00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:13,047
- I'm sure they can, but
why should they have to?

269
00:11:13,047 --> 00:11:16,342
- Because I'm like the fly
lately, baby. You know that.

270
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:19,220
Everything I eat, I just barf up.

271
00:11:19,220 --> 00:11:20,888
Everything except your pussy.

272
00:11:20,888 --> 00:11:21,722
- No.

273
00:11:21,722 --> 00:11:22,890
- I can hold that down.

274
00:11:22,890 --> 00:11:24,975
- Gordon, Gordon, Gordon.

275
00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:27,937
You stink.

276
00:11:33,275 --> 00:11:35,861
- What's the deal with Todd?
I can't figure that guy out.

277
00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:37,905
It bothers me when I
can't figure people out.

278
00:11:37,905 --> 00:11:41,534
He's like a, um, he's
like a mosquito or a-

279
00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:45,371
- Like a jaguar, or something like that.

280
00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:47,832
He's got like an animal magnetism.

281
00:11:47,832 --> 00:11:50,000
- He's like a Jaguar
with AIDS. He's gross.

282
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:51,502
- How is he gross?

283
00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:54,255
- You like that Pad Thai?

284
00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:57,383
- Yeah. It's very, um, very flavorful.

285
00:11:57,383 --> 00:11:59,427
- It's the cheeseburger of Thailand.

286
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:02,263
But you gotta wash it down good. (laughs)

287
00:12:02,263 --> 00:12:03,222
- Oh, god!

288
00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:06,642
(Todd laughs)
What are you doing?

289
00:12:06,642 --> 00:12:08,060
(Todd laughs)

290
00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:09,895
He says and does inappropriate things,

291
00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,647
and he does them just to
make me feel uncomfortable.

292
00:12:11,647 --> 00:12:13,399
- I'm sure he does it to
make you feel uncomfortable.

293
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:14,567
- Well, it works.

294
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:18,279
And honestly, it just
makes me feel bad for Tina

295
00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:19,530
because she's so clueless, you know?

296
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:20,948
- Oh, my god.
- What?

297
00:12:20,948 --> 00:12:23,409
- What the fuck? I mean, really.

298
00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:25,745
Do you always have to be Judge Alan?

299
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:26,954
Like, I mean, is there not a moment

300
00:12:26,954 --> 00:12:29,123
when you can just let
something be, let it exist?

301
00:12:29,123 --> 00:12:30,624
- I'm going, right? I'm driving.

302
00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:31,959
I'm driving eight miles
above the speed limit.

303
00:12:31,959 --> 00:12:33,419
- Oh.

304
00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:36,422
Look. We fuck like, what, once a month?

305
00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:37,256
- Give or take.

306
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:38,090
- And when we do,

307
00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:41,385
it's like we're recreating
past fucks or something,

308
00:12:41,385 --> 00:12:43,804
and except with no, anything.

309
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:48,392
That makes me really sad, Alan.

310
00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:53,272
So tonight, let's blow
the cobwebs off your dick.

311
00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:56,108
Let's see if we can get our groove back.

312
00:12:56,108 --> 00:12:56,942
- Groove?

313
00:12:56,942 --> 00:12:58,486
- Did you hear a word I said? Did you?

314
00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,196
- Yes, I'm listening to you.

315
00:13:00,196 --> 00:13:01,781
- [Yasmine] Groove.

316
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:03,866
- Groove.

317
00:13:03,866 --> 00:13:04,700
- Groove.

318
00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:05,534
- Got it.

319
00:13:09,205 --> 00:13:10,623
- I don't like Alan.

320
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:13,417
- How could you not like Alan?

321
00:13:13,417 --> 00:13:16,086
- He's whiny. He has bad vision.

322
00:13:17,046 --> 00:13:19,507
I bet he's one of those guys
where he takes his glasses off,

323
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,217
he looks like a completely
different person.

324
00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,760
You know those kind of people?

325
00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:26,347
My grandpa was like one of those
people, but with his teeth.

326
00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:27,431
He would take his teeth out,

327
00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:29,558
and you just see this
whole different face.

328
00:13:29,558 --> 00:13:30,935
Like he, he looked like
a Muppet or something.

329
00:13:30,935 --> 00:13:31,811
- Oh.

330
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,271
- I'm just warning you, this is for you.

331
00:13:34,271 --> 00:13:36,857
When it's go time, when
it's time to do this thing,

332
00:13:36,857 --> 00:13:37,817
you're gonna be shocked.

333
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,026
- Thank you, I, I, I-
- It's gonna be jarring.

334
00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:40,152
- I really appreciate that, sweetheart.

335
00:13:40,152 --> 00:13:42,196
- Thank you. It's gonna be jarring.

336
00:13:42,196 --> 00:13:43,280
It's gonna be jarring.

337
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:44,448
- I bet it is.

338
00:13:45,324 --> 00:13:46,367
- Yeah.

339
00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:51,330
♪ I know the rhythm and soul ♪

340
00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:55,000
♪ When you take the picture
and it falls in her lap ♪

341
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,294
♪ I now know ♪

342
00:13:57,294 --> 00:13:59,797
- Are you at all nervous about the fact

343
00:13:59,797 --> 00:14:02,424
that everyone is gonna get to see

344
00:14:02,424 --> 00:14:04,969
what only you've gotten to see?

345
00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:07,471
- What do I get to see?

346
00:14:07,471 --> 00:14:10,057
- My wonderment. My naked body.

347
00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:13,602
It's been yours and only
yours for two years.

348
00:14:13,602 --> 00:14:18,107
- Oh, it's gonna be hard,
but I can handle it.

349
00:14:18,107 --> 00:14:21,569
- I'm, I'm a little trepidatious.

350
00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:23,195
I'm trepidatious that Gordon and Todd

351
00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:26,323
will know what it's like to be with you,

352
00:14:26,323 --> 00:14:28,117
to feel you, you know?

353
00:14:28,117 --> 00:14:29,952
- I mean, people know.

354
00:14:32,538 --> 00:14:34,707
You know, I was hardly a
virgin when we started dating.

355
00:14:34,707 --> 00:14:36,584
- They're just gonna know private,

356
00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:38,252
personal things about you,

357
00:14:38,252 --> 00:14:39,086
just so you know.
- Like?

358
00:14:39,086 --> 00:14:41,088
- Like the big mole you
have next your butt.

359
00:14:41,088 --> 00:14:42,548
- Oh, my best feature?

360
00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:46,051
- Chocolate chip. That's
my chocolate chip.

361
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:50,598
♪ Egg and shoulder, your tank rollers ♪

362
00:14:50,598 --> 00:14:53,309
(window whirs)

363
00:14:53,309 --> 00:14:54,226
- I farted.

364
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:56,896
(window whirs)

365
00:14:56,896 --> 00:15:01,317
♪ Ooh the rhythm and soul ♪

366
00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:04,403
♪ Get your fingers moving their sockets ♪

367
00:15:04,403 --> 00:15:08,616
♪ Tune in Tokyo ♪

368
00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:11,994
♪ You're just the man ♪

369
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:15,247
♪ The one I saw in Kazan ♪

370
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:18,375
♪ One of us went for the throat ♪

371
00:15:18,375 --> 00:15:21,629
♪ Oh no, oh rhythm and ♪

372
00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:30,179
- Hey!
- Amigos.

373
00:15:30,179 --> 00:15:31,138
- Hey. How goes?

374
00:15:31,138 --> 00:15:33,724
- Tina, you look so beautiful. Oh.

375
00:15:33,724 --> 00:15:36,310
- Oh no, I was cleaning all day.

376
00:15:36,310 --> 00:15:37,686
- She was cleaning so much,
she almost forgot to clean

377
00:15:37,686 --> 00:15:39,897
the most important thing, herself.

378
00:15:39,897 --> 00:15:40,898
- [Yasmine] Oh.

379
00:15:40,898 --> 00:15:42,399
- I, I showered.

380
00:15:42,399 --> 00:15:43,442
- Me too.

381
00:15:43,442 --> 00:15:45,569
- It is so pretty out here.

382
00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:46,445
- It's nice.

383
00:15:46,445 --> 00:15:48,197
- Did you find it okay?

384
00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:49,615
- We're here, right? We made it.

385
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:50,866
- Yes, you are.

386
00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:54,620
- Is this place really
called Cummings Farm?

387
00:15:54,620 --> 00:15:56,497
- Oh, it's my grammy and granpy's place.

388
00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:57,331
- Oh.

389
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,332
- Oh, we were gonna call, uh,

390
00:15:58,332 --> 00:15:59,917
and, uh, ask you if you needed anything,

391
00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:02,378
but our phones kept just
dropping in and outta service.

392
00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:04,797
- Oh, there, there's a Walmart
just 20 minutes down the road

393
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,131
if you want.

394
00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:07,800
- It's like 25 minutes down the road.

395
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:08,676
- If you-
- It's like 30 minutes

396
00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:09,510
down the road.
- We could just, um,

397
00:16:09,510 --> 00:16:11,095
I could just grab my
bag and we can just go.

398
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:12,388
We can head into town.
- Yeah, yeah.

399
00:16:12,388 --> 00:16:13,597
- Baby, baby. No, we have everything-

400
00:16:13,597 --> 00:16:14,556
- Thanks.
- We have everything.

401
00:16:14,556 --> 00:16:15,641
No, we have everything we need here.

402
00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:17,142
No need to run off anywhere.

403
00:16:17,142 --> 00:16:19,937
- I thought she wanted to.

404
00:16:19,937 --> 00:16:21,105
- No.

405
00:16:21,105 --> 00:16:22,982
- Uh, where are the kids?

406
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:24,024
- Oh, they're inside.

407
00:16:24,024 --> 00:16:26,026
- Really? Really?

408
00:16:26,026 --> 00:16:27,361
- No, I'm kidding. Come here.

409
00:16:27,361 --> 00:16:29,113
(Yasmine laughs)

410
00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:29,947
Joke.

411
00:16:30,948 --> 00:16:33,450
- My, my grammy's watching
them at our house.

412
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:34,284
- Oh.

413
00:16:34,284 --> 00:16:37,329
- So, the kids.
- Okay. Mm-hmm.

414
00:16:37,329 --> 00:16:38,914
- Well, Todd wants me to make mojitos.

415
00:16:38,914 --> 00:16:40,916
- Oh, I love mojitos.
- Mojitos.

416
00:16:40,916 --> 00:16:44,670
- I don't know how. (laughs)

417
00:16:45,879 --> 00:16:47,006
- We brought some wine.

418
00:16:47,006 --> 00:16:48,048
- Yeah.
- And it's okay,

419
00:16:48,048 --> 00:16:49,425
'cause it's, it's pre-made.

420
00:16:49,425 --> 00:16:51,468
- Oh. It's what?

421
00:16:51,468 --> 00:16:53,053
- Nothing. Nothing.

422
00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:55,014
- Oh, okay.

423
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:57,141
I, I, I printed the
directions for the mojitos

424
00:16:57,141 --> 00:16:58,851
off the internet.

425
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,352
(all giggle nervously)

426
00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:01,937
- It shouldn't be that difficult.

427
00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,272
You should see some of the Mexicanos

428
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:06,191
that have made me mojitos,
they were retardos.

429
00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:07,735
No, with these two putting
their heads together

430
00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:10,154
making mojitos, it's gonna
be the best fucking mojito

431
00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:11,196
in all of Louisiana.

432
00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:12,906
- That's a tall order, Todd.

433
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:15,200
- Come here, you tall order.

434
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:16,493
- Hey, um-
- Crazy.

435
00:17:16,493 --> 00:17:17,786
- How's the, uh, the music biz going?

436
00:17:17,786 --> 00:17:19,329
- Oh, it's great. It's funky fresh.

437
00:17:19,329 --> 00:17:21,540
We just signed this new band
called The Future Babies.

438
00:17:21,540 --> 00:17:24,001
It's like this real sweet,
sexy, like bump and grind music.

439
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:25,335
- Yeah.
- It's awesome.

440
00:17:25,335 --> 00:17:26,336
I played it for Tina last night,

441
00:17:26,336 --> 00:17:28,797
and she was like, "Is this Anita Baker?"

442
00:17:28,797 --> 00:17:32,468
- They sounded like an old Black woman.

443
00:17:32,468 --> 00:17:33,886
- I like Anita Baker.

444
00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:36,055
- She's good, but they don't
sound like that at all.

445
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:37,931
- Did you see us on the trampoline?

446
00:17:37,931 --> 00:17:38,974
- Yes, we did.
- We did, yeah.

447
00:17:38,974 --> 00:17:39,892
- We did. You look great.

448
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,143
- It's hurting my balls.

449
00:17:41,143 --> 00:17:42,978
- I mean, how 'bout that?

450
00:17:42,978 --> 00:17:44,688
- When I was a little kid
and I was on a trampoline,

451
00:17:44,688 --> 00:17:46,190
I could just do all sorts of tricks on it

452
00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:47,107
and stuff like that.

453
00:17:47,107 --> 00:17:48,233
And just little tiny acorns

454
00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:49,860
would just stay sucked up in my body.

455
00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:52,071
But now, it's just like
I feel it in my stomach.

456
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:53,489
- Getting old so they dangle, right?

457
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,324
- Yeah, like a hooker's earrings.

458
00:17:55,324 --> 00:17:57,659
- Yeah. Are there any animals out here?

459
00:17:57,659 --> 00:17:59,036
- There's some ducks.

460
00:17:59,036 --> 00:18:01,830
And there was a goat, but it
got pregnant and ran away.

461
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:02,664
(Yasmine laughs)

462
00:18:02,664 --> 00:18:04,416
I got it pregnant and it ran away.

463
00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:07,211
- I'm gonna turn the car
off. I'll be right back.

464
00:18:07,211 --> 00:18:10,506
- Kidding about the goat. I
was kidding about my balls too.

465
00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:12,299
They don't dangle that bad.

466
00:18:12,299 --> 00:18:14,468
- Hey, they're your balls.

467
00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:17,513
- Not tonight, they aren't my balls.

468
00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:19,598
Let's look at these tiki.

469
00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:25,938
(insect buzzes)

470
00:18:25,938 --> 00:18:28,440
(Alan groans)

471
00:18:35,864 --> 00:18:37,282
- They look great, Todd.

472
00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:38,659
- Yeah, they turned out nice, didn't they?

473
00:18:38,659 --> 00:18:40,536
- They look fantastic.

474
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:41,370
- That's very nice.

475
00:18:41,370 --> 00:18:42,496
- This one's really cute.

476
00:18:42,496 --> 00:18:44,039
- You have a corkscrew?

477
00:18:44,039 --> 00:18:46,291
- Oh no, I don't think we do.

478
00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:49,586
My grandparents, they don't really drink.

479
00:18:49,586 --> 00:18:50,462
We could go get one.

480
00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:51,296
- Yeah.

481
00:18:51,296 --> 00:18:52,464
- Babe, no. No, no, no, no.

482
00:18:52,464 --> 00:18:53,507
It's all, it's all good.

483
00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:54,675
We'll figure it out. It's no big deal.

484
00:18:54,675 --> 00:18:56,343
- Just, well-
- We'll figure it out.

485
00:18:56,343 --> 00:18:57,136
- Okay.

486
00:18:57,136 --> 00:18:58,720
- You know what we're gonna have tomorrow?

487
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:01,140
Homemade waffles with
fresh-picked strawberries.

488
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,724
They grow wild here. They're awesome.

489
00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:03,767
You're gonna go crazy for them.

490
00:19:03,767 --> 00:19:05,060
- I don't think, I don't even
think we're gonna be here

491
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:06,061
for breakfast.

492
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:06,895
I don't think we'll be here for breakfast.

493
00:19:06,895 --> 00:19:07,771
- Of course you're gonna
be here tomorrow morning.

494
00:19:07,771 --> 00:19:09,106
What are you talking about?

495
00:19:09,106 --> 00:19:10,774
You're gonna go ape shit
for these strawberries.

496
00:19:10,774 --> 00:19:12,359
The kids picked them themselves.

497
00:19:12,359 --> 00:19:14,945
- Tiki. I like that word, tiki.

498
00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:16,780
- Tiki?
- Yeah, it's a good word.

499
00:19:16,780 --> 00:19:17,698
- Yeah, I got these off the internet.

500
00:19:17,698 --> 00:19:19,199
- I bet they have them at Walmart.

501
00:19:19,199 --> 00:19:21,493
- Tina loves Walmart today.
Doesn't she, you guys?

502
00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:24,246
- I do.
- Like a Walmart commercial.

503
00:19:24,246 --> 00:19:25,789
- They have everything.

504
00:19:25,789 --> 00:19:26,874
- It's a good place.

505
00:19:26,874 --> 00:19:27,708
- It's so convenient.

506
00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,960
I don't wanna be driving
around to 10 different stores-

507
00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:30,961
- Yeah. Totally.
- To get what I need.

508
00:19:30,961 --> 00:19:32,004
- They just have a lotta stuff.

509
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:33,922
- I can't drive around.
I've got two kids, you know.

510
00:19:33,922 --> 00:19:37,092
- Look who's here. Last but not least.

511
00:19:37,092 --> 00:19:39,178
Whoo! Whoo-hoo!

512
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,597
- Oh look, Alan, it's Rachel.

513
00:19:43,974 --> 00:19:45,392
- And Gordon.

514
00:19:45,392 --> 00:19:48,020
- Hey, Toddy. Looking sharp.
- Hey.

515
00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:50,105
Yeah, it's a special
occasion, special occasion.

516
00:19:50,105 --> 00:19:50,981
You find it all right?

517
00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:51,815
- Yeah, it was easy.

518
00:19:51,815 --> 00:19:53,275
I came here with Tina and the kids before.

519
00:19:53,275 --> 00:19:54,985
- Oh, that's right, the kids.

520
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,069
The kids are great, by the way.

521
00:19:56,069 --> 00:19:57,571
- Are they?
- Yeah.

522
00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:59,114
Hop out, let me look at
you. I wanna look at you.

523
00:19:59,114 --> 00:19:59,948
- Oh yeah.

524
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:05,704
- Is he sleeping?

525
00:20:06,580 --> 00:20:08,248
- I think he's dead.

526
00:20:09,541 --> 00:20:13,086
And this orgy just took
a necrophilic turn.

527
00:20:14,129 --> 00:20:15,255
It's when you fuck a dead body.

528
00:20:15,255 --> 00:20:16,757
- I get it.

529
00:20:16,757 --> 00:20:20,594
- Oh my, you look amazing.
Spin around for me.

530
00:20:21,803 --> 00:20:22,638
(Rachel laughs)

531
00:20:22,638 --> 00:20:25,641
Oh my god, you are the bell
of the ball. I'm serious.

532
00:20:25,641 --> 00:20:27,392
You're the prettiest girl here.

533
00:20:27,392 --> 00:20:28,727
- You're sweet.

534
00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:29,937
- Gordon looks all tuckered out.

535
00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:32,689
- Yeah, he's a little
daiquiri challenged right now.

536
00:20:32,689 --> 00:20:34,399
- Let me see your panties real quick.

537
00:20:34,399 --> 00:20:35,234
- What?

538
00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:36,109
- Just like a quick flash.

539
00:20:36,109 --> 00:20:36,944
- You're so bad.

540
00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:38,612
- Just a taste, please.

541
00:20:38,612 --> 00:20:39,446
- A little taste.

542
00:20:39,446 --> 00:20:40,405
- Of the hiney.

543
00:20:40,405 --> 00:20:42,366
- Of the hiney?
- Yeah.

544
00:20:42,366 --> 00:20:43,784
Boo-yah.
(Rachel laughs)

545
00:20:43,784 --> 00:20:45,786
That's what I'm talking about.

546
00:20:45,786 --> 00:20:47,287
Hey Gordon, you're alive.

547
00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:48,622
- Yeah, just arrived.
- Yeah.

548
00:20:48,622 --> 00:20:49,665
- Just arrived.

549
00:20:49,665 --> 00:20:53,001
- No honey, you're alive. (chuckles)

550
00:20:53,001 --> 00:20:54,878
You were asleep and now you're not.

551
00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:56,880
- Well, now I'm sleep walking.

552
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:58,757
- Rachel said you guys had a
couple daiquiris on the ways?

553
00:20:58,757 --> 00:20:59,675
- He drank mine.

554
00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:01,551
- We had a couple blended
daiquiris on the way up here.

555
00:21:01,551 --> 00:21:04,429
There's like a, like a, what was it?

556
00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:05,681
It was a drive-through daiquiri shop.

557
00:21:05,681 --> 00:21:07,015
It's right down the
road, you must know it.

558
00:21:07,015 --> 00:21:08,100
- Yeah, I drive by it all the time.

559
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,519
- Right. You must go there all the time.

560
00:21:10,519 --> 00:21:11,895
- You know, we have even
more drinks in the house

561
00:21:11,895 --> 00:21:12,896
if you want.

562
00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:16,775
- Okay, I mean, I'm
whatever. Yeah, I'm cool.

563
00:21:16,775 --> 00:21:17,943
If you're having a
drink, I'll have a drink.

564
00:21:17,943 --> 00:21:20,028
If not, I'll wait. It's cool with me.

565
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:20,862
Do you wanna get a drink?

566
00:21:20,862 --> 00:21:21,780
Let's get a drink. You wanna get one?

567
00:21:21,780 --> 00:21:23,573
- So Tina said you guys
are making mojitos.

568
00:21:23,573 --> 00:21:24,825
- Yeah. News travels fast.

569
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:26,576
- (coughs) Mojitos are for fags though.

570
00:21:26,576 --> 00:21:27,953
So what are we gonna drink?

571
00:21:27,953 --> 00:21:29,579
- Well, mojitos are on the menu, yeah.

572
00:21:29,579 --> 00:21:31,081
- Well, I want one.

573
00:21:31,081 --> 00:21:32,291
- Okay. What are we having?
- Does that make me a fag?

574
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,959
- Yeah. You're a fag.

575
00:21:33,959 --> 00:21:37,129
I mean, uh, technically, I
think. Or, non-technically.

576
00:21:37,129 --> 00:21:38,505
Which one is it, Todd?

577
00:21:38,505 --> 00:21:39,339
- Enlighten us.

578
00:21:39,339 --> 00:21:40,674
- Yeah, you're a fag.

579
00:21:40,674 --> 00:21:41,883
- Okay. What are we drinking?

580
00:21:41,883 --> 00:21:45,637
- I'm gonna go, uh, say
hi to the wallflowers.

581
00:21:45,637 --> 00:21:47,055
- Okay.
- Bye-bye.

582
00:21:48,098 --> 00:21:50,183
- Oh my god, do you smell
that? She smells like cinnamon.

583
00:21:50,183 --> 00:21:51,977
- I don't smell her at all anymore.

584
00:21:51,977 --> 00:21:54,855
- Hey, guys. Apparently, I'm a fag.

585
00:21:54,855 --> 00:21:55,647
- What?

586
00:21:55,647 --> 00:21:56,898
- Yeah, that's what we
just decided over there.

587
00:21:56,898 --> 00:21:58,442
- Oh, that's weird.

588
00:21:58,442 --> 00:22:00,610
- My fucking god, honey, you look so good.

589
00:22:00,610 --> 00:22:01,445
- Thank you.

590
00:22:01,445 --> 00:22:02,279
- [Yasmine] You look really hot.

591
00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:05,073
- Thank you.
- Oh, hey. Hi.

592
00:22:05,073 --> 00:22:06,074
- You look so cute.

593
00:22:06,074 --> 00:22:09,786
- Thank you. (giggles)
Oh, it's cold out here.

594
00:22:09,786 --> 00:22:11,079
- Oh, can you see my nipples?

595
00:22:11,079 --> 00:22:13,498
- (laughs) No, no, no. I
just got goose pimples.

596
00:22:13,498 --> 00:22:14,374
- Oh, good.

597
00:22:14,374 --> 00:22:16,793
- Maybe we should go inside?
- Alan, give me a hug.

598
00:22:16,793 --> 00:22:17,627
- Hey.

599
00:22:19,004 --> 00:22:19,838
- How are you?

600
00:22:19,838 --> 00:22:20,672
- I'm good.
- Good.

601
00:22:20,672 --> 00:22:21,506
- I'm good. How are you?

602
00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:22,507
- I'm so glad you came. I'm good.

603
00:22:22,507 --> 00:22:23,925
- You look really nice.
- Thanks.

604
00:22:23,925 --> 00:22:24,926
- You're welcome.

605
00:22:24,926 --> 00:22:27,721
- You didn't see me flash
Todd over there, did you?

606
00:22:27,721 --> 00:22:28,555
- Maybe.

607
00:22:29,639 --> 00:22:31,308
- That's embarrassing.
- Hello, hello, hello, hello.

608
00:22:31,308 --> 00:22:34,353
- Hey, hey, hey, buddy. How you doing?

609
00:22:34,353 --> 00:22:35,187
- Good.

610
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,021
- What is that smell?

611
00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:37,439
- That smell is daiquiris, my friend.

612
00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:38,565
And they're not virgin daiquiris,

613
00:22:38,565 --> 00:22:40,859
but that's okay because I am not a virgin.

614
00:22:40,859 --> 00:22:42,611
And if things go well tonight, Alan,

615
00:22:42,611 --> 00:22:44,112
you might not be a virgin tomorrow.

616
00:22:44,112 --> 00:22:45,614
- I'm, I'm not a, I'm not a virgin.

617
00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:48,533
- Hello, everyone. I'm Gordon.

618
00:22:48,533 --> 00:22:49,368
- Hi.

619
00:22:49,368 --> 00:22:50,202
- (laughs) We know.

620
00:22:50,202 --> 00:22:51,536
- And please, go easy on me

621
00:22:51,536 --> 00:22:54,873
because this is my first time on a farm.

622
00:22:56,208 --> 00:22:58,210
- This is really your
first time ever on a farm?

623
00:22:58,210 --> 00:23:00,545
- It is. It is. And I, you know,
it's not how I pictured it.

624
00:23:00,545 --> 00:23:01,797
It's not how I pictured it at all.

625
00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:05,884
I thought there would be
more hoes and more pigs.

626
00:23:06,885 --> 00:23:08,929
- I think everybody should
spend time on a farm.

627
00:23:08,929 --> 00:23:09,888
I grew up here.

628
00:23:09,888 --> 00:23:11,473
- [Todd] The gang's all here.

629
00:23:11,473 --> 00:23:12,307
(Tina chuckles)
- Yes, we are.

630
00:23:12,307 --> 00:23:13,141
- Hey, yo.

631
00:23:13,141 --> 00:23:15,018
- What do you guys think of my new outfit?

632
00:23:15,018 --> 00:23:16,061
No one's commented.

633
00:23:16,061 --> 00:23:16,895
- It's very smart.

634
00:23:16,895 --> 00:23:18,271
- These are new slacks,
this a new sweater.

635
00:23:18,271 --> 00:23:20,899
Rachel splurged on me.
- Did good.

636
00:23:20,899 --> 00:23:24,194
- I'd like to splurge on her. I'm kidding.

637
00:23:24,194 --> 00:23:27,030
- Yeah, these are brand new. Shit.

638
00:23:28,782 --> 00:23:29,908
- What babe?

639
00:23:29,908 --> 00:23:30,992
- Ah, nothing.

640
00:23:30,992 --> 00:23:31,827
- What, you forget something?

641
00:23:31,827 --> 00:23:33,078
- No, nothing. No.

642
00:23:33,078 --> 00:23:34,371
Uh, you know what? I had a thing.

643
00:23:34,371 --> 00:23:36,206
I must've left it in my other pants.

644
00:23:36,206 --> 00:23:38,333
You know, literally my other
pants, from this morning.

645
00:23:38,333 --> 00:23:40,335
Uh, fuck, I don't have any bars here.

646
00:23:40,335 --> 00:23:41,461
- Yeah, there's no landline.

647
00:23:41,461 --> 00:23:44,464
If you need to, there's a
two-foot pocket over there,

648
00:23:44,464 --> 00:23:45,632
down by the driveway.

649
00:23:45,632 --> 00:23:46,883
- There's a two-foot pocket over there?

650
00:23:46,883 --> 00:23:47,717
- Yeah, it gets service.

651
00:23:47,717 --> 00:23:49,010
Right down there, down by those trees.

652
00:23:49,010 --> 00:23:49,845
If you face-
- I gotta walk over there?

653
00:23:49,845 --> 00:23:51,555
- Yeah, face east, go to the pocket,

654
00:23:51,555 --> 00:23:53,223
and you might get something.

655
00:23:53,223 --> 00:23:54,433
- [Gordon] Okay, I got it.

656
00:23:54,433 --> 00:23:55,350
- [Todd] If you have to.

657
00:23:55,350 --> 00:23:56,476
- I have to.

658
00:23:56,476 --> 00:23:58,770
- Oh, tilt your head back,
that always helps me.

659
00:23:58,770 --> 00:24:00,939
- Okay, great. Thank
you ladies, gentlemen.

660
00:24:00,939 --> 00:24:02,315
Alan, I'll be right back.

661
00:24:02,315 --> 00:24:03,984
- Gordon, where are you going?

662
00:24:03,984 --> 00:24:05,777
- I'm not, I'm, I have
to, I ordered a pizza

663
00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:08,155
and I forgot to cancel
'cause I'm here now.

664
00:24:08,155 --> 00:24:09,865
So that wouldn't be very
nice for the Pizza Hut guy.

665
00:24:09,865 --> 00:24:12,701
So I'll be right back, okay? I love you.

666
00:24:12,701 --> 00:24:14,161
I miss you. All of you.

667
00:24:14,161 --> 00:24:15,078
- Take your time, Gordo.

668
00:24:15,078 --> 00:24:17,289
I got something to show them anyway.

669
00:24:17,289 --> 00:24:18,582
Follow me, gang. You're gonna love this.

670
00:24:18,582 --> 00:24:19,541
- All right, let's go.
- Okay.

671
00:24:19,541 --> 00:24:21,042
- Oh, oh, come on.

672
00:24:29,468 --> 00:24:31,970
(phone beeps)

673
00:24:33,889 --> 00:24:36,308
(Larenz chuckles)

674
00:24:36,308 --> 00:24:37,309
- My man.

675
00:24:37,309 --> 00:24:39,811
- Oh, Larenz, it is good
to hear your voice, buddy.

676
00:24:39,811 --> 00:24:41,730
Thank god you answered the phone.

677
00:24:41,730 --> 00:24:43,607
- Anything for my best customer.

678
00:24:43,607 --> 00:24:46,026
- Good, good, now listen. I
need a, I need a small favor.

679
00:24:46,026 --> 00:24:49,654
And, wait, did you,
I'm your best customer?

680
00:24:49,654 --> 00:24:52,365
- Yeah, for sure, man. (laughs)

681
00:24:52,365 --> 00:24:53,783
- That's not good.

682
00:24:53,783 --> 00:24:56,578
Um, okay, anyway, look,
I need a favor. Okay?

683
00:24:56,578 --> 00:24:57,662
- What is it, man?

684
00:24:57,662 --> 00:24:58,580
- I need you to come out and,

685
00:24:58,580 --> 00:25:00,582
and bring me some of that stuff, okay?

686
00:25:00,582 --> 00:25:01,750
And I'm a little ways outta town.

687
00:25:01,750 --> 00:25:03,585
- You're a little ways outta town?

688
00:25:03,585 --> 00:25:05,128
- 20 minutes tops.

689
00:25:05,128 --> 00:25:07,255
- G, what did you do with that
stuff I gave you yesterday?

690
00:25:07,255 --> 00:25:08,673
You didn't use it all, did you?

691
00:25:08,673 --> 00:25:10,509
- Yeah, I did already. No,
of course I didn't do that.

692
00:25:10,509 --> 00:25:12,761
It's, look, I got these new pants, okay-

693
00:25:12,761 --> 00:25:14,262
- G, hello? Hello?

694
00:25:16,306 --> 00:25:18,308
- Hello? Hello, Lorenz?

695
00:25:18,308 --> 00:25:21,269
- Hello? Yeah, yeah, I can
hear you now, go ahead.

696
00:25:21,269 --> 00:25:23,563
- Okay, so look, just
come on out here and,

697
00:25:23,563 --> 00:25:26,107
and leave now because it's
gonna take you a while

698
00:25:26,107 --> 00:25:26,942
to get here.

699
00:25:26,942 --> 00:25:28,777
- You said 20 minutes.

700
00:25:28,777 --> 00:25:29,945
- Yeah, give or take.

701
00:25:29,945 --> 00:25:31,071
- If I'm gonna be driving 20 minutes,

702
00:25:31,071 --> 00:25:33,031
you gotta make sure it's
worth my while, man.

703
00:25:33,031 --> 00:25:34,449
- It's, it's more like 30 minutes,

704
00:25:34,449 --> 00:25:36,076
but it's totally gonna
be worth your while.

705
00:25:36,076 --> 00:25:36,952
- What the hell in the country

706
00:25:36,952 --> 00:25:39,955
could possibly be worth my while, man?

707
00:25:39,955 --> 00:25:44,251
- How do you feel about
sexually-liberated white women?

708
00:25:44,251 --> 00:25:45,919
- Pretty smooth, huh?

709
00:25:45,919 --> 00:25:46,878
- What do you call this thing?

710
00:25:46,878 --> 00:25:48,004
- This is a chill-out tent.

711
00:25:48,004 --> 00:25:50,549
- Chill-out tent. Is
that like an escape pod?

712
00:25:50,549 --> 00:25:51,508
- No, Rachel, that would imply

713
00:25:51,508 --> 00:25:52,968
that you're escaping something.

714
00:25:52,968 --> 00:25:54,844
This is standard fair
for festivals and raves

715
00:25:54,844 --> 00:25:55,762
and stuff like that.

716
00:25:55,762 --> 00:25:57,597
If things get too intense in there,

717
00:25:57,597 --> 00:26:00,267
come in here, you hydrate,
you reflect on things.

718
00:26:00,267 --> 00:26:01,184
- Strategize.

719
00:26:01,184 --> 00:26:02,060
- Exactly.

720
00:26:02,060 --> 00:26:03,687
- It's an amazing tent, Todd.

721
00:26:03,687 --> 00:26:05,105
- It's Scotty's tent, actually.

722
00:26:05,105 --> 00:26:06,731
He took it to camp last summer.

723
00:26:06,731 --> 00:26:08,358
- And look at it now.

724
00:26:08,358 --> 00:26:09,985
It's got everything you
need for our purposes.

725
00:26:09,985 --> 00:26:11,570
It's got hand towels, you got your water,

726
00:26:11,570 --> 00:26:13,947
you got your latex needs
if you're into that.

727
00:26:13,947 --> 00:26:16,825
- Ooh, um, is the
chill-out tent non-smoking?

728
00:26:16,825 --> 00:26:17,659
- I don't know.

729
00:26:17,659 --> 00:26:20,453
Let me refer to my lovely
wife Tina on this one. Tina?

730
00:26:20,453 --> 00:26:22,914
- Oh, you can smoke in there,

731
00:26:22,914 --> 00:26:24,332
as long as you leave the flap open.

732
00:26:24,332 --> 00:26:26,209
- Gotcha, okay. All right.

733
00:26:26,209 --> 00:26:27,043
- Alan.

734
00:26:27,043 --> 00:26:28,378
- How many people can hang
out in the chill-out tent

735
00:26:28,378 --> 00:26:29,754
at any given time?

736
00:26:29,754 --> 00:26:33,049
- That's a good question. Two.

737
00:26:33,049 --> 00:26:34,259
- Um, one more question.

738
00:26:34,259 --> 00:26:38,805
Where does the chill-out
tent stand on abortion?

739
00:26:38,805 --> 00:26:40,140
- She's teasing you.

740
00:26:40,140 --> 00:26:40,974
- Oh.
- Oh.

741
00:26:40,974 --> 00:26:41,808
(both laugh)

742
00:26:41,808 --> 00:26:44,269
Oh, okay. Yeah, no
abortions in Scotty's tent.

743
00:26:44,269 --> 00:26:45,770
- No abortions anywhere, ever.

744
00:26:45,770 --> 00:26:46,605
- That's right.

745
00:26:46,605 --> 00:26:47,522
(Gordon vocalizing)

746
00:26:47,522 --> 00:26:48,607
- Hey. Whoa.

747
00:26:48,607 --> 00:26:49,858
- That's the spirit, Gordo.

748
00:26:49,858 --> 00:26:51,234
- Looks like someone
forgot to take his Ritalin.

749
00:26:51,234 --> 00:26:52,485
- I think he took some Ritalin.

750
00:26:52,485 --> 00:26:53,445
- Is that what it is?

751
00:26:53,445 --> 00:26:54,529
- Todd, Tina, Tina, shh.

752
00:26:54,529 --> 00:26:56,823
Can I get real with you for one second?

753
00:26:56,823 --> 00:26:58,241
I really wanna thank you

754
00:26:58,241 --> 00:26:59,659
for inviting me to this thing today.

755
00:26:59,659 --> 00:27:03,038
It really means, it means a lot to me.

756
00:27:03,038 --> 00:27:05,373
And it means a lot to Rachel too.

757
00:27:05,373 --> 00:27:06,666
- Oh, don't mention it, Gordo.

758
00:27:06,666 --> 00:27:08,668
I mean, we really, really,
really wanted Rachel to come,

759
00:27:08,668 --> 00:27:10,670
and you're dating Rachel,

760
00:27:10,670 --> 00:27:13,882
so it made perfect sense to me and Teeny.

761
00:27:13,882 --> 00:27:16,051
- Do you think Alan's happy I'm here?

762
00:27:16,051 --> 00:27:17,677
- Yes.
- Of course.

763
00:27:17,677 --> 00:27:18,511
- Really?

764
00:27:18,511 --> 00:27:20,388
Seems like he's been, I don't
know, teasing me or something

765
00:27:20,388 --> 00:27:21,348
since we got here.
- No, I'm not,

766
00:27:21,348 --> 00:27:22,182
I'm not teasing you, I'm not.

767
00:27:22,182 --> 00:27:23,558
- Just tell him you're sorry.

768
00:27:23,558 --> 00:27:25,060
- For what? I didn't do anything.

769
00:27:25,060 --> 00:27:27,312
- Rachel, will you tell
Alan that he really, really,

770
00:27:27,312 --> 00:27:29,105
really hurt my feelings?
- Gordon, knock it off.

771
00:27:29,105 --> 00:27:30,398
- I'm standing right here.
- What? Be groovy, man.

772
00:27:30,398 --> 00:27:31,274
Just be groovy.

773
00:27:31,274 --> 00:27:32,359
If we're gonna do this thing,

774
00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:34,110
you've gotta chill out and be groovy.

775
00:27:34,110 --> 00:27:35,695
Or there's an alternative.
- What?

776
00:27:35,695 --> 00:27:39,115
- You go back to Baton Rouge
and do math or whatever.

777
00:27:39,115 --> 00:27:41,034
- Great.
- 'Cause I agree, amigo.

778
00:27:41,034 --> 00:27:42,035
Let's go get some mojitos in us.

779
00:27:42,035 --> 00:27:42,869
- It's not me.

780
00:27:42,869 --> 00:27:44,579
- Yes, I'm, I'm good at math. So what?

781
00:27:44,579 --> 00:27:46,164
- Two plus two, four.
- Let's go do math.

782
00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:47,582
- I don't wanna go do math.
- Four plus four.

783
00:27:47,582 --> 00:27:49,751
- I didn't come out to
the country to do math.

784
00:27:49,751 --> 00:27:52,003
- Tina, you're mojito detail. Let's go.

785
00:27:52,003 --> 00:27:52,879
- [Rachel] Tina, Tina.

786
00:27:52,879 --> 00:27:56,216
- [Alan] So then you should know better.

787
00:27:57,926 --> 00:28:01,012
(footsteps stomping)

788
00:28:04,391 --> 00:28:06,810
- Oh my god, it is so beautiful out there.

789
00:28:06,810 --> 00:28:08,937
- I know. And the air is so crisp.

790
00:28:08,937 --> 00:28:09,896
- When the sun goes down,

791
00:28:09,896 --> 00:28:13,358
you can see literally hundreds of stars.

792
00:28:13,358 --> 00:28:14,901
- Who is this fine young gentleman?

793
00:28:14,901 --> 00:28:16,444
- Oh, Scotty, Scotty.

794
00:28:16,444 --> 00:28:17,237
- Ah!

795
00:28:26,371 --> 00:28:29,124
(Todd scrubbing)

796
00:28:34,421 --> 00:28:37,090
(water gushing)

797
00:28:44,347 --> 00:28:47,851
(water continues gushing)

798
00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:53,982
(water continues gushing)

799
00:28:59,195 --> 00:29:01,406
- He has the most beautiful calves now.

800
00:29:01,406 --> 00:29:04,367
They are just so cut
and smooth and hairless.

801
00:29:04,367 --> 00:29:06,369
Just a beautiful honey brown color.

802
00:29:06,369 --> 00:29:07,996
You just wanna take a
bite right out of them.

803
00:29:07,996 --> 00:29:08,830
- Scotty's calves?

804
00:29:08,830 --> 00:29:09,664
- Uh-huh.

805
00:29:09,664 --> 00:29:10,498
- Yeah, they're sweet as balls.

806
00:29:10,498 --> 00:29:11,499
- Oh yeah.

807
00:29:11,499 --> 00:29:13,835
- Oh, Alan, we forgot
to bring the wine in.

808
00:29:13,835 --> 00:29:15,211
I'm gonna go get it.

809
00:29:15,211 --> 00:29:17,547
- Going outside? Can I come?

810
00:29:18,798 --> 00:29:21,176
- So Alan, is this your
first time at the farm?

811
00:29:21,176 --> 00:29:23,344
- This is my first time.
I'm a Cummings virgin.

812
00:29:23,344 --> 00:29:25,388
- Oh really? You're an every...

813
00:29:25,388 --> 00:29:28,057
You're, I'm just saying
you're an everything's virgin.

814
00:29:28,057 --> 00:29:29,267
That's all I was gonna say.

815
00:29:29,267 --> 00:29:31,811
- Will, this is the living room.

816
00:29:31,811 --> 00:29:32,771
This is where we're gonna be tonight.

817
00:29:32,771 --> 00:29:34,439
- No, no, no. We're not gonna be here.

818
00:29:34,439 --> 00:29:35,273
Are you, you're joking. Right?

819
00:29:35,273 --> 00:29:36,691
Because this is like

820
00:29:36,691 --> 00:29:39,152
where my grandma would
have like an orgy with

821
00:29:39,152 --> 00:29:40,445
after bingo or something.

822
00:29:40,445 --> 00:29:42,280
And if we're gonna have an
orgy, you're gonna have like,

823
00:29:42,280 --> 00:29:43,531
first of all, you're gonna cover every,

824
00:29:43,531 --> 00:29:44,616
everything with plastic, right?

825
00:29:44,616 --> 00:29:46,743
Because we're gonna get
really wet and sloppy

826
00:29:46,743 --> 00:29:47,994
and there's gonna be like a slip and slide

827
00:29:47,994 --> 00:29:49,037
and probably like lava lamps

828
00:29:49,037 --> 00:29:50,663
and everything to create like a mood.

829
00:29:50,663 --> 00:29:53,875
And maybe you're gonna
have like, I don't know,

830
00:29:53,875 --> 00:29:55,668
what's the spinning ball
called, you know that thing?

831
00:29:55,668 --> 00:29:56,503
- A disco ball?
- Disco ball.

832
00:29:56,503 --> 00:29:58,338
- Yeah, yeah. Where's all that stuff?

833
00:29:58,338 --> 00:29:59,172
- Is he being silly?

834
00:29:59,172 --> 00:30:00,131
- No. Yes.

835
00:30:00,131 --> 00:30:00,924
- Oh.

836
00:30:00,924 --> 00:30:03,426
- He'll just keep going
unless you stop him.

837
00:30:03,426 --> 00:30:05,720
- Well, actually Todd wanted
to get some beanbag chairs.

838
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:07,305
I didn't think so.
- Ooh, no, no.

839
00:30:07,305 --> 00:30:08,556
Good thing you didn't.
- No, really? Why?

840
00:30:08,556 --> 00:30:10,683
- I had one freshman year in college

841
00:30:10,683 --> 00:30:12,143
and every time I had sex on it,

842
00:30:12,143 --> 00:30:14,354
it would stick to my private areas.

843
00:30:14,354 --> 00:30:15,396
Like the really sensitive areas.

844
00:30:15,396 --> 00:30:16,940
It's like ripping off a bandaid.

845
00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:18,316
- Oh!
- Yeah. Good choice.

846
00:30:18,316 --> 00:30:19,317
- Thank you.

847
00:30:20,944 --> 00:30:23,404
- I think that's hot. Why
do I think that's hot?

848
00:30:23,404 --> 00:30:26,491
- Because she was 18, Alan. Very hot.

849
00:30:27,951 --> 00:30:29,911
Tina, can you help me
find something in here?

850
00:30:29,911 --> 00:30:30,745
- Oh.

851
00:30:33,957 --> 00:30:35,375
- Tina, do you have any scissors?

852
00:30:35,375 --> 00:30:36,417
- What do you need them for?

853
00:30:36,417 --> 00:30:38,503
- The tags are still on these clothes

854
00:30:38,503 --> 00:30:41,214
and they're chafing my neck and it hurts.

855
00:30:41,214 --> 00:30:45,635
- Oh. I've got my sewing
scissors in the bedroom.

856
00:30:45,635 --> 00:30:47,095
Come on. I'll sort you out.

857
00:30:47,095 --> 00:30:47,929
- Okay.

858
00:30:50,765 --> 00:30:52,433
- Can I get another one of them hugs?

859
00:30:52,433 --> 00:30:53,268
- [Yasmine] Okay.

860
00:30:53,268 --> 00:30:54,394
- I'm, I'm feeling it.

861
00:30:54,394 --> 00:30:56,855
- Oh, don't squeeze me,
I'm gonna pee my pants.

862
00:30:56,855 --> 00:30:57,689
- Oh, really?

863
00:30:57,689 --> 00:30:58,690
- Yes! Todd, I'm serious.

864
00:30:58,690 --> 00:31:00,775
- Come on, I wanna make
some lemonade for my party!

865
00:31:00,775 --> 00:31:03,111
- Don't be an asshole. No, Todd.

866
00:31:03,111 --> 00:31:04,696
- Did I get a drop?

867
00:31:07,657 --> 00:31:09,993
- Oh my god, I'm sorry.
Oh my god, are you okay?

868
00:31:09,993 --> 00:31:11,327
- Yeah, I'm fine. I'm into that.

869
00:31:11,327 --> 00:31:12,579
You just caught me off guard.

870
00:31:12,579 --> 00:31:15,123
- That was my first reaction.
(laughs) Are you mad?

871
00:31:15,123 --> 00:31:17,542
- I'm not mad, no. But look what you did.

872
00:31:17,542 --> 00:31:19,002
- I don't, are you bleeding?

873
00:31:19,002 --> 00:31:20,628
- Sort of.

874
00:31:20,628 --> 00:31:21,462
- Oh. Oh!

875
00:31:23,673 --> 00:31:26,509
- Yeah, I like it. Do you like it?

876
00:31:28,928 --> 00:31:32,682
- I don't even think
that guy had two eyes.

877
00:31:32,682 --> 00:31:33,933
- Pee-pee time.

878
00:31:36,769 --> 00:31:39,355
- Well, he had two eyes.
Just one didn't work.

879
00:31:39,355 --> 00:31:40,189
- Oh.

880
00:31:43,484 --> 00:31:47,280
- Oh, look at you two, all cozy and shit.

881
00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:49,532
- I was just admiring your
channel selection, Todd.

882
00:31:49,532 --> 00:31:52,285
- Yeah? We got the whole world in there.

883
00:31:52,285 --> 00:31:53,161
- No, wait, go back.

884
00:31:53,161 --> 00:31:54,621
- What, cartoons?
- Don't change that.

885
00:31:54,621 --> 00:31:55,580
- You wanna?

886
00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:57,081
- Yeah. It's a little monkey.

887
00:31:57,081 --> 00:31:57,916
- All right.

888
00:31:57,916 --> 00:32:00,335
- I think it's like 570, 575.

889
00:32:01,252 --> 00:32:02,086
No? 572?

890
00:32:04,672 --> 00:32:06,174
576?
- There you go.

891
00:32:06,174 --> 00:32:07,008
- There, yeah.

892
00:32:07,008 --> 00:32:08,301
- Hey, let me see that. Let me see that.

893
00:32:08,301 --> 00:32:09,302
- All right, but we're watching cartoons.

894
00:32:09,302 --> 00:32:11,888
- Just turn it up a little bit.

895
00:32:17,518 --> 00:32:21,230
(batteries clatter)

896
00:32:21,230 --> 00:32:24,025
- You guys can watch TV
on your own time, right?

897
00:32:24,025 --> 00:32:24,901
- All right. Let's see.

898
00:32:24,901 --> 00:32:27,654
I don't know why Rachel didn't do this.

899
00:32:27,654 --> 00:32:29,405
I always take them out right
after he tries them on.

900
00:32:29,405 --> 00:32:33,910
That's when I do it.
You're officially detagged.

901
00:32:33,910 --> 00:32:36,537
- That's much better.
I feel like a new man.

902
00:32:36,537 --> 00:32:37,705
- Oh, good.

903
00:32:37,705 --> 00:32:39,874
- You're a princess. No,
that's not good enough.

904
00:32:39,874 --> 00:32:41,751
That's not good enough. You're a queen.

905
00:32:41,751 --> 00:32:42,543
- Well...

906
00:32:43,628 --> 00:32:44,712
- Queen Tina.

907
00:32:47,215 --> 00:32:49,175
You know, I, I think I have another one.

908
00:32:49,175 --> 00:32:50,593
Yeah, yeah, that's a tag.

909
00:32:50,593 --> 00:32:52,971
I didn't, I didn't know, but there it is.

910
00:32:52,971 --> 00:32:55,640
Yeah, it's a big one. It's
right between my legs.

911
00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:57,892
You wanna snip it?

912
00:32:57,892 --> 00:32:58,726
- Oh yeah.

913
00:32:58,726 --> 00:33:00,478
- Can you get it? Can you see it?

914
00:33:00,478 --> 00:33:01,646
- Oh, I got-
- Can you feel it?

915
00:33:01,646 --> 00:33:04,273
- Oh, there it is right there. Stay still.

916
00:33:04,273 --> 00:33:06,985
- Okay, just take it. Yeah.

917
00:33:06,985 --> 00:33:08,027
Hey, can you do circumcisions?

918
00:33:08,027 --> 00:33:09,278
Because I think mine grew back.

919
00:33:09,278 --> 00:33:11,114
- No, I do not.

920
00:33:11,114 --> 00:33:14,659
- Okay, that's fair. That's fair.

921
00:33:14,659 --> 00:33:16,285
You're really pretty.

922
00:33:16,285 --> 00:33:17,286
- Thank you.

923
00:33:17,286 --> 00:33:19,580
- I mean, you're like much
prettier than I remember.

924
00:33:19,580 --> 00:33:23,251
This, uh, this farm
life. It's good for you.

925
00:33:24,419 --> 00:33:25,920
- Rachel is so pretty.

926
00:33:25,920 --> 00:33:29,215
- Yeah, she's cute. You
have this glow though.

927
00:33:29,215 --> 00:33:32,301
This, this pregnant woman's glow.

928
00:33:32,301 --> 00:33:33,886
- Well, I'm not pregnant right now.

929
00:33:33,886 --> 00:33:37,557
- No, but you have been. It's
like an afterglow, you know?

930
00:33:37,557 --> 00:33:38,391
- I guess.

931
00:33:39,642 --> 00:33:41,477
- Can I rub your feet?

932
00:33:47,567 --> 00:33:51,404
- Yeah, all right. Maybe we
should go back out there.

933
00:33:51,404 --> 00:33:52,822
- Oh, whoops. Sorry.

934
00:33:52,822 --> 00:33:56,075
Thought everyone was in here. Carry on.

935
00:33:58,077 --> 00:33:59,746
- Ah, alone at last.

936
00:34:02,081 --> 00:34:04,959
- We should probably go back out there.

937
00:34:04,959 --> 00:34:06,377
- Okay, let's go.

938
00:34:09,547 --> 00:34:11,966
(Tina sighs)

939
00:34:19,307 --> 00:34:22,018
(birds chirping)

940
00:34:25,521 --> 00:34:28,733
Oh, Todd, Tina is so sweet and motherly.

941
00:34:28,733 --> 00:34:31,652
She makes me feel so welcome here.

942
00:34:31,652 --> 00:34:33,654
Alan, I can't wait to do your girlfriend.

943
00:34:33,654 --> 00:34:34,614
- Mind reader.

944
00:34:34,614 --> 00:34:35,948
- I need a drink.

945
00:34:35,948 --> 00:34:39,077
- Hey, Tina, they're getting
thirsty in here. Organize.

946
00:34:39,077 --> 00:34:41,329
Would it speed things along
if these two helped you?

947
00:34:41,329 --> 00:34:43,414
- Oh my god, please. You guys just relax.

948
00:34:43,414 --> 00:34:45,374
Let us serve you. Please,
it would be our honor.

949
00:34:45,374 --> 00:34:46,209
- Yeah.

950
00:34:46,209 --> 00:34:47,627
- Oh, thank you.
- You're stressed out.

951
00:34:47,627 --> 00:34:49,879
- [Todd] Fellas. Up, up, up.

952
00:34:49,879 --> 00:34:52,465
You guys wanna smoke some shit?

953
00:34:54,634 --> 00:34:55,635
- Hey. Okay.

954
00:34:56,803 --> 00:34:58,930
- Are we leaving?
- No, but just so you know,

955
00:34:58,930 --> 00:35:00,264
when this whole thing gets started,

956
00:35:00,264 --> 00:35:02,892
I'm gonna need you to
keep Gordon away from me.

957
00:35:02,892 --> 00:35:04,477
- What do you mean?

958
00:35:04,477 --> 00:35:05,853
- I don't know. Cockblock him.

959
00:35:05,853 --> 00:35:07,063
He's, he's not fucking me.

960
00:35:07,063 --> 00:35:08,815
He's, he's annoying. I hate him.

961
00:35:08,815 --> 00:35:11,150
- Well, what am I supposed to
do? It's like a free for all.

962
00:35:11,150 --> 00:35:13,611
I mean, how do I do that?

963
00:35:13,611 --> 00:35:15,363
- You're right. Fine.

964
00:35:16,322 --> 00:35:17,949
I just don't wanna look
at his stupid face.

965
00:35:17,949 --> 00:35:19,867
Um, doggy style?

966
00:35:19,867 --> 00:35:20,910
- That's a good compromise.

967
00:35:20,910 --> 00:35:22,662
- Yeah, okay.
- Okay.

968
00:35:26,457 --> 00:35:28,167
- Shall we lock the door?

969
00:35:28,167 --> 00:35:30,628
- That sounds like a good idea, actually.

970
00:35:30,628 --> 00:35:31,546
- We can have a party of our own.

971
00:35:31,546 --> 00:35:32,755
- I think you're so bad.

972
00:35:32,755 --> 00:35:34,298
- Let's get naked.

973
00:35:34,298 --> 00:35:36,884
(Alan choking)

974
00:35:39,220 --> 00:35:42,473
- Are you laughing or coughing?

975
00:35:42,473 --> 00:35:44,725
I told you not to inhale these, man.

976
00:35:44,725 --> 00:35:47,603
Cigar smoke is three times
stronger than cigarette smoke.

977
00:35:47,603 --> 00:35:49,188
- I don't, I don't smoke cigarettes.

978
00:35:49,188 --> 00:35:51,774
- You should. It's cool.

979
00:35:51,774 --> 00:35:53,192
So you guys having a good time?

980
00:35:53,192 --> 00:35:55,486
You like it out here at Cummings Farm?

981
00:35:55,486 --> 00:35:56,821
- It's nice. The air's nice.

982
00:35:56,821 --> 00:35:57,655
- I like it too.

983
00:35:57,655 --> 00:35:58,823
- It is nice.

984
00:35:58,823 --> 00:36:01,284
- Is this a farm or a ranch?

985
00:36:01,284 --> 00:36:02,952
- I don't know. You'd have
to ask Tina about that.

986
00:36:02,952 --> 00:36:05,037
- It's a franch.

987
00:36:05,037 --> 00:36:06,747
- [Todd] So you guys know
the full deal here tonight.

988
00:36:06,747 --> 00:36:07,999
You know what's supposed to go down?

989
00:36:07,999 --> 00:36:10,543
- I think so. A little this.

990
00:36:10,543 --> 00:36:12,336
- Exactly. See, I didn't
know if you guys knew.

991
00:36:12,336 --> 00:36:14,338
You guys are acting kind of like fags.

992
00:36:14,338 --> 00:36:15,798
- I don't think I've been acting gay.

993
00:36:15,798 --> 00:36:17,258
- You gotta put the vibe out there more.

994
00:36:17,258 --> 00:36:18,426
You gotta let it fester.

995
00:36:18,426 --> 00:36:19,468
You know what I've been doing all that?

996
00:36:19,468 --> 00:36:20,344
I've been letting it linger

997
00:36:20,344 --> 00:36:22,555
with the eye contact on the
girls, making little comments.

998
00:36:22,555 --> 00:36:24,724
Remember like when I said I
was gonna splurge on Rachel?

999
00:36:24,724 --> 00:36:25,558
- I did.

1000
00:36:25,558 --> 00:36:27,602
- Todd, I took my pants
off in front of your wife.

1001
00:36:27,602 --> 00:36:29,395
- You did? Nice work, Gordo.

1002
00:36:29,395 --> 00:36:31,063
- Thank you.

1003
00:36:31,063 --> 00:36:34,609
- So ladies, what do we
think about all this?

1004
00:36:34,609 --> 00:36:36,861
- Well, I think we just
make one round of these

1005
00:36:36,861 --> 00:36:38,321
and then switch to wine.

1006
00:36:38,321 --> 00:36:41,699
- No, I mean tonight. Like all of this.

1007
00:36:41,699 --> 00:36:43,201
What do you think?

1008
00:36:45,369 --> 00:36:47,788
- Well, Todd really
wants it to be special.

1009
00:36:47,788 --> 00:36:50,416
- I know, with the torches and the tent

1010
00:36:50,416 --> 00:36:51,959
and the specialty drinks.

1011
00:36:51,959 --> 00:36:53,085
It's so cute.

1012
00:36:53,085 --> 00:36:57,256
- I just, I don't wanna disappoint
him. He's worked so hard.

1013
00:36:57,256 --> 00:37:00,927
He really has. I've never
seen him so focused.

1014
00:37:00,927 --> 00:37:03,304
Just, it's weird for me, you know?

1015
00:37:03,304 --> 00:37:06,265
I grew up here, spent my childhood here.

1016
00:37:06,265 --> 00:37:08,559
- I'm not trying to bail out or anything.

1017
00:37:08,559 --> 00:37:09,769
- It's all right if you want to.

1018
00:37:09,769 --> 00:37:13,731
- No, I'm just saying
we're kind of at point A.

1019
00:37:13,731 --> 00:37:16,651
We need to be at point Z, you know?

1020
00:37:17,526 --> 00:37:19,278
We should just be naked
when they get back in.

1021
00:37:19,278 --> 00:37:23,741
- That'd be so funny.
Like, "Oh my god, hey."

1022
00:37:23,741 --> 00:37:24,992
We need to stop being Charlottes

1023
00:37:24,992 --> 00:37:26,118
and go full on Samanthas.

1024
00:37:26,118 --> 00:37:27,078
I'm sick of this.
- Yes.

1025
00:37:27,078 --> 00:37:27,954
I agree.

1026
00:37:27,954 --> 00:37:28,788
- You know, I don't think Todd

1027
00:37:28,788 --> 00:37:31,040
wants to just jump
right into it like that.

1028
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:31,874
- He doesn't?

1029
00:37:31,874 --> 00:37:33,125
- No, it's-
- Oh really?

1030
00:37:33,125 --> 00:37:36,629
- No, he's got all kinds
of talking points to,

1031
00:37:36,629 --> 00:37:37,463
to go through.

1032
00:37:37,463 --> 00:37:39,924
- Like rules, guidelines? I don't...

1033
00:37:39,924 --> 00:37:40,925
- Chitchat.

1034
00:37:40,925 --> 00:37:41,759
- Weird.

1035
00:37:41,759 --> 00:37:43,261
- Like icebreakers.

1036
00:37:43,261 --> 00:37:44,136
- Okay.

1037
00:37:44,136 --> 00:37:46,722
- You know, games. It'll be fun.

1038
00:37:46,722 --> 00:37:48,808
- I had Yasmine almost pissing her pants

1039
00:37:48,808 --> 00:37:51,060
from my nads over there by the cars.

1040
00:37:51,060 --> 00:37:52,687
- Why? Why was she pissing her pants?

1041
00:37:52,687 --> 00:37:53,896
- We went out to go get the wine

1042
00:37:53,896 --> 00:37:55,439
and I gave her a big, huge bear hug.

1043
00:37:55,439 --> 00:37:57,858
And she grinded her pussy
bones so deep into my guts

1044
00:37:57,858 --> 00:37:59,151
I almost shit my pants.

1045
00:37:59,151 --> 00:38:00,027
- Yeah, she's a whore.

1046
00:38:00,027 --> 00:38:01,529
I've been giving her
the, uh, fuck you eyes.

1047
00:38:01,529 --> 00:38:03,406
You know, like this.

1048
00:38:03,406 --> 00:38:04,323
- But like the nice ones.

1049
00:38:04,323 --> 00:38:05,658
- Yeah, and she's giving me like.

1050
00:38:05,658 --> 00:38:07,201
I'm like, "Fuck," and now she's come,

1051
00:38:07,201 --> 00:38:09,495
she's kind of coming back now
with a little bit like, "Fuck?

1052
00:38:09,495 --> 00:38:10,413
Fuck?" And I'm like, "Fuck."

1053
00:38:10,413 --> 00:38:12,957
And she's, she's starting
to, every time I, I see her,

1054
00:38:12,957 --> 00:38:14,917
I catch her looking at me like, "Fuck."

1055
00:38:14,917 --> 00:38:16,752
- I've noticed that. See,
he's doing a good job.

1056
00:38:16,752 --> 00:38:18,212
You gotta treat the sluts like sluts,

1057
00:38:18,212 --> 00:38:19,672
and then we can get in their butts.

1058
00:38:19,672 --> 00:38:20,506
I wrote that.

1059
00:38:20,506 --> 00:38:21,966
- I'm making, I'm making Rachel laugh.

1060
00:38:21,966 --> 00:38:24,802
And I got her alone in
the, in the TV room.

1061
00:38:24,802 --> 00:38:26,470
- She'll laugh at anything, man.

1062
00:38:26,470 --> 00:38:28,389
- Yeah, pussies don't laugh.

1063
00:38:28,389 --> 00:38:29,390
You're hilarious and all,

1064
00:38:29,390 --> 00:38:31,809
but sitting on the couch,
watching TV, making jokes.

1065
00:38:31,809 --> 00:38:33,811
That's not gonna help
us. That's gonna hurt us.

1066
00:38:33,811 --> 00:38:34,645
- That's hurting?

1067
00:38:34,645 --> 00:38:36,022
- You need to be sexy.

1068
00:38:36,022 --> 00:38:37,690
Undo a couple buttons on that shirt.

1069
00:38:37,690 --> 00:38:39,567
Maybe take those glasses off.

1070
00:38:39,567 --> 00:38:41,610
- No, you should keep those on, Todd.

1071
00:38:41,610 --> 00:38:43,571
- Oh yeah, put those back on.

1072
00:38:43,571 --> 00:38:44,697
- You can take them off when we fuck.

1073
00:38:44,697 --> 00:38:45,990
Unless you got like those Kurt Rambis,

1074
00:38:45,990 --> 00:38:48,951
kinda like NBA, just, like,
wrap around, like, googles.

1075
00:38:48,951 --> 00:38:50,578
- Like when I, no, no, no.

1076
00:38:50,578 --> 00:38:52,705
- Just in case anyone
of them are squirters.

1077
00:38:52,705 --> 00:38:53,581
Are they squirters?

1078
00:38:53,581 --> 00:38:55,666
- One of them might be.
I'm not telling who though.

1079
00:38:55,666 --> 00:38:57,460
- Oh, are either of you on your cycles?

1080
00:38:57,460 --> 00:38:58,586
- Just finished.

1081
00:38:58,586 --> 00:39:00,296
- Mine's about to start.

1082
00:39:00,296 --> 00:39:01,964
I'm willing it away for one more night.

1083
00:39:01,964 --> 00:39:04,258
- Oh, well if it happens, it happens.

1084
00:39:04,258 --> 00:39:07,511
There's nothing you can do about that.

1085
00:39:07,511 --> 00:39:11,182
- Gordon likes feet.
He just, he loves feet.

1086
00:39:12,641 --> 00:39:14,393
He could be face down, dead drunk,

1087
00:39:14,393 --> 00:39:18,356
and if I just stick my big toe
right near his mouth, boing.

1088
00:39:18,356 --> 00:39:20,232
- Ew. God.
- Yeah, I know.

1089
00:39:20,232 --> 00:39:21,567
- That's nasty.

1090
00:39:21,567 --> 00:39:23,027
- It feels amazing.

1091
00:39:23,027 --> 00:39:24,111
- Well...
- Yeah.

1092
00:39:24,111 --> 00:39:25,363
- But you have nice feet.

1093
00:39:25,363 --> 00:39:26,197
- You have nice feet.

1094
00:39:26,197 --> 00:39:28,074
- No, I don't. I was a
dancer, so my shit's gnarled.

1095
00:39:28,074 --> 00:39:29,367
- Todd likes the butt.

1096
00:39:29,367 --> 00:39:30,326
- What?

1097
00:39:30,326 --> 00:39:31,786
- Todd likes the butt.

1098
00:39:31,786 --> 00:39:35,122
- Mm-mm, mm-mm. I don't do ass play.

1099
00:39:35,122 --> 00:39:36,207
I don't.

1100
00:39:36,207 --> 00:39:37,500
We're gonna have to really,

1101
00:39:37,500 --> 00:39:38,667
you know, lay down the guidelines.

1102
00:39:38,667 --> 00:39:39,502
That's a good idea.

1103
00:39:39,502 --> 00:39:41,128
- All right, well, you, you tell him that,

1104
00:39:41,128 --> 00:39:42,129
'cause he'll make a beeline right for it.

1105
00:39:42,129 --> 00:39:42,963
- Ugh.

1106
00:39:42,963 --> 00:39:45,216
- I'm not opposed to a finger tip,

1107
00:39:45,216 --> 00:39:47,468
finger in there sometimes.

1108
00:39:47,468 --> 00:39:51,263
- You know, we're married
so he bought the cow.

1109
00:39:51,263 --> 00:39:54,308
He can do whatever he wants, rightfully.

1110
00:39:54,308 --> 00:39:56,560
Um, honey, this is parsley.

1111
00:40:01,190 --> 00:40:02,525
- Did I do that?

1112
00:40:03,484 --> 00:40:04,735
- I think you did.

1113
00:40:04,735 --> 00:40:05,569
- Darn it.

1114
00:40:07,029 --> 00:40:09,615
- It's okay.
- We've got, we have wine.

1115
00:40:09,615 --> 00:40:10,950
- I, I prefer wine.

1116
00:40:10,950 --> 00:40:12,618
- I like wine better.
- I like wine better.

1117
00:40:12,618 --> 00:40:15,788
- It's a better buzz.
Do you have a corkscrew?

1118
00:40:15,788 --> 00:40:16,622
- No.

1119
00:40:17,706 --> 00:40:20,084
- Okay, best pussy you ever had.

1120
00:40:20,084 --> 00:40:22,878
- It's hard to believe,
I know, but it is Rachel.

1121
00:40:22,878 --> 00:40:25,464
- Yeah, honestly, I think it's,

1122
00:40:27,133 --> 00:40:29,385
I can't even remember
anything before Yasmine.

1123
00:40:29,385 --> 00:40:34,390
- You guys can't pick your
girlfriends for best pussy ever.

1124
00:40:34,765 --> 00:40:36,225
God, you guys.

1125
00:40:36,225 --> 00:40:37,059
- How's Tina?

1126
00:40:37,059 --> 00:40:38,060
- Tina?
- Yeah.

1127
00:40:38,060 --> 00:40:40,104
- Tina's pussy is terrific.

1128
00:40:40,104 --> 00:40:41,063
- Ah. See?

1129
00:40:41,063 --> 00:40:43,399
- It is just like fucking...

1130
00:40:43,399 --> 00:40:44,650
- That's awesome. I knew it.

1131
00:40:44,650 --> 00:40:47,403
- You know what? It's wrecked.

1132
00:40:47,403 --> 00:40:49,321
I can't recommend it.

1133
00:40:49,321 --> 00:40:52,324
You know, she's had a couple
of kids and they came out,

1134
00:40:52,324 --> 00:40:54,410
and they must have been really
moving their heads around,

1135
00:40:54,410 --> 00:40:56,287
'cause that thing is loose as a goose.

1136
00:40:56,287 --> 00:40:57,997
- If I ever got a girl pregnant

1137
00:40:57,997 --> 00:40:59,123
and I was gonna keep fucking her,

1138
00:40:59,123 --> 00:41:02,293
I'd cut her up, take the baby.

1139
00:41:02,293 --> 00:41:04,753
- She's a great mom, she's a good kisser,

1140
00:41:04,753 --> 00:41:08,132
but, um, you know, her butt still works.

1141
00:41:08,132 --> 00:41:09,091
- Ah.
- Her butt's great.

1142
00:41:09,091 --> 00:41:10,885
But I gotta space that out
'cause I'm married to her.

1143
00:41:10,885 --> 00:41:13,596
And if that thing goes, I'm kinda fucked.

1144
00:41:13,596 --> 00:41:14,430
- Just push it.

1145
00:41:14,430 --> 00:41:15,389
- I'm doing it.
- I'll hold the bottom.

1146
00:41:15,389 --> 00:41:16,974
- I'm scared it's gonna break.

1147
00:41:16,974 --> 00:41:17,808
- If it breaks-
- You got it,

1148
00:41:17,808 --> 00:41:18,642
you got it, you got it.

1149
00:41:18,642 --> 00:41:19,768
- [Tina] It's moving. It's moving.

1150
00:41:19,768 --> 00:41:20,603
- Do it.
- Oh yes.

1151
00:41:20,603 --> 00:41:21,854
- You got it, you got it.

1152
00:41:21,854 --> 00:41:23,063
- Oh no.
- I got it, I got it,

1153
00:41:23,063 --> 00:41:24,190
I got it, I got it.

1154
00:41:24,190 --> 00:41:26,525
No, I got it. Here we go.

1155
00:41:26,525 --> 00:41:28,027
- Hold the bottle.

1156
00:41:29,403 --> 00:41:30,237
- Yay!

1157
00:41:30,237 --> 00:41:31,739
- Oh my god, that was so scary.

1158
00:41:31,739 --> 00:41:34,033
- It splashed on me.

1159
00:41:34,033 --> 00:41:35,326
- Don't waste a drop. Lick it up.

1160
00:41:35,326 --> 00:41:36,660
- [Yasmine] Whoo!

1161
00:41:36,660 --> 00:41:37,912
- You know what?
- What?

1162
00:41:37,912 --> 00:41:39,622
- I like you, Alan.

1163
00:41:39,622 --> 00:41:41,665
I'm gonna give you
green on Rachel's pussy.

1164
00:41:41,665 --> 00:41:43,667
- What is that? What's green on the pussy?

1165
00:41:43,667 --> 00:41:46,003
- Because I think you're
gonna be MVP tonight.

1166
00:41:46,003 --> 00:41:47,838
Most valuable penis.

1167
00:41:47,838 --> 00:41:48,672
- Oh.

1168
00:41:48,672 --> 00:41:50,299
- There's something inside of you Alan.

1169
00:41:50,299 --> 00:41:54,261
There's something inside
of you waiting to get out.

1170
00:41:54,261 --> 00:41:57,181
- Well, after he gets out,
put it back in tomorrow.

1171
00:41:57,181 --> 00:41:58,057
Shouldn't stay there.

1172
00:41:58,057 --> 00:42:00,059
- You gotta fester the vibe though.

1173
00:42:00,059 --> 00:42:03,604
You gotta fester the vibe
like a herpe in the sun.

1174
00:42:03,604 --> 00:42:07,358
- Okay. Sounds painful, but if it works.

1175
00:42:07,358 --> 00:42:10,778
- This cigar's making me really nauseous.

1176
00:42:12,530 --> 00:42:14,573
- You guys suck at smoking cigars.

1177
00:42:14,573 --> 00:42:16,367
- Yes we do.

1178
00:42:16,367 --> 00:42:17,952
- I need a drink.

1179
00:42:17,952 --> 00:42:19,954
- Could have been fun.

1180
00:42:19,954 --> 00:42:22,456
They're not Cuban, but they're,

1181
00:42:22,456 --> 00:42:23,624
I got them at the gas station.

1182
00:42:23,624 --> 00:42:24,542
- Oh.

1183
00:42:24,542 --> 00:42:27,378
♪ Nah, it's whatever, it's
whatever in that sub, what ♪

1184
00:42:27,378 --> 00:42:30,339
♪ Nah, it's whatever, it's
whatever in that third, what ♪

1185
00:42:30,339 --> 00:42:33,384
♪ Nah, it's whatever, it's
whatever in that sub, what ♪

1186
00:42:33,384 --> 00:42:35,344
♪ Now gon' crank the
slack, roll the pack ♪

1187
00:42:35,344 --> 00:42:37,346
♪ Power ♪

1188
00:42:39,557 --> 00:42:41,725
- Love of my life, apple of my eye.

1189
00:42:41,725 --> 00:42:44,687
It is good to hold you again.

1190
00:42:44,687 --> 00:42:45,688
- Of course.

1191
00:42:46,939 --> 00:42:48,983
- Whew, you guys smell
like a cigar factory.

1192
00:42:48,983 --> 00:42:51,110
- Baby, what's this? I thought
we were gonna have mojitos.

1193
00:42:51,110 --> 00:42:52,194
- We had to improvise.

1194
00:42:52,194 --> 00:42:55,781
- The wine attacked
Tina. It was hilarious.

1195
00:42:59,201 --> 00:43:00,828
- I suddenly feel really tired.

1196
00:43:00,828 --> 00:43:04,456
- Hey, look alive. I'll
be right back, everybody.

1197
00:43:04,456 --> 00:43:05,541
- Where, where are you going?

1198
00:43:05,541 --> 00:43:07,835
- I gotta go, uh, torch the tikis.

1199
00:43:07,835 --> 00:43:08,836
- Is that code for something?

1200
00:43:08,836 --> 00:43:11,338
- Yeah, I can do it by myself.

1201
00:43:14,341 --> 00:43:15,551
- Anybody mind if I lock the door now?

1202
00:43:15,551 --> 00:43:16,343
- Please.

1203
00:43:17,511 --> 00:43:19,096
- Yeah, that's what Yaz was saying earlier

1204
00:43:19,096 --> 00:43:20,514
when you guys were outside.

1205
00:43:20,514 --> 00:43:23,017
(Tina laughs)

1206
00:43:27,313 --> 00:43:30,065
(lighter clicks)

1207
00:43:35,446 --> 00:43:37,615
- Hey, Tina, do you have any cheese?

1208
00:43:37,615 --> 00:43:38,657
Sounds good, right?
- That sounds good.

1209
00:43:38,657 --> 00:43:39,491
- That would be so good, yeah.

1210
00:43:39,491 --> 00:43:40,576
- Yeah, cheese and wine.

1211
00:43:40,576 --> 00:43:43,245
I love wine and cheese.
It gives me a boner.

1212
00:43:43,245 --> 00:43:44,788
- I think I got some
Kraft singles and some-

1213
00:43:44,788 --> 00:43:45,914
- Oh, perfect.
- Saltines.

1214
00:43:45,914 --> 00:43:46,749
That'll do.

1215
00:43:46,749 --> 00:43:48,167
- It's like a, a Lunchable for alcoholics.

1216
00:43:48,167 --> 00:43:52,379
- Totally. It's like cheese,
wine, crackers, sardines.

1217
00:43:52,379 --> 00:43:54,298
- Served in every boxcar
across the country.

1218
00:43:54,298 --> 00:43:56,634
- You two love being ironic.

1219
00:43:57,468 --> 00:43:59,720
- That's not what irony is.

1220
00:44:01,138 --> 00:44:02,306
- We disagree.

1221
00:44:04,224 --> 00:44:06,560
- Let's get the party started!

1222
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:09,063
Where's my liquid courage?

1223
00:44:09,063 --> 00:44:10,731
- What is that smell?

1224
00:44:10,731 --> 00:44:14,652
- Uh, that's tiki juice.
A tiki torch attacked me.

1225
00:44:14,652 --> 00:44:15,944
- Phase two, everybody. Phase two.

1226
00:44:15,944 --> 00:44:17,112
Everybody in the living room.

1227
00:44:17,112 --> 00:44:18,739
- Okay.

1228
00:44:18,739 --> 00:44:21,075
- You're in phase two, Alan.

1229
00:44:22,701 --> 00:44:23,786
Hey babe, I gotta piss,

1230
00:44:23,786 --> 00:44:25,871
but do you have that Future Babies demo?

1231
00:44:25,871 --> 00:44:26,872
- Did you bring it?

1232
00:44:26,872 --> 00:44:27,873
- I told you to bring it.

1233
00:44:27,873 --> 00:44:28,666
- You did?

1234
00:44:28,666 --> 00:44:29,500
- Yeah.

1235
00:44:30,417 --> 00:44:31,251
- I probably did then.

1236
00:44:31,251 --> 00:44:32,544
- Good. We need the slow jams.

1237
00:44:32,544 --> 00:44:34,129
- [Tina] All right.

1238
00:44:42,513 --> 00:44:44,890
- Alan, Todd was just telling me

1239
00:44:44,890 --> 00:44:46,141
how cute he thinks you look tonight.

1240
00:44:46,141 --> 00:44:46,975
- No he wasn't.

1241
00:44:46,975 --> 00:44:48,894
- Those were not his exact words.

1242
00:44:48,894 --> 00:44:51,855
He said, what was it? "Alan is adorable.

1243
00:44:51,855 --> 00:44:53,857
Like a little pig fetus."

1244
00:44:53,857 --> 00:44:54,692
- Can you cut it out?

1245
00:44:54,692 --> 00:44:55,776
Can you stop it? Seriously.

1246
00:44:55,776 --> 00:44:56,985
- [Gordon] That's what he said.

1247
00:44:56,985 --> 00:44:58,445
- Why? I don't even know
where it's coming from.

1248
00:44:58,445 --> 00:44:59,571
- I don't know. Watch your back.

1249
00:44:59,571 --> 00:45:02,449
- Watch? Oh, do you wanna
go outside and step?

1250
00:45:02,449 --> 00:45:03,742
What? What?

1251
00:45:03,742 --> 00:45:04,952
Stop it. Don't support it.

1252
00:45:04,952 --> 00:45:05,869
- I'm not.

1253
00:45:05,869 --> 00:45:06,870
- You are.

1254
00:45:06,870 --> 00:45:09,164
- Bubby, I love you.

1255
00:45:09,164 --> 00:45:11,166
- Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know it.

1256
00:45:11,166 --> 00:45:12,960
- Say you love me. Don't you love me?

1257
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:13,794
Tell me.

1258
00:45:13,794 --> 00:45:15,003
- I love you.
- Are you embarrassed?

1259
00:45:15,003 --> 00:45:16,255
Say it louder. Nobody can hear you.

1260
00:45:16,255 --> 00:45:17,798
- I love you.

1261
00:45:17,798 --> 00:45:19,216
- I love you too.

1262
00:45:27,808 --> 00:45:31,228
- Yasmine, may I suckle on your tootsies?

1263
00:45:34,022 --> 00:45:34,857
- Creepy.

1264
00:45:36,358 --> 00:45:38,652
- Tina, baby. Why aren't
you bumping the FBs?

1265
00:45:38,652 --> 00:45:40,404
- I couldn't find it.

1266
00:45:40,404 --> 00:45:44,199
- Oh, well, we'll talk about that later.

1267
00:45:44,199 --> 00:45:48,704
Everybody, down on the ground.
Phase two Indian style.

1268
00:45:53,333 --> 00:45:55,085
- What happened to phase one?

1269
00:45:55,085 --> 00:45:58,839
- We skipped it. Alan,
you look good tonight.

1270
00:45:58,839 --> 00:46:00,507
Okay, what we're gonna do

1271
00:46:00,507 --> 00:46:02,468
is we're gonna go around in a circle

1272
00:46:02,468 --> 00:46:05,512
and we're gonna say our
least favorite body part.

1273
00:46:05,512 --> 00:46:07,097
- Why would we wanna do that?

1274
00:46:07,097 --> 00:46:08,932
- Alan, come on, man.

1275
00:46:08,932 --> 00:46:10,392
- Fester. Sorry, fester.

1276
00:46:10,392 --> 00:46:12,478
- What? Uncle Fester?

1277
00:46:12,478 --> 00:46:13,729
- We're getting older

1278
00:46:13,729 --> 00:46:16,106
and things may not be
what they used to be.

1279
00:46:16,106 --> 00:46:19,485
We might have some bodily insecurities.

1280
00:46:19,485 --> 00:46:22,905
So let's own up to them.
Let's put them out there.

1281
00:46:22,905 --> 00:46:26,200
That way, when we're naked and fucking,

1282
00:46:26,200 --> 00:46:28,869
we'll be free, we'll be so free.

1283
00:46:30,245 --> 00:46:31,497
- I think that's a good idea, Todd.

1284
00:46:31,497 --> 00:46:33,916
- Thank you. I thought of it.

1285
00:46:33,916 --> 00:46:37,252
All right. First up, Gordonius.

1286
00:46:37,252 --> 00:46:38,337
- Mm.

1287
00:46:38,337 --> 00:46:39,505
Actually you can skip me

1288
00:46:39,505 --> 00:46:40,923
'cause I'm just gonna be taking my penis

1289
00:46:40,923 --> 00:46:42,883
and just sliding it through the pants hole

1290
00:46:42,883 --> 00:46:44,510
and doing what I gotta do.

1291
00:46:44,510 --> 00:46:45,719
- Gordon, be groovy.
- Who's next?

1292
00:46:45,719 --> 00:46:49,681
- Be groovy, remember? Be groovy or leave.

1293
00:46:49,681 --> 00:46:52,851
- All right, fine. You want the truth?

1294
00:46:54,186 --> 00:46:56,480
It's embarrassing. I don't like my penis.

1295
00:46:56,480 --> 00:46:57,314
- Why not?

1296
00:46:57,314 --> 00:46:58,148
- Too big.

1297
00:46:58,148 --> 00:46:58,982
- Oh.

1298
00:46:58,982 --> 00:47:00,025
- It's, I mean, it's really big.

1299
00:47:00,025 --> 00:47:02,986
It's not even fun. It's
cumbersome, it's gigantic.

1300
00:47:02,986 --> 00:47:04,446
- That's awesome.

1301
00:47:04,446 --> 00:47:05,864
- Well, it's awesome sometimes, Todd,

1302
00:47:05,864 --> 00:47:07,491
but basically it's my cross to bear.

1303
00:47:07,491 --> 00:47:09,201
- Don't worry, sweetheart,
I never noticed.

1304
00:47:09,201 --> 00:47:10,744
- Oh, come on, that's not funny.

1305
00:47:10,744 --> 00:47:11,912
She's lying, she's lying.

1306
00:47:11,912 --> 00:47:12,746
- Hey.
- She's lying.

1307
00:47:12,746 --> 00:47:13,956
- Be nice.

1308
00:47:13,956 --> 00:47:16,291
Okay. Rachel, do your worst.

1309
00:47:18,502 --> 00:47:19,920
- My vagina lips.

1310
00:47:22,965 --> 00:47:25,926
They're just, they're too lippy.

1311
00:47:25,926 --> 00:47:26,885
- Does it talk?

1312
00:47:26,885 --> 00:47:27,970
- No, nothing like that.

1313
00:47:27,970 --> 00:47:29,680
It's just, uh, I don't know.

1314
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:33,600
I, I want it more tucked
in. You know, more compact.

1315
00:47:33,600 --> 00:47:35,435
- I have noticed that.

1316
00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:37,855
- It's not like "Night of the Living Dead"

1317
00:47:37,855 --> 00:47:38,814
down there or anything.

1318
00:47:38,814 --> 00:47:41,567
It's, it's just, it's voluptuous.

1319
00:47:42,484 --> 00:47:45,320
It's fine. I'm being stupid.

1320
00:47:45,320 --> 00:47:46,238
You know it's funny though.

1321
00:47:46,238 --> 00:47:50,367
Um, I was at work and I was
looking up on those websites

1322
00:47:50,367 --> 00:47:52,202
about vaginal rejuvenation.

1323
00:47:52,202 --> 00:47:53,620
- I've been on those.

1324
00:47:53,620 --> 00:47:56,707
- Uh, my boss comes up to me
the next day and he's all,

1325
00:47:56,707 --> 00:47:59,418
"Rachel, we are monitoring
all the websites

1326
00:47:59,418 --> 00:48:01,128
that our employees go to."

1327
00:48:01,128 --> 00:48:04,214
And I was like, "Ah! Oh
no, he's looking at me."

1328
00:48:04,214 --> 00:48:06,300
I swear to god, right down there.

1329
00:48:06,300 --> 00:48:08,093
- Like, "Rachel, could
you come into my office

1330
00:48:08,093 --> 00:48:09,761
and remove your pussy lips from my desk?

1331
00:48:09,761 --> 00:48:10,596
Thank you."

1332
00:48:10,596 --> 00:48:13,056
- Precisely. Were you there?

1333
00:48:13,056 --> 00:48:15,225
- That was very brave of you, Rachel.

1334
00:48:15,225 --> 00:48:17,102
- The cat was about to
be out of the bag, so.

1335
00:48:17,102 --> 00:48:17,978
- So to speak.

1336
00:48:17,978 --> 00:48:19,563
- So to speak, yes.

1337
00:48:21,315 --> 00:48:24,359
- All right, well, thank
you. That brings us to Alan.

1338
00:48:24,359 --> 00:48:25,319
- Oh, can I do him?

1339
00:48:25,319 --> 00:48:27,362
- No, this is person specific.

1340
00:48:27,362 --> 00:48:28,363
- I seriously don't spend much time

1341
00:48:28,363 --> 00:48:30,616
thinking about this kinda stuff.

1342
00:48:30,616 --> 00:48:32,659
Truly, I just play the
hand that I was given.

1343
00:48:32,659 --> 00:48:33,493
- Your nipples.

1344
00:48:33,493 --> 00:48:34,328
- What?

1345
00:48:34,328 --> 00:48:35,537
- They look like pepperonis.

1346
00:48:35,537 --> 00:48:39,583
Like big pink, fleshy,
very thick pepperonis.

1347
00:48:39,583 --> 00:48:40,709
- They do not.

1348
00:48:40,709 --> 00:48:43,587
- Face the truth, Alan. Pepperoni nipples.

1349
00:48:43,587 --> 00:48:46,590
- Like little pig noses.
Like a pig fetus nose.

1350
00:48:46,590 --> 00:48:48,342
- Thank you for sharing
that with everybody

1351
00:48:48,342 --> 00:48:49,301
before you shared it with me.

1352
00:48:49,301 --> 00:48:50,594
That's great.
- I didn't know how long

1353
00:48:50,594 --> 00:48:53,221
the whole, you know, play
the hand I was given speech

1354
00:48:53,221 --> 00:48:54,514
was gonna go, so.

1355
00:48:54,514 --> 00:48:55,349
- I was done.

1356
00:48:55,349 --> 00:48:56,183
- [Yasmine] I didn't know.

1357
00:48:56,183 --> 00:48:57,059
- It's okay.
- Okay.

1358
00:48:57,059 --> 00:48:59,311
- My nipples. Todd, you got that?

1359
00:48:59,311 --> 00:49:00,145
- You're gonna go with nipples?

1360
00:49:00,145 --> 00:49:00,979
- [Alan] Yep.

1361
00:49:00,979 --> 00:49:02,898
- All right, we got fat dicks,

1362
00:49:02,898 --> 00:49:06,234
fat pussies, and fat fucking nipples.

1363
00:49:06,234 --> 00:49:07,486
So far so good.

1364
00:49:08,403 --> 00:49:09,571
Whoo! Yasmine.

1365
00:49:10,948 --> 00:49:11,949
- She has a big mole next to her asshole.

1366
00:49:11,949 --> 00:49:12,908
- Alan!
- She does,

1367
00:49:12,908 --> 00:49:13,867
and they're all gonna see it.

1368
00:49:13,867 --> 00:49:14,910
Everyone's gonna see it.
- That is not something

1369
00:49:14,910 --> 00:49:16,203
I ever see or even knew I had.

1370
00:49:16,203 --> 00:49:17,913
And the only reason I did see it

1371
00:49:17,913 --> 00:49:20,457
is because you forced me to
look at it in a fucking mirror.

1372
00:49:20,457 --> 00:49:22,751
- Because it becomes cancerous
if you don't check on it.

1373
00:49:22,751 --> 00:49:23,877
- Cancer ass.

1374
00:49:23,877 --> 00:49:25,504
- It runs in my family.
- A mole by my asshole

1375
00:49:25,504 --> 00:49:27,756
is not something that was
keeping me up at night until now.

1376
00:49:27,756 --> 00:49:29,758
- Alan, I'm glad you
told us. Thank you, Alan.

1377
00:49:29,758 --> 00:49:31,551
Thank you. Cheers.

1378
00:49:31,551 --> 00:49:33,345
I would've thought it was,

1379
00:49:33,345 --> 00:49:34,596
I would've thought it was poop.

1380
00:49:34,596 --> 00:49:37,849
- I'm not talking about this.

1381
00:49:37,849 --> 00:49:40,477
So, Todd, my nose. My snozz.

1382
00:49:40,477 --> 00:49:42,729
It looks like I could
lead the Jews with this.

1383
00:49:42,729 --> 00:49:44,564
- Are your boogers kosher?

1384
00:49:44,564 --> 00:49:46,233
- I don't know. You wanna try them?

1385
00:49:46,233 --> 00:49:47,526
- May I try your feet first?

1386
00:49:47,526 --> 00:49:48,360
- Gross.

1387
00:49:48,360 --> 00:49:50,028
- Okay, so not the mole on your ass,

1388
00:49:50,028 --> 00:49:52,197
but the nose on your face.

1389
00:49:53,865 --> 00:49:55,617
I like it. All right.

1390
00:49:56,868 --> 00:50:00,580
That leads us to Tina.
My beautiful wife, Tina.

1391
00:50:00,580 --> 00:50:04,042
Can you think of anything? Doubt it.

1392
00:50:04,042 --> 00:50:07,963
- Well, I've had kids,
so I have stretch marks.

1393
00:50:09,006 --> 00:50:13,093
And on my stomach and on
my butt and on my boobs.

1394
00:50:14,594 --> 00:50:17,639
And, um, just my boobs just, they like,

1395
00:50:17,639 --> 00:50:18,974
when I bend over, it's like,

1396
00:50:18,974 --> 00:50:22,978
there's like got, it's
like they're scooped out.

1397
00:50:23,979 --> 00:50:26,773
Like they just hang down like, like tubes.

1398
00:50:26,773 --> 00:50:28,859
And it scares me when I look at it.

1399
00:50:28,859 --> 00:50:32,863
I try not to look at it
at all. I don't like it.

1400
00:50:34,156 --> 00:50:36,616
Um, chicken arms.
- No, you don't.

1401
00:50:36,616 --> 00:50:37,909
It doesn't look like that.

1402
00:50:37,909 --> 00:50:39,661
- It's all right. I don't, don't mind.

1403
00:50:39,661 --> 00:50:40,829
That's what I'd say.

1404
00:50:40,829 --> 00:50:41,997
I have the, like-

1405
00:50:41,997 --> 00:50:43,582
- You don't.
- Chicken arms.

1406
00:50:43,582 --> 00:50:47,669
(Tina imitates chicken clucking)

1407
00:50:48,587 --> 00:50:49,755
- That's like four.

1408
00:50:49,755 --> 00:50:51,048
- I guess. Or my hair.

1409
00:50:51,048 --> 00:50:53,967
'Cause I can't do anything
with my hair. I really can't.

1410
00:50:53,967 --> 00:50:58,263
I, I just, I don't know. I
don't know how to fix it.

1411
00:50:58,263 --> 00:51:01,433
Doesn't hold a curl, you know. Um, no.

1412
00:51:03,060 --> 00:51:05,395
Like wrinkles around my eyes.

1413
00:51:05,395 --> 00:51:06,938
Crow's feet, they call them, you know?

1414
00:51:06,938 --> 00:51:09,066
I got those. Right?

1415
00:51:09,066 --> 00:51:10,317
- Right.
- Yeah.

1416
00:51:11,610 --> 00:51:15,363
- And, um, oh, my feet. Duh, my feet.

1417
00:51:15,363 --> 00:51:17,699
That would be it, would be my feet.

1418
00:51:17,699 --> 00:51:18,533
- That's the one, your feet.

1419
00:51:18,533 --> 00:51:19,868
- He's always telling me my feet

1420
00:51:19,868 --> 00:51:22,954
'cause I have feet like a cave woman.

1421
00:51:23,830 --> 00:51:25,999
They're just hard, hard, hard.

1422
00:51:25,999 --> 00:51:28,877
Like you could hear me
walking from down the street.

1423
00:51:28,877 --> 00:51:30,921
- Like a tap dancer. What?

1424
00:51:30,921 --> 00:51:33,757
- Tina, you have beautiful feet.

1425
00:51:33,757 --> 00:51:35,425
- You haven't felt them.

1426
00:51:35,425 --> 00:51:36,968
My thighs are getting really big too.

1427
00:51:36,968 --> 00:51:39,387
- Babe, baby, fuck. Pick one.

1428
00:51:40,263 --> 00:51:42,182
- Well, it's your game.

1429
00:51:43,266 --> 00:51:45,352
- It's not a game. It's a
conversational icebreaker.

1430
00:51:45,352 --> 00:51:46,895
And you're making us all sick.

1431
00:51:46,895 --> 00:51:49,397
- Jesus, Todd. Tina, you're beautiful.

1432
00:51:49,397 --> 00:51:51,817
- You're not making me sick,
Tina. You're turning me on.

1433
00:51:51,817 --> 00:51:53,151
Let me get those feet in my mouth.

1434
00:51:53,151 --> 00:51:56,071
Oh, get it, get it, get it, get it.

1435
00:52:02,536 --> 00:52:05,288
- Okay, Todd, it's your turn.

1436
00:52:05,288 --> 00:52:08,250
So what ghastly delights
do you have under there?

1437
00:52:08,250 --> 00:52:11,169
- Well, I was not trying to skip myself,

1438
00:52:11,169 --> 00:52:12,420
but I have HPV,

1439
00:52:16,591 --> 00:52:18,677
human pampillomavirus.

1440
00:52:18,677 --> 00:52:19,636
- Papilloma.

1441
00:52:19,636 --> 00:52:22,722
- Papilloma's virus. Tina has it too.

1442
00:52:24,182 --> 00:52:28,854
We have it. It's just like a
couple of bumps on my dick.

1443
00:52:29,729 --> 00:52:31,148
- Almost everyone has it.

1444
00:52:31,148 --> 00:52:31,982
- I don't.

1445
00:52:31,982 --> 00:52:33,900
- I do not have a couple
of bumps on my dick.

1446
00:52:33,900 --> 00:52:35,193
- Nope.
- Not me.

1447
00:52:35,193 --> 00:52:38,238
- Really? Because one
in three people have it.

1448
00:52:38,238 --> 00:52:42,242
So one of you or two of
you have gotta be lying.

1449
00:52:43,368 --> 00:52:45,245
- They said they don't have it.

1450
00:52:45,245 --> 00:52:48,373
- You're telling me
that we're 30 years old,

1451
00:52:48,373 --> 00:52:49,749
we've been fucking for 20 years,

1452
00:52:49,749 --> 00:52:51,918
and no one's got HPV in this room?

1453
00:52:51,918 --> 00:52:53,420
- You've been fucking since you were 10?

1454
00:52:53,420 --> 00:52:54,254
- Yeah.

1455
00:52:56,506 --> 00:52:57,465
- I have it.

1456
00:52:57,465 --> 00:52:58,300
- She gave it to me.

1457
00:52:58,300 --> 00:52:59,551
- No, I didn't.

1458
00:53:01,553 --> 00:53:02,554
- I have it.

1459
00:53:05,974 --> 00:53:06,892
- Yeah, I do too,

1460
00:53:06,892 --> 00:53:08,685
but like, I don't have
like herpes or anything.

1461
00:53:08,685 --> 00:53:10,353
- Hey, no one said
anything about that shit.

1462
00:53:10,353 --> 00:53:11,354
- [Alan] No.

1463
00:53:13,106 --> 00:53:14,774
- Whoo! Well, that was fun.

1464
00:53:14,774 --> 00:53:15,609
All right.

1465
00:53:17,861 --> 00:53:19,613
Doesn't everyone feel better now?

1466
00:53:19,613 --> 00:53:22,324
- No.
- More secure, more free?

1467
00:53:22,324 --> 00:53:25,702
All right. Speaking of free, phase three.

1468
00:53:25,702 --> 00:53:27,037
Conversational couple swap.

1469
00:53:27,037 --> 00:53:28,163
This is what we're gonna do.

1470
00:53:28,163 --> 00:53:29,289
Everyone is gonna pair off

1471
00:53:29,289 --> 00:53:31,666
with someone who's not
their significant other.

1472
00:53:31,666 --> 00:53:36,213
Go to a secluded area and
just conversate. 15 minutes.

1473
00:53:36,213 --> 00:53:39,174
No fucking, no sucking, no
ass eating, none of that.

1474
00:53:39,174 --> 00:53:40,050
- [Rachel] All right.

1475
00:53:40,050 --> 00:53:41,301
- All right?

1476
00:53:41,301 --> 00:53:42,177
- Okay.
- Okay.

1477
00:53:42,177 --> 00:53:43,428
- Who wants who?
- Hi, Rachel.

1478
00:53:43,428 --> 00:53:45,931
- I'll have Todd. That's fine.

1479
00:53:47,933 --> 00:53:49,517
- All right. Break.

1480
00:53:58,568 --> 00:53:59,778
- Hey, yo, my man.

1481
00:53:59,778 --> 00:54:00,654
- What's up, dog?

1482
00:54:00,654 --> 00:54:02,530
- Know where Cummings Farm,

1483
00:54:02,530 --> 00:54:04,282
Cummings Ranch or
something like that is at?

1484
00:54:04,282 --> 00:54:05,075
- Cummings Farm?

1485
00:54:05,075 --> 00:54:06,159
- Yeah, that's it.

1486
00:54:06,159 --> 00:54:07,661
- It's right up here on the right.

1487
00:54:07,661 --> 00:54:09,579
About 18, 18 1/2 miles.

1488
00:54:09,579 --> 00:54:11,331
- Cool, I'm going the
right way. All right.

1489
00:54:11,331 --> 00:54:12,290
- You know Old Man Cummings?

1490
00:54:12,290 --> 00:54:14,668
- Yeah, something like that. Yeah, yeah.

1491
00:54:14,668 --> 00:54:15,502
- Man, when I was a kid

1492
00:54:15,502 --> 00:54:16,795
I used to go out there
and pick strawberries

1493
00:54:16,795 --> 00:54:19,256
to stack a little scrilla
during the summer.

1494
00:54:19,256 --> 00:54:20,924
Man, that's a weird dude though.

1495
00:54:20,924 --> 00:54:22,968
He used to pull some old
New Jack City type shit.

1496
00:54:22,968 --> 00:54:23,969
Make you take your shirt off

1497
00:54:23,969 --> 00:54:25,220
when you're out there
picking strawberries,

1498
00:54:25,220 --> 00:54:26,179
you know what I'm saying?

1499
00:54:26,179 --> 00:54:29,266
You'll see the cute little
sign. White, red letters.

1500
00:54:29,266 --> 00:54:30,141
Little strawberries on the side.

1501
00:54:30,141 --> 00:54:32,102
- Yeah, really? So it's 18 miles up there.

1502
00:54:32,102 --> 00:54:34,187
That's cool, man. Thanks.

1503
00:54:35,146 --> 00:54:37,065
- I mean, he didn't even
check your teeth for seeds

1504
00:54:37,065 --> 00:54:38,149
before you left.
- You have a good day.

1505
00:54:38,149 --> 00:54:39,359
All right? Thank you.

1506
00:54:39,359 --> 00:54:40,902
- What you gonna do at Cummings Farm?

1507
00:54:40,902 --> 00:54:42,654
- You take care, man.

1508
00:54:47,075 --> 00:54:49,119
This better be worth my
fucking time, Gordon.

1509
00:54:49,119 --> 00:54:50,453
I'm telling you.

1510
00:54:52,664 --> 00:54:55,750
- This is an interesting first date, huh?

1511
00:54:55,750 --> 00:54:58,878
- Oh, this is a date to you?

1512
00:54:58,878 --> 00:55:00,630
- We could pretend.

1513
00:55:00,630 --> 00:55:02,299
- Okay, it's a date.

1514
00:55:05,343 --> 00:55:07,095
A very romantic date.

1515
00:55:09,139 --> 00:55:10,974
- I usually wait until
at least the fifth date

1516
00:55:10,974 --> 00:55:12,851
to reveal my nipples.

1517
00:55:12,851 --> 00:55:15,270
And then I just reveal one.

1518
00:55:15,270 --> 00:55:16,271
- Good idea.

1519
00:55:17,188 --> 00:55:19,858
You know, 'cause you have
to charm the girl first

1520
00:55:19,858 --> 00:55:22,152
and then bam, whip them out.

1521
00:55:24,779 --> 00:55:28,992
- Was I being charming? I was
trying very hard not to be.

1522
00:55:28,992 --> 00:55:31,661
- Well, maybe you can't help it.

1523
00:55:32,871 --> 00:55:35,248
- I don't think Yasmine
would agree with that.

1524
00:55:35,248 --> 00:55:37,625
- Well, Yasmine don't take any shit.

1525
00:55:37,625 --> 00:55:39,210
- No, she does not.

1526
00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:46,634
That's why I stopped giving
her it a long time ago.

1527
00:55:46,634 --> 00:55:49,304
- You guys sure do bicker a lot.

1528
00:55:50,430 --> 00:55:53,641
I call you two the bicker twins.

1529
00:55:53,641 --> 00:55:55,060
- To whom?

1530
00:55:55,060 --> 00:55:56,061
- To Gordon.

1531
00:55:57,979 --> 00:55:59,564
- Gordon's special.

1532
00:56:02,233 --> 00:56:03,902
- I can never tell when you're kidding.

1533
00:56:03,902 --> 00:56:04,778
- I'm not.

1534
00:56:04,778 --> 00:56:09,240
- Yeah, but you mean special
like retarded special.

1535
00:56:09,240 --> 00:56:10,492
- Maybe.

1536
00:56:10,492 --> 00:56:14,621
- I really wish that you
could see just how he is

1537
00:56:14,621 --> 00:56:17,082
when he's alone with me.

1538
00:56:17,082 --> 00:56:20,168
He's really sweet and he means well,

1539
00:56:20,168 --> 00:56:22,087
it's just the drinking.

1540
00:56:23,630 --> 00:56:25,965
It's gotten worse and worse,

1541
00:56:29,677 --> 00:56:32,222
but he'll work through it.

1542
00:56:32,222 --> 00:56:35,350
- Well, for your sake I hope so.

1543
00:56:35,350 --> 00:56:36,267
You can spend your Saturday nights

1544
00:56:36,267 --> 00:56:38,603
accompanying him to AA meetings.

1545
00:56:38,603 --> 00:56:41,189
You know, really getting
to know his sponsor.

1546
00:56:41,189 --> 00:56:44,734
You look cute standing by your man

1547
00:56:44,734 --> 00:56:47,946
while he drinks endless
cups of black coffee

1548
00:56:47,946 --> 00:56:49,155
and chain smokes cigarettes.

1549
00:56:49,155 --> 00:56:51,491
- Yeah, and you and Yasmine
will be right next door

1550
00:56:51,491 --> 00:56:53,118
at Bickerers Anonymous.

1551
00:56:53,118 --> 00:56:54,577
- What is that? Do they have that?

1552
00:56:54,577 --> 00:56:57,330
- I think they do. You
should look into it.

1553
00:56:57,330 --> 00:56:59,582
- I don't think it'll help.

1554
00:57:00,708 --> 00:57:02,001
I think Yaz and I are on the way out.

1555
00:57:02,001 --> 00:57:03,002
- Shut up.

1556
00:57:03,002 --> 00:57:03,837
- What?

1557
00:57:06,047 --> 00:57:07,424
- You are not gonna flip around tomorrow

1558
00:57:07,424 --> 00:57:09,050
and call her a whore.

1559
00:57:09,050 --> 00:57:10,093
- No, I-
- Don't do that.

1560
00:57:10,093 --> 00:57:14,097
- I, I came here, right,
to Todd's fantasy land.

1561
00:57:15,890 --> 00:57:19,978
- Yes you did. I'm still
surprised you showed up.

1562
00:57:21,771 --> 00:57:23,815
What made you agree to it?

1563
00:57:23,815 --> 00:57:26,401
- Because I'm in love with you.

1564
00:57:29,112 --> 00:57:30,113
I'm kidding.

1565
00:57:32,240 --> 00:57:33,575
- You're a weirdo.

1566
00:57:33,575 --> 00:57:36,828
- And how dismal your
rapid passion heartbeat

1567
00:57:36,828 --> 00:57:41,124
when weighed against the silent
heart of something so pure,

1568
00:57:41,124 --> 00:57:43,710
it deserves to be planted.

1569
00:57:43,710 --> 00:57:46,546
- Oh, that's good. You wrote that?

1570
00:57:46,546 --> 00:57:47,630
- Yes, I did.

1571
00:57:49,215 --> 00:57:51,634
- How'd you memorize all those words?

1572
00:57:51,634 --> 00:57:53,178
- When you write something like a poem

1573
00:57:53,178 --> 00:57:55,305
that means something to you,

1574
00:57:55,305 --> 00:57:57,599
it stays in your heart forever.

1575
00:57:57,599 --> 00:57:59,058
It stays in your bones.

1576
00:57:59,058 --> 00:58:01,311
- Oh, that's so cool.

1577
00:58:01,311 --> 00:58:02,479
- You're cool.

1578
00:58:04,564 --> 00:58:05,398
- Sorry.

1579
00:58:06,774 --> 00:58:08,234
- Hey, you got a record player.

1580
00:58:08,234 --> 00:58:10,278
- [Tina] Yeah, it's Grammy's.

1581
00:58:10,278 --> 00:58:11,529
- Oh, that's great.
- I think she's just got

1582
00:58:11,529 --> 00:58:13,823
like seven classical records in there.

1583
00:58:13,823 --> 00:58:15,325
- Does she like The Beatles?

1584
00:58:15,325 --> 00:58:16,409
- I don't think so.

1585
00:58:16,409 --> 00:58:17,243
- I bet she would.

1586
00:58:17,243 --> 00:58:19,496
You know what, I'm
gonna make her a mix CD.

1587
00:58:19,496 --> 00:58:21,164
Is she still alive?

1588
00:58:21,164 --> 00:58:23,708
- I hope so. She's got my kids.

1589
00:58:25,627 --> 00:58:28,129
(grand music)

1590
00:58:30,840 --> 00:58:32,342
It makes me feel so regal.

1591
00:58:32,342 --> 00:58:34,594
- Yeah, I have that effect
on people sometimes.

1592
00:58:34,594 --> 00:58:37,096
- Not you. The music, dum-dum.

1593
00:58:38,139 --> 00:58:40,225
- Whatever. This is nice.

1594
00:58:42,393 --> 00:58:44,354
I could get used to this.

1595
00:58:44,354 --> 00:58:46,231
This country living.

1596
00:58:46,231 --> 00:58:50,401
I guess your, I guess your
kids must really love it.

1597
00:58:50,401 --> 00:58:53,988
- I don't really wanna talk
about my kids right now.

1598
00:58:53,988 --> 00:58:55,156
- Fair enough.

1599
00:58:58,201 --> 00:59:01,579
Hey, is this place easy to see,
uh, from the road at night?

1600
00:59:01,579 --> 00:59:03,081
- I think so. Why?

1601
00:59:04,123 --> 00:59:06,334
- Oh, no reason. No reason.

1602
00:59:13,299 --> 00:59:15,552
- Aren't we supposed to be talking?

1603
00:59:15,552 --> 00:59:16,594
- I don't have anything to say.

1604
00:59:16,594 --> 00:59:19,430
- Me neither. Keep fucking me.

1605
00:59:19,430 --> 00:59:21,266
- This pussy is primo.

1606
00:59:22,684 --> 00:59:24,769
(animal howling)

1607
00:59:24,769 --> 00:59:27,188
- Did you hear that? Are
there coyotes out here?

1608
00:59:27,188 --> 00:59:30,858
- I don't think so.
Maybe Todd's a werewolf.

1609
00:59:33,987 --> 00:59:34,821
- Maybe.

1610
00:59:36,072 --> 00:59:37,490
(Rachel laughs)

1611
00:59:37,490 --> 00:59:39,784
I'm very taken by you.

1612
00:59:39,784 --> 00:59:42,704
- That's very formal of you to say.

1613
00:59:42,704 --> 00:59:46,666
- May I kiss you? May I
kiss you on the trampoline?

1614
00:59:46,666 --> 00:59:48,876
- I don't think you're supposed to ask.

1615
00:59:48,876 --> 00:59:49,711
- I know.

1616
00:59:50,920 --> 00:59:53,256
I don't know what the boundaries
are at a thing like this.

1617
00:59:53,256 --> 00:59:56,092
- Well, pretty much when
I go through the door,

1618
00:59:56,092 --> 00:59:59,929
I'm gonna leave my boundaries in the dust.

1619
00:59:59,929 --> 01:00:02,515
- So you're really going
through with this, aren't you?

1620
01:00:02,515 --> 01:00:04,350
- Yeah. Right?

1621
01:00:04,350 --> 01:00:05,768
- Right.

1622
01:00:05,768 --> 01:00:06,728
- Uh-oh.

1623
01:00:06,728 --> 01:00:07,520
- What?

1624
01:00:07,520 --> 01:00:09,355
- Are you having second thoughts?

1625
01:00:09,355 --> 01:00:13,860
- Um, I don't know. I've felt
weird ever since I got here.

1626
01:00:13,860 --> 01:00:15,612
Something hasn't felt right.

1627
01:00:15,612 --> 01:00:18,281
- Come on, Alan. Don't wuss out.

1628
01:00:20,700 --> 01:00:23,536
- You're really, it doesn't seem like you.

1629
01:00:23,536 --> 01:00:28,207
- Well, it's like me for
tonight. Look, here's the deal.

1630
01:00:29,959 --> 01:00:33,338
I'm gonna close my eyes
and count to 10, okay?

1631
01:00:33,338 --> 01:00:34,172
- Okay.

1632
01:00:34,172 --> 01:00:36,799
- Okay. When I do that, if
you kiss me before I'm done,

1633
01:00:36,799 --> 01:00:38,343
then I'll know you're in.

1634
01:00:38,343 --> 01:00:39,886
Deal?

1635
01:00:39,886 --> 01:00:41,262
- Deal.
- Okay.

1636
01:00:41,262 --> 01:00:42,722
- Okay.
- Don't make me laugh.

1637
01:00:42,722 --> 01:00:44,432
- I won't.
- Okay.

1638
01:00:44,432 --> 01:00:45,266
- One.

1639
01:00:45,266 --> 01:00:46,726
(Alan laughs)

1640
01:00:46,726 --> 01:00:48,144
- Sorry.

1641
01:00:48,144 --> 01:00:51,773
- Two. Why are you taking so long?

1642
01:00:51,773 --> 01:00:53,191
- I was, I was trying
to get myself together.

1643
01:00:53,191 --> 01:00:54,692
- Yeah, but.

1644
01:00:54,692 --> 01:00:55,526
- I'm, I'm together.

1645
01:00:55,526 --> 01:00:57,028
- Focus.
- Okay.

1646
01:00:57,028 --> 01:00:58,279
- Ready?
- Yes.

1647
01:00:58,279 --> 01:01:00,406
- Composure? Okay.

1648
01:01:00,406 --> 01:01:01,282
- One, two,

1649
01:01:06,371 --> 01:01:07,872
three, four, five.

1650
01:01:11,876 --> 01:01:13,544
- Oh shit. Get down.

1651
01:01:16,255 --> 01:01:17,590
- Did Todd order Thai takeout?

1652
01:01:17,590 --> 01:01:18,841
- I don't know.

1653
01:01:20,551 --> 01:01:22,053
Wait a second. I know that guy.

1654
01:01:22,053 --> 01:01:23,638
Oh my god, I'm serious. I know that guy.

1655
01:01:23,638 --> 01:01:25,598
That's the guy from
outside the liquor store.

1656
01:01:25,598 --> 01:01:27,392
He's some stupid guy who
asked us to buy drugs

1657
01:01:27,392 --> 01:01:29,310
and I didn't know what to say,
so I said something stupid,

1658
01:01:29,310 --> 01:01:30,937
and now he followed us
all the way up here.

1659
01:01:30,937 --> 01:01:31,771
- Are you fucking with me?

1660
01:01:31,771 --> 01:01:32,605
- I'm not fucking with you.

1661
01:01:32,605 --> 01:01:34,107
That guy followed us here
from the liquor store

1662
01:01:34,107 --> 01:01:35,483
and he came here just to kill you and me.

1663
01:01:35,483 --> 01:01:36,317
Come on.
- What? No.

1664
01:01:36,317 --> 01:01:39,946
- Come, come, come. We
gotta warn everybody.

1665
01:01:40,780 --> 01:01:42,198
Go, go. Ah, fuck.

1666
01:01:44,575 --> 01:01:46,911
Okay, turn off the lights
and get down on the ground.

1667
01:01:46,911 --> 01:01:48,454
Yasmine, Yasmine.

1668
01:01:48,454 --> 01:01:50,581
Danger. Yasmine.

1669
01:01:50,581 --> 01:01:52,083
- Who's out there?

1670
01:01:52,083 --> 01:01:55,670
- Believe me, you don't want
to know. Ignorance is bliss.

1671
01:01:55,670 --> 01:01:57,088
Yasmine. Yasmine.

1672
01:01:59,674 --> 01:02:01,634
- Hey, Alan, man, that was not 15 minutes.

1673
01:02:01,634 --> 01:02:02,677
- Everybody get down.

1674
01:02:02,677 --> 01:02:04,053
- Alan, what the fuck?

1675
01:02:04,053 --> 01:02:05,972
- Get down on the ground.

1676
01:02:05,972 --> 01:02:07,557
- Way to take charge, Alan. I like it.

1677
01:02:07,557 --> 01:02:08,725
- Are you having a panic attack?

1678
01:02:08,725 --> 01:02:09,559
- The drug dealer.

1679
01:02:09,559 --> 01:02:10,393
The one from the liquor store

1680
01:02:10,393 --> 01:02:12,353
that you wanted me to
read to from the Torah.

1681
01:02:12,353 --> 01:02:13,187
- You were gonna what?

1682
01:02:13,187 --> 01:02:14,772
- Shush. The big scary Black guy.

1683
01:02:14,772 --> 01:02:15,982
Wait, what were you two doing back there?

1684
01:02:15,982 --> 01:02:17,316
- Alan, big scary Black guy?

1685
01:02:17,316 --> 01:02:19,652
- Yes. He followed me here, he's outside.

1686
01:02:19,652 --> 01:02:21,154
He wants to do god knows what to the men

1687
01:02:21,154 --> 01:02:22,238
and then kill all the women.

1688
01:02:22,238 --> 01:02:23,656
- Alan, you allowed
yourself to be followed?

1689
01:02:23,656 --> 01:02:25,032
- I didn't allow myself to be followed.

1690
01:02:25,032 --> 01:02:26,284
I just fucking came here.

1691
01:02:26,284 --> 01:02:27,785
- Fuck. Let me think.

1692
01:02:27,785 --> 01:02:28,911
Okay, what are his demands?

1693
01:02:28,911 --> 01:02:30,663
- I don't know. We didn't have a sit down.

1694
01:02:30,663 --> 01:02:31,706
I just came in here.

1695
01:02:31,706 --> 01:02:32,749
- You just came in here?
- Yes.

1696
01:02:32,749 --> 01:02:34,250
- Why didn't you go to the
two-foot pocket on the driveway

1697
01:02:34,250 --> 01:02:35,334
and fucking call the po-po?

1698
01:02:35,334 --> 01:02:36,252
Faced east.

1699
01:02:36,252 --> 01:02:37,295
- And tilted your head back.

1700
01:02:37,295 --> 01:02:39,714
- What? I don't know what I'm doing.

1701
01:02:39,714 --> 01:02:41,299
I thought I was being a hero.

1702
01:02:41,299 --> 01:02:43,176
- We're sitting ducks in here.

1703
01:02:43,176 --> 01:02:45,344
Goddamn it, Todd. I told
you this was a stupid idea.

1704
01:02:45,344 --> 01:02:46,554
- Tina, shut the fuck up.

1705
01:02:46,554 --> 01:02:51,476
- Hey everyone, just calm
down. Maybe he'll just leave.

1706
01:02:51,476 --> 01:02:52,769
- Gordon. You in there, man?

1707
01:02:52,769 --> 01:02:53,895
- He knows our name.

1708
01:02:53,895 --> 01:02:56,606
- No, he said Gordon.
He just wants Gordon.

1709
01:02:56,606 --> 01:02:57,732
Let's give him to him.

1710
01:02:57,732 --> 01:02:59,025
- Okay.
- About time.

1711
01:02:59,025 --> 01:03:01,402
- Gordon. Gordon, wake up.

1712
01:03:01,402 --> 01:03:02,320
- Oh, babe.

1713
01:03:03,321 --> 01:03:04,572
Hey, baby. How was the orgy?

1714
01:03:04,572 --> 01:03:07,533
- It's on hold. There's someone
outside looking for you.

1715
01:03:07,533 --> 01:03:09,786
- Well, thank god. Well,
why didn't you let him in?

1716
01:03:09,786 --> 01:03:12,288
- Gordon, did you invite
a Black man to my home?

1717
01:03:12,288 --> 01:03:13,498
- Gordon, what did you do?

1718
01:03:13,498 --> 01:03:15,875
- Relax. Everybody calm the fuck down.

1719
01:03:15,875 --> 01:03:19,420
I have the situation under control.

1720
01:03:19,420 --> 01:03:20,963
It's my friend Larenz
and he's totally cool.

1721
01:03:20,963 --> 01:03:24,050
You guys are actually gonna
really dig him. Yo, Larenz.

1722
01:03:24,050 --> 01:03:25,676
- [Larenz] What?

1723
01:03:25,676 --> 01:03:26,552
- You're cool, right?

1724
01:03:26,552 --> 01:03:28,471
- [Larenz] I can be.

1725
01:03:28,471 --> 01:03:29,972
- See? Come in.

1726
01:03:29,972 --> 01:03:30,807
- No!

1727
01:03:32,058 --> 01:03:32,975
- What the fuck?

1728
01:03:32,975 --> 01:03:35,478
I didn't realize this
was a segregated orgy.

1729
01:03:35,478 --> 01:03:38,439
- Fuck that shit, Gordo. You
know it's not a race thing.

1730
01:03:38,439 --> 01:03:41,025
My homeboy Tran from work? He
would love to have been here.

1731
01:03:41,025 --> 01:03:42,068
He's Chinese, man.

1732
01:03:42,068 --> 01:03:44,487
But it was invite only.
Just supposed to be us six.

1733
01:03:44,487 --> 01:03:45,738
Three cunts and three cocks.

1734
01:03:45,738 --> 01:03:47,448
- Okay, so what do you want
me to do? Tell him to leave?

1735
01:03:47,448 --> 01:03:49,784
- Yeah, get him outta here.
But let him down easy.

1736
01:03:49,784 --> 01:03:51,828
I don't want any static.

1737
01:03:51,828 --> 01:03:53,579
Maybe give him some of those
fresh picked strawberries

1738
01:03:53,579 --> 01:03:54,705
as a piece offering.

1739
01:03:54,705 --> 01:03:56,457
- They like watermelon, Todd.

1740
01:03:56,457 --> 01:03:57,750
- Fruit is fruit, Tina.

1741
01:03:57,750 --> 01:03:58,668
- I'll tell him to leave.

1742
01:03:58,668 --> 01:04:01,712
- He just drove 25, 30 minutes
tops out to the country,

1743
01:04:01,712 --> 01:04:03,548
middle of fucking
nowhere to do me a favor.

1744
01:04:03,548 --> 01:04:04,841
And I'm gonna just go ask him to leave

1745
01:04:04,841 --> 01:04:09,345
because his kind isn't welcome
here at Cummings Ranch.

1746
01:04:14,433 --> 01:04:15,268
Hey buddy.

1747
01:04:16,936 --> 01:04:19,647
- What's the deal, Gordon?

1748
01:04:19,647 --> 01:04:23,025
- I may have made a
tiny error in judgment.

1749
01:04:23,025 --> 01:04:24,777
- You think?

1750
01:04:24,777 --> 01:04:26,320
I mean, you made me all these promises

1751
01:04:26,320 --> 01:04:29,115
and it's like they didn't
know what's coming, man.

1752
01:04:29,115 --> 01:04:30,867
- Sorry, man. I thought they'd be cool.

1753
01:04:30,867 --> 01:04:34,495
And when I told them what you
did, they just flipped out,

1754
01:04:34,495 --> 01:04:36,038
and you know, I couldn't get ahold of you.

1755
01:04:36,038 --> 01:04:37,206
No cell phone reception.

1756
01:04:37,206 --> 01:04:40,126
And I, I thought they'd
be more open-minded.

1757
01:04:40,126 --> 01:04:41,586
They flipped, man. I'm sorry.

1758
01:04:41,586 --> 01:04:42,420
I'm really fucking sorry.

1759
01:04:42,420 --> 01:04:44,255
- Well, you being really
sorry's not gonna get me,

1760
01:04:44,255 --> 01:04:45,965
how'd you call them again?

1761
01:04:45,965 --> 01:04:50,428
Three sexually liberated
white women, is it now?

1762
01:04:50,428 --> 01:04:53,264
- I know that my apology
is a small consolation.

1763
01:04:53,264 --> 01:04:54,765
- Oh, microscopic.

1764
01:04:57,977 --> 01:05:00,187
- Okay, I have an idea.

1765
01:05:00,187 --> 01:05:03,566
- Great. Another idea from Gordon.

1766
01:05:03,566 --> 01:05:06,152
- Let's go for a walk. Come on.

1767
01:05:10,781 --> 01:05:13,868
I need you to gimme the drugs.

1768
01:05:13,868 --> 01:05:16,287
Larenz, I need you to
gimme the drugs, man.

1769
01:05:16,287 --> 01:05:17,079
- Are you crazy?

1770
01:05:17,079 --> 01:05:18,831
You think you're gonna get
that drugs from me now?

1771
01:05:18,831 --> 01:05:22,418
- Okay. I have a plan, but
you need to give me the drugs.

1772
01:05:22,418 --> 01:05:23,252
- You're tripping.

1773
01:05:23,252 --> 01:05:27,256
- No, just, just listen
to me. This is perfect.

1774
01:05:27,256 --> 01:05:29,342
You give me six E's.

1775
01:05:29,342 --> 01:05:31,052
- They're X.

1776
01:05:31,052 --> 01:05:32,720
- No, actually, they go by E now.

1777
01:05:32,720 --> 01:05:34,055
- No, actually, I'm selling them.

1778
01:05:34,055 --> 01:05:37,099
They could be whatever letter
I want them to be. They're X.

1779
01:05:37,099 --> 01:05:38,267
- They are X. You're right.

1780
01:05:38,267 --> 01:05:40,019
I was wrong. They're X.

1781
01:05:40,019 --> 01:05:43,356
You gimme six X, you
drive away, park your car.

1782
01:05:43,356 --> 01:05:46,734
Wait a little bit. I'm gonna
go feed them to the ladies.

1783
01:05:46,734 --> 01:05:50,071
It's gonna be like a sexual tornado

1784
01:05:50,071 --> 01:05:51,614
with the skin and hair and tits.

1785
01:05:51,614 --> 01:05:54,533
- I got, I got it. Yeah, I, I got it.

1786
01:05:54,533 --> 01:05:56,243
- You're gonna just kind of slink in

1787
01:05:56,243 --> 01:05:59,246
and assimilate with everybody else.

1788
01:05:59,246 --> 01:06:01,123
Before they even know what's happened,

1789
01:06:01,123 --> 01:06:03,751
you've already busted your nut.

1790
01:06:03,751 --> 01:06:05,920
You're in, man. Game over.

1791
01:06:09,423 --> 01:06:10,633
- I don't know, man.

1792
01:06:10,633 --> 01:06:12,969
- Larenz. What, what do you want, man?

1793
01:06:12,969 --> 01:06:15,763
What's the other option?
You wanna go in now?

1794
01:06:15,763 --> 01:06:18,891
They're fucking freaked out.
They're nervous as hell.

1795
01:06:18,891 --> 01:06:22,269
What, you wanna just go in there
and whip out your big cock?

1796
01:06:22,269 --> 01:06:23,604
- How do you know I got a big cock?

1797
01:06:23,604 --> 01:06:25,940
- Huh? I'm guessing.

1798
01:06:25,940 --> 01:06:27,817
- That's some racist shit, Gordon.

1799
01:06:27,817 --> 01:06:30,528
For all you know, I could
have a small Chinese dick.

1800
01:06:30,528 --> 01:06:32,363
I don't, but I could.

1801
01:06:32,363 --> 01:06:35,700
- Fair enough. You know what
bitches are like on ecstasy.

1802
01:06:35,700 --> 01:06:37,159
You do know that, Larenz.

1803
01:06:37,159 --> 01:06:37,994
- I do.

1804
01:06:37,994 --> 01:06:39,954
- They're like fucking sex zombies.

1805
01:06:39,954 --> 01:06:42,248
They're fucking hungry for
it. It's all they want.

1806
01:06:42,248 --> 01:06:43,666
Anyway, you gotta take one too.

1807
01:06:43,666 --> 01:06:44,750
- Come on, you know I don't do that.

1808
01:06:44,750 --> 01:06:46,002
- I know you don't usually do it,

1809
01:06:46,002 --> 01:06:48,087
but I know you're gonna do it tonight.

1810
01:06:48,087 --> 01:06:51,674
Hello, look around you. This
is a fucking orgy, man, okay?

1811
01:06:51,674 --> 01:06:52,800
If ever an occasion,

1812
01:06:52,800 --> 01:06:56,554
if ever an occasion called for
it, Larenz, this is it, man.

1813
01:06:56,554 --> 01:06:57,805
You have to be on the same level

1814
01:06:57,805 --> 01:07:01,392
as me and the fucking sex
zombies out there, right?

1815
01:07:01,392 --> 01:07:03,811
You have to. We all gotta
be on the same page.

1816
01:07:03,811 --> 01:07:06,397
That's the only way this works.

1817
01:07:08,691 --> 01:07:09,567
- I, I, I don't know.

1818
01:07:09,567 --> 01:07:11,277
I guess if it's gonna get
me six titties in my mouth,

1819
01:07:11,277 --> 01:07:13,529
then I guess so, man.

1820
01:07:13,529 --> 01:07:14,989
- This is terrific.

1821
01:07:14,989 --> 01:07:16,240
By the time this thing is done,

1822
01:07:16,240 --> 01:07:19,076
you'll have lost more
sperm than spinal fluid.

1823
01:07:19,076 --> 01:07:19,910
Do you know what I mean?

1824
01:07:19,910 --> 01:07:21,662
- What the hell does that mean?

1825
01:07:21,662 --> 01:07:23,289
- You got anything to take that with?

1826
01:07:23,289 --> 01:07:25,624
- The diet Pepsi in the car.

1827
01:07:26,625 --> 01:07:28,335
- You guys, it's a lot
worse than I thought.

1828
01:07:28,335 --> 01:07:30,004
Stay down. It's bad.

1829
01:07:33,674 --> 01:07:37,094
Trick or treat? Let me suck on your feet.

1830
01:07:39,638 --> 01:07:41,474
I'll give you a treat.

1831
01:07:42,516 --> 01:07:43,851
- Gordon, who was that?

1832
01:07:43,851 --> 01:07:44,935
- That was Larenz, baby,

1833
01:07:44,935 --> 01:07:46,145
- And how do you know him?

1834
01:07:46,145 --> 01:07:47,104
- Oh, how do I know him?

1835
01:07:47,104 --> 01:07:47,938
I know him 'cause he's the guy

1836
01:07:47,938 --> 01:07:49,523
that just brought us the party favors

1837
01:07:49,523 --> 01:07:53,277
that are gonna turn
this party upside down.

1838
01:07:53,277 --> 01:07:54,695
Love this record.

1839
01:07:59,408 --> 01:08:01,410
It was a surprise, guys.

1840
01:08:02,244 --> 01:08:05,539
Obviously, in retrospect, I
should have told you about it.

1841
01:08:05,539 --> 01:08:09,001
I guess alcohol does impair
my judgment, after all.

1842
01:08:09,001 --> 01:08:10,461
You were right. Put it on the list.

1843
01:08:10,461 --> 01:08:12,463
- It's already going on there, thank you.

1844
01:08:12,463 --> 01:08:13,547
- Is he gone?

1845
01:08:14,757 --> 01:08:16,300
- Yes, Tina. He is gone.

1846
01:08:16,300 --> 01:08:17,134
- Are you sure?

1847
01:08:17,134 --> 01:08:18,385
- Yeah, Alan, I'm sure.

1848
01:08:18,385 --> 01:08:19,303
- Did that Black man leave?

1849
01:08:19,303 --> 01:08:20,137
- Yeah.

1850
01:08:20,137 --> 01:08:21,472
- He's gone. He drove away.

1851
01:08:21,472 --> 01:08:23,307
Everybody take a deep breath.

1852
01:08:23,307 --> 01:08:25,851
See, he understood the situation
in here. I just told him.

1853
01:08:25,851 --> 01:08:28,979
I told him how it was, and unfortunately,

1854
01:08:28,979 --> 01:08:33,984
my friend Larenz faces this
kind of adversity all the time.

1855
01:08:34,485 --> 01:08:39,490
Unfortunately, he's used to
this crap, so he's cool with it.

1856
01:08:39,615 --> 01:08:43,285
Like I said. Now stick
out your little paws.

1857
01:08:48,374 --> 01:08:52,711
Oh, come on guys. You're
not still mad at me, right?

1858
01:08:54,380 --> 01:08:58,592
Nothing says I'm sorry
like free pharmaceuticals.

1859
01:08:58,592 --> 01:09:01,846
There you go. One for you, one for you.

1860
01:09:05,224 --> 01:09:08,185
Alan, body of Christ.
Ami mo mea, take one.

1861
01:09:08,185 --> 01:09:10,104
Here, put in your hand.

1862
01:09:18,195 --> 01:09:21,490
Tina, don't worry. Grandma has the kids.

1863
01:09:21,490 --> 01:09:22,616
It's fine.

1864
01:09:22,616 --> 01:09:23,450
- Is it?

1865
01:09:23,450 --> 01:09:25,703
- Don't worry about what it is.

1866
01:09:25,703 --> 01:09:26,662
You don't think about it.

1867
01:09:26,662 --> 01:09:29,081
The time for thinking is
over. No more thinking.

1868
01:09:29,081 --> 01:09:30,916
- No problem. No thinking.

1869
01:09:30,916 --> 01:09:32,334
- Wait, can we drink with this?

1870
01:09:32,334 --> 01:09:34,795
- You can do whatever you want with that.

1871
01:09:34,795 --> 01:09:38,465
It's the next, next
level. It's phase 1,000.

1872
01:09:39,425 --> 01:09:40,759
- This is ecstasy, isn't it?

1873
01:09:40,759 --> 01:09:42,136
- I don't know, Alan, are you a chemist?

1874
01:09:42,136 --> 01:09:44,805
Would you like a microscope?
Just take the fucking pill.

1875
01:09:44,805 --> 01:09:46,932
- Ecstasy. Awesome, Gordon.

1876
01:09:46,932 --> 01:09:49,476
Ecstasy for the ecstasy. Take it, Tina.

1877
01:09:49,476 --> 01:09:52,855
- Thank you, Todd. Glad somebody
gets what's going on here.

1878
01:09:52,855 --> 01:09:55,649
Rachel, take that pill. Just take it.

1879
01:09:55,649 --> 01:10:00,154
Alan, Alan, you wanna get
in her pants? Take the pill.

1880
01:10:00,154 --> 01:10:05,159
Take the pill if you wanna
get in her pants. Thank you.

1881
01:10:05,326 --> 01:10:06,869
Now there's only one
more thing you gotta do

1882
01:10:06,869 --> 01:10:08,412
and everybody's gotta do it.

1883
01:10:08,412 --> 01:10:09,246
- Any.

1884
01:10:10,581 --> 01:10:13,000
- You all gotta fucking howl.

1885
01:10:15,711 --> 01:10:18,881
(howls) Like that. Okay?

1886
01:10:18,881 --> 01:10:19,715
Howl.

1887
01:10:20,674 --> 01:10:23,177
(group howls)

1888
01:10:24,261 --> 01:10:26,138
I can't hear you. I can't hear any of you.

1889
01:10:26,138 --> 01:10:27,264
I can't hear you.

1890
01:10:27,264 --> 01:10:29,767
(group howls)

1891
01:10:32,603 --> 01:10:35,940
(dramatic music swells)

1892
01:10:42,488 --> 01:10:46,033
(dramatic music continues)

1893
01:10:52,039 --> 01:10:54,708
(group howling)

1894
01:11:01,465 --> 01:11:03,926
(eerie music)

1895
01:11:10,182 --> 01:11:12,851
(group howling)

1896
01:11:17,856 --> 01:11:19,733
- This shit's retarded.

1897
01:11:19,733 --> 01:11:21,986
- Those are sensitive.

1898
01:11:21,986 --> 01:11:23,320
- Come on, feet.

1899
01:11:24,655 --> 01:11:25,656
Feet are everything.

1900
01:11:25,656 --> 01:11:29,076
That's what makes us technically animals.

1901
01:11:30,828 --> 01:11:33,289
We walk on them. We walk on our feet.

1902
01:11:33,289 --> 01:11:34,581
We walk on our feet!

1903
01:11:34,581 --> 01:11:35,416
- Are you okay?

1904
01:11:35,416 --> 01:11:37,209
- Yeah, I'm fucking great.

1905
01:11:37,209 --> 01:11:38,252
I'm serious. It's really good.

1906
01:11:38,252 --> 01:11:39,503
I'm really good.

1907
01:11:39,503 --> 01:11:42,506
- What more could you ask for? Whoo!

1908
01:11:44,049 --> 01:11:45,676
- Stop here, stop.

1909
01:11:45,676 --> 01:11:47,136
- [Tina] Careful, careful!

1910
01:11:47,136 --> 01:11:48,512
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

1911
01:11:48,512 --> 01:11:50,306
What? She's got a head.

1912
01:11:50,306 --> 01:11:52,182
- She runs with the guns over your head.

1913
01:11:52,182 --> 01:11:53,517
- Oh, I wanna show you
the Future Baby steps

1914
01:11:53,517 --> 01:11:56,854
that they were showing me earlier.

1915
01:11:56,854 --> 01:11:57,730
Whoo!

1916
01:11:57,730 --> 01:12:00,149
- Wow! Whoo!
- Wicked dad Todd.

1917
01:12:00,149 --> 01:12:02,067
- [Yasmine] Yeah!

1918
01:12:02,067 --> 01:12:03,402
- It's, I think I did it backwards, but.

1919
01:12:03,402 --> 01:12:04,778
- That was good.
- I like-

1920
01:12:04,778 --> 01:12:08,949
- Rachel, Rachel! I'm
leaving you for Tina's feet.

1921
01:12:15,164 --> 01:12:16,874
Oh, this is hilarious.

1922
01:12:16,874 --> 01:12:18,834
- [Tina] Ooh, oh, Rachel, that's good.

1923
01:12:18,834 --> 01:12:20,252
- [Gordon] You like that?

1924
01:12:20,252 --> 01:12:21,086
- [Yasmine] She does have nice feet.

1925
01:12:21,086 --> 01:12:23,839
- Ooh, blow on my eyes. Blow on my eyes.

1926
01:12:23,839 --> 01:12:26,050
Oh, that's amazing.

1927
01:12:26,050 --> 01:12:30,387
- That's kind of gay, but
I'm not gonna say nothing.

1928
01:12:35,934 --> 01:12:39,271
- This is crazy. Smelling feet and shit.

1929
01:12:44,735 --> 01:12:49,531
No, I'm not rolling, but you
sure the fuck are rolling.

1930
01:12:49,531 --> 01:12:51,617
What? Fine, I'll take it.

1931
01:12:56,955 --> 01:12:57,790
Happy now?

1932
01:12:58,665 --> 01:13:02,669
That's disgusting. Your
tongue's gonna fall off.

1933
01:13:08,550 --> 01:13:11,303
(birds chirping)

1934
01:13:13,680 --> 01:13:16,266
- But I was always an alto,
but I wanted to be a soprano

1935
01:13:16,266 --> 01:13:19,436
because altos always just
could boom, boom, boom.

1936
01:13:19,436 --> 01:13:21,230
And sopranos get to sing
the most beautiful parts,

1937
01:13:21,230 --> 01:13:23,315
like the harmony, not even the melody.

1938
01:13:23,315 --> 01:13:25,567
So I worked on my range the whole year.

1939
01:13:25,567 --> 01:13:27,736
Then we did Silent Night
for a Christmas concert,

1940
01:13:27,736 --> 01:13:30,072
and I gotta sing this solo.

1941
01:13:30,072 --> 01:13:30,989
And I was so proud of myself.

1942
01:13:30,989 --> 01:13:33,242
- Your mustache is like
seven different colors.

1943
01:13:33,242 --> 01:13:34,576
- I know.

1944
01:13:34,576 --> 01:13:35,744
- That scares me.

1945
01:13:35,744 --> 01:13:37,704
- It's penetration time.

1946
01:13:37,704 --> 01:13:38,747
- Huh?

1947
01:13:38,747 --> 01:13:40,624
- It's penetration time.

1948
01:13:40,624 --> 01:13:41,875
It's penetration time!

1949
01:13:41,875 --> 01:13:44,420
- It's penetration time.

1950
01:13:44,420 --> 01:13:46,588
- Time for the main event.

1951
01:13:49,258 --> 01:13:52,386
No one wanted any pizza.
Who's the first to go?

1952
01:13:52,386 --> 01:13:55,556
Who wants up here? Baby, you wanna go?

1953
01:13:56,432 --> 01:13:57,766
Come here, baby.

1954
01:14:00,144 --> 01:14:02,104
Come on, the table's secure, baby.

1955
01:14:02,104 --> 01:14:03,981
Did you know that the
clitoris's only function

1956
01:14:03,981 --> 01:14:05,524
is to give pleasure?

1957
01:14:05,524 --> 01:14:07,734
It's like a little pink
button on a woman's body.

1958
01:14:07,734 --> 01:14:09,361
You just press it and they go, "Hehe."

1959
01:14:09,361 --> 01:14:10,362
Like that, remember that little thing,

1960
01:14:10,362 --> 01:14:11,738
that little thing made out of dough?

1961
01:14:11,738 --> 01:14:13,031
And you press it and it goes, "Hehe."

1962
01:14:13,031 --> 01:14:13,866
That's the same with a girl.

1963
01:14:13,866 --> 01:14:15,033
You press it and she goes, "Hehe."

1964
01:14:15,033 --> 01:14:16,452
What's those countries
where they clit the off?

1965
01:14:16,452 --> 01:14:17,286
- Oh, Todd. Come on.

1966
01:14:17,286 --> 01:14:19,288
- You know, baby, like
those clitorodectomies?

1967
01:14:19,288 --> 01:14:21,373
Think about the landfills
in those countries.

1968
01:14:21,373 --> 01:14:24,293
Just fucking mountains
of clits in the trash.

1969
01:14:24,293 --> 01:14:25,961
Gordon, can you fly a helicopter?

1970
01:14:25,961 --> 01:14:28,755
We could fly right over and I
could jump right down into it.

1971
01:14:28,755 --> 01:14:30,174
And on the way down, I could just be like,

1972
01:14:30,174 --> 01:14:31,717
"La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la."

1973
01:14:31,717 --> 01:14:35,304
I'll be stashing them
in my fucking pocket.

1974
01:14:36,430 --> 01:14:38,891
Oh shit. Okay, let me come around.

1975
01:14:38,891 --> 01:14:41,727
Okay. Beep, beep, beep, beep.

1976
01:14:41,727 --> 01:14:44,062
Okay, all right. What do we got here?

1977
01:14:44,062 --> 01:14:47,024
That's better for me, baby.
Oh, we gotta get these off.

1978
01:14:47,024 --> 01:14:48,942
We can't have these on.

1979
01:14:51,445 --> 01:14:52,905
Oh, skin the cat.

1980
01:14:52,905 --> 01:14:55,324
All right, will you hold
onto to those? Thank you.

1981
01:14:55,324 --> 01:14:57,659
Do not lose those. Those are my favorite.

1982
01:14:57,659 --> 01:15:00,954
Oh baby. Oh, it's so beautiful.

1983
01:15:00,954 --> 01:15:02,331
That is so beautiful.

1984
01:15:02,331 --> 01:15:03,290
- Yeah. Is it?

1985
01:15:03,290 --> 01:15:04,124
- Think about it.

1986
01:15:04,124 --> 01:15:05,000
I jizz in there

1987
01:15:05,000 --> 01:15:06,543
and then Scotty and
Erica crawl out of there.

1988
01:15:06,543 --> 01:15:07,669
- Oh, Todd, no.

1989
01:15:07,669 --> 01:15:09,463
- [Todd] And now they can walk.

1990
01:15:09,463 --> 01:15:10,297
- Stop.

1991
01:15:10,297 --> 01:15:13,884
- How cool is that? Alan, first up to bat.

1992
01:15:13,884 --> 01:15:14,801
Come here. Drop trow.

1993
01:15:14,801 --> 01:15:16,094
- No, I should drink some water.

1994
01:15:16,094 --> 01:15:17,721
- Fuck water. Come on, man.

1995
01:15:17,721 --> 01:15:19,056
- No, Tina, don't you want some water?

1996
01:15:19,056 --> 01:15:20,098
- No, I'm good.

1997
01:15:20,098 --> 01:15:21,308
- Hey, no more talking

1998
01:15:21,308 --> 01:15:23,477
unless it's with your penis or your pussy.

1999
01:15:23,477 --> 01:15:24,478
All right, baby?

2000
01:15:24,478 --> 01:15:25,562
Who wants it? Who wants it?

2001
01:15:25,562 --> 01:15:26,563
Gordo. Come here, man.

2002
01:15:26,563 --> 01:15:29,107
Are you here to fuck or are
you here to drink water?

2003
01:15:29,107 --> 01:15:32,569
- I'm here to fucking drink.
I'm here to fuck and drink.

2004
01:15:32,569 --> 01:15:34,863
- Perfect. Get up there.

2005
01:15:34,863 --> 01:15:36,573
Here it is, it's cool. It's cool.

2006
01:15:36,573 --> 01:15:37,407
- Okay.

2007
01:15:37,407 --> 01:15:38,534
- All right, baby.
- All right.

2008
01:15:38,534 --> 01:15:39,368
- [Todd] Are you all right for that?

2009
01:15:39,368 --> 01:15:40,661
- You love me?
- Oh, baby, I love you.

2010
01:15:40,661 --> 01:15:42,162
I love you. You okay, you comfortable?

2011
01:15:42,162 --> 01:15:43,664
- Todd, uh, protection?

2012
01:15:43,664 --> 01:15:44,623
- You don't need any protection.

2013
01:15:44,623 --> 01:15:46,208
You're not gonna give her
anything I haven't already.

2014
01:15:46,208 --> 01:15:47,167
Right, baby?

2015
01:15:47,167 --> 01:15:49,044
- Oh, okay. What about pregnant?

2016
01:15:49,044 --> 01:15:50,921
I, uh, I can't afford any little Scotties

2017
01:15:50,921 --> 01:15:51,755
or Stevies or whatever.
- Oh no,

2018
01:15:51,755 --> 01:15:52,965
Teeny's got her tubes tied.

2019
01:15:52,965 --> 01:15:55,425
Remember that, baby? Remember
when they tied your tubes?

2020
01:15:55,425 --> 01:15:58,929
- Okay, okay. Let's just back
it up, back it up, back it up.

2021
01:15:58,929 --> 01:16:00,389
Here we go.

2022
01:16:00,389 --> 01:16:01,348
- Lemme know if it hurts.

2023
01:16:01,348 --> 01:16:02,224
- You're not gonna hurt her.

2024
01:16:02,224 --> 01:16:03,100
She's had human beings come out of there.

2025
01:16:03,100 --> 01:16:04,851
- It's big. Hold on, let me just get it.

2026
01:16:04,851 --> 01:16:05,811
- Um, in a nice way.

2027
01:16:05,811 --> 01:16:06,645
- [Gordon] And...

2028
01:16:06,645 --> 01:16:08,480
- Baby, you look so sexy.

2029
01:16:08,480 --> 01:16:09,523
- Ah, I'm in.

2030
01:16:10,732 --> 01:16:11,984
- Are you in there?
- It's in, guys.

2031
01:16:11,984 --> 01:16:14,361
- All right. Does that feel good, baby?

2032
01:16:14,361 --> 01:16:15,279
- [Tina] I don't know.

2033
01:16:15,279 --> 01:16:16,113
- [Todd] Does that feel good?

2034
01:16:16,113 --> 01:16:18,031
- [Gordon] Oh, that's good. It's good.

2035
01:16:18,031 --> 01:16:19,491
Todd, it's good. It is really good.

2036
01:16:19,491 --> 01:16:21,785
- Do your, do your Lamaze breathing.

2037
01:16:21,785 --> 01:16:23,203
- [Gordon] Oh, that's good.

2038
01:16:23,203 --> 01:16:25,372
- That's good. Somebody sit on her face.

2039
01:16:25,372 --> 01:16:26,415
- No.
- What?

2040
01:16:26,415 --> 01:16:27,624
- No, I don't...
- Oh fuck.

2041
01:16:27,624 --> 01:16:29,293
- I don't...
- I'm getting close.

2042
01:16:29,293 --> 01:16:31,086
Tina, you getting close?
- Stop, stop, stop.

2043
01:16:31,086 --> 01:16:32,170
Stop now. Stop.
- Don't stop.

2044
01:16:32,170 --> 01:16:33,088
She says that all the time.

2045
01:16:33,088 --> 01:16:34,006
- No stop. I really wanna-

2046
01:16:34,006 --> 01:16:35,757
- Stop, she said fucking stop!

2047
01:16:35,757 --> 01:16:37,175
- She didn't say stop.
- I'm almost done.

2048
01:16:37,175 --> 01:16:38,010
I'm gonna cum.
- Gordon, fucking stop!

2049
01:16:38,010 --> 01:16:38,885
- Okay, I'm almost done. Just give me-

2050
01:16:38,885 --> 01:16:39,720
- Pull out. Gordon!

2051
01:16:39,720 --> 01:16:40,679
- Okay, fine!

2052
01:16:40,679 --> 01:16:42,014
- Oh shit! Whoa!

2053
01:16:43,181 --> 01:16:45,475
- Oh, sweetie. Did you come, baby?

2054
01:16:45,475 --> 01:16:47,853
- Get the fuck away from me.

2055
01:16:47,853 --> 01:16:51,648
- [Gordon] Fuck. Did she come, Todd?

2056
01:16:51,648 --> 01:16:52,816
- [Todd] It's all good, Teeny.

2057
01:16:52,816 --> 01:16:54,484
- Oh my god, it's the fucking drug dealer.

2058
01:16:54,484 --> 01:16:57,070
You let him out there?
Alan, go do something.

2059
01:16:57,070 --> 01:16:58,822
He's been-
- Larenz!

2060
01:16:58,822 --> 01:16:59,906
- He's been standing out
there the whole fucking time.

2061
01:16:59,906 --> 01:17:02,284
- Alan, he's got a gun,
so just be careful. Baby.

2062
01:17:02,284 --> 01:17:05,203
- I don't, don't touch me.
- Please.

2063
01:17:08,749 --> 01:17:10,459
We can go home, we'll put on that nice,

2064
01:17:10,459 --> 01:17:11,627
that nice CD you like

2065
01:17:11,627 --> 01:17:12,919
that I made you for
your birthday last year,

2066
01:17:12,919 --> 01:17:14,379
and we'll just lay in
bed till the sun comes up

2067
01:17:14,379 --> 01:17:15,672
and watch the sun come up.

2068
01:17:15,672 --> 01:17:17,966
Baby, this was a dumb
idea. This was stupid.

2069
01:17:17,966 --> 01:17:20,802
Let's just get outta here.
These people are crazy.

2070
01:17:20,802 --> 01:17:21,845
And you just hallucinated

2071
01:17:21,845 --> 01:17:23,347
'cause of the pills that I gave you.

2072
01:17:23,347 --> 01:17:25,474
And that's my fault. Alcohol
impairs your judgment.

2073
01:17:25,474 --> 01:17:27,225
It's on the list. I'm
not drinking anymore.

2074
01:17:27,225 --> 01:17:28,435
I'm done drinking. Remember?

2075
01:17:28,435 --> 01:17:30,520
I was only doing it 'cause
the event that was coming up

2076
01:17:30,520 --> 01:17:31,396
and I was gonna quit.

2077
01:17:31,396 --> 01:17:32,773
I'm done. I'm done.

2078
01:17:32,773 --> 01:17:33,607
- Shut up!

2079
01:17:41,865 --> 01:17:44,868
(wildlife croaking)

2080
01:17:51,833 --> 01:17:54,836
(wildlife croaking)

2081
01:18:01,760 --> 01:18:04,763
(wildlife croaking)

2082
01:18:11,645 --> 01:18:12,479
- Ah! Oh.

2083
01:18:21,571 --> 01:18:22,572
- It might be the ecstasy,

2084
01:18:22,572 --> 01:18:25,951
but I think I can feel your
sperm swimming into my brain.

2085
01:18:25,951 --> 01:18:28,120
- Well, tell your brain
I'll pay for the abortion.

2086
01:18:28,120 --> 01:18:30,580
Major party foul, Gordo.

2087
01:18:30,580 --> 01:18:32,916
What part of her tubes are
tied did you not understand?

2088
01:18:32,916 --> 01:18:34,418
- Just the part where
everyone was screaming at me

2089
01:18:34,418 --> 01:18:36,336
to stop fucking your wife.

2090
01:18:36,336 --> 01:18:38,672
- It's okay. I think we've
learned a lot though.

2091
01:18:38,672 --> 01:18:40,632
Next time you creampie her.

2092
01:18:40,632 --> 01:18:44,302
Next time, fucking creampie the bitch.

2093
01:18:44,302 --> 01:18:45,512
- I can't find him anywhere,

2094
01:18:45,512 --> 01:18:47,389
and I went looking everywhere I could.

2095
01:18:47,389 --> 01:18:48,932
I don't know what you want from me.

2096
01:18:48,932 --> 01:18:50,350
I don't think he's coming back, honestly.

2097
01:18:50,350 --> 01:18:55,063
After what he saw through the
Venetian blinds, would you?

2098
01:18:55,063 --> 01:18:56,648
What? What did I miss?

2099
01:18:56,648 --> 01:18:59,609
- Hey, wait a minute. Where's Tina?

2100
01:18:59,609 --> 01:19:01,111
- She ran to the bathroom.

2101
01:19:01,111 --> 01:19:04,197
- The bathroom? Fuck that shit.

2102
01:19:04,197 --> 01:19:06,074
- Todd, just leave her alone.

2103
01:19:06,074 --> 01:19:08,326
- Why don't you mind your
own beeswax, beautiful?

2104
01:19:08,326 --> 01:19:10,704
When I come back, you're gonna get fucked.

2105
01:19:10,704 --> 01:19:12,414
- Yeah, good luck with that.

2106
01:19:12,414 --> 01:19:14,082
- Not gonna need it.

2107
01:19:16,209 --> 01:19:18,044
Hey baby, the door's
locked. I can't get it open.

2108
01:19:18,044 --> 01:19:19,087
- Go away.

2109
01:19:19,087 --> 01:19:22,382
- I don't have to go away.
You're my wife, it's my right.

2110
01:19:22,382 --> 01:19:25,135
- It's my door. Leave me alone.

2111
01:19:25,135 --> 01:19:27,929
- Tina, I'm not gonna talk to
you through this fucking door.

2112
01:19:27,929 --> 01:19:28,805
Open it.

2113
01:19:28,805 --> 01:19:31,349
- The orgy's over, Todd.
Send everyone home.

2114
01:19:31,349 --> 01:19:34,478
- Baby, the orgy's over
when I say the orgy's over.

2115
01:19:34,478 --> 01:19:37,355
That was a hell of a
performance out there, baby.

2116
01:19:37,355 --> 01:19:38,982
Everyone's out there talking about it.

2117
01:19:38,982 --> 01:19:40,400
Everyone's cock is rock hard.

2118
01:19:40,400 --> 01:19:41,902
The pussies are fucking
dripping through the couch.

2119
01:19:41,902 --> 01:19:43,945
- Ew!
- You gotta see this, baby.

2120
01:19:43,945 --> 01:19:46,281
Come on. Don't turn back now.

2121
01:19:46,281 --> 01:19:47,449
- No, go away.

2122
01:19:48,325 --> 01:19:51,953
- Tina, open the door. Open the door!

2123
01:19:51,953 --> 01:19:55,957
Open the door! Open the
door, you fucking cunt!

2124
01:19:55,957 --> 01:19:57,501
- You think you're scaring me?

2125
01:19:57,501 --> 01:19:59,711
I'm a cunt, Todd? I'm a cunt?

2126
01:19:59,711 --> 01:20:02,255
- Baby, I'm kidding. I was just kidding.

2127
01:20:02,255 --> 01:20:03,423
- Fuck you, Todd. Fuck you.

2128
01:20:03,423 --> 01:20:05,050
Don't.
- Baby, you never know when I-

2129
01:20:05,050 --> 01:20:06,843
- You have cum on your face.

2130
01:20:06,843 --> 01:20:09,012
- It's Gordon. It's just Gordon.

2131
01:20:09,012 --> 01:20:11,014
- Send everyone home.

2132
01:20:11,014 --> 01:20:11,848
- Look...

2133
01:20:11,848 --> 01:20:15,227
- Send everyone home. It's over.

2134
01:20:15,227 --> 01:20:16,311
- I'm not gonna do that.

2135
01:20:16,311 --> 01:20:18,271
- I will then.

2136
01:20:18,271 --> 01:20:21,399
- Okay, all right. Well
you just fucked yourself.

2137
01:20:21,399 --> 01:20:23,652
Divorce. Woop, there it is.

2138
01:20:24,653 --> 01:20:27,364
- We're gonna go. But
thank you for a great time.

2139
01:20:27,364 --> 01:20:28,365
And for the pizza.
- Hey, are you okay?

2140
01:20:28,365 --> 01:20:30,200
- Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine.

2141
01:20:30,200 --> 01:20:33,161
I just, I think I just
wanna be alone right now.

2142
01:20:33,161 --> 01:20:35,121
If you guys could just like maybe take off

2143
01:20:35,121 --> 01:20:37,249
for a little while and take Todd with you.

2144
01:20:37,249 --> 01:20:40,210
- No. We want to, but we can't take Todd.

2145
01:20:40,210 --> 01:20:42,212
He should be here with you, I think.

2146
01:20:42,212 --> 01:20:46,174
And there's that guy.
LaVar is still out there.

2147
01:20:46,174 --> 01:20:48,260
We don't know where, and it's dark.

2148
01:20:48,260 --> 01:20:49,261
- I can handle myself.

2149
01:20:49,261 --> 01:20:51,346
- Really, Alan? You really
don't know his name?

2150
01:20:51,346 --> 01:20:53,431
I said it like a hundred
times. It's Larenz.

2151
01:20:53,431 --> 01:20:55,725
He's a cool cat. He does
not present a threat to you.

2152
01:20:55,725 --> 01:20:57,519
- Okay, everybody just
go. Just leave, okay?

2153
01:20:57,519 --> 01:20:59,396
I really, I would rather that you just go.

2154
01:20:59,396 --> 01:21:02,232
I'll call you tomorrow. I promise, I will.

2155
01:21:02,232 --> 01:21:06,653
- Might be tricky leaving.
Might be really tricky.

2156
01:21:06,653 --> 01:21:07,487
- How's that?

2157
01:21:07,487 --> 01:21:09,364
- I disabled the motor vehicles.

2158
01:21:09,364 --> 01:21:10,198
- You did what?

2159
01:21:10,198 --> 01:21:13,618
- I thought something like this
might happen. You pussy out.

2160
01:21:13,618 --> 01:21:14,786
You little bitches.

2161
01:21:14,786 --> 01:21:16,913
So while you guys were in
here not making mojitos,

2162
01:21:16,913 --> 01:21:19,082
I just went to your cars
and opened the hoods

2163
01:21:19,082 --> 01:21:20,333
and I fucked shit up.

2164
01:21:20,333 --> 01:21:24,504
- I think I saw you do that.
I should have said something.

2165
01:21:24,504 --> 01:21:26,298
- That's why you had the
gasoline on your shirt.

2166
01:21:26,298 --> 01:21:27,132
- Yeah, Alan.

2167
01:21:27,132 --> 01:21:29,009
That's why I had the fucking
gasoline on my shirt.

2168
01:21:29,009 --> 01:21:30,886
- This is crazy.

2169
01:21:30,886 --> 01:21:31,720
- You're insane.

2170
01:21:31,720 --> 01:21:32,554
- Insane?
- Yeah.

2171
01:21:32,554 --> 01:21:34,055
- No, I'm just really horny.

2172
01:21:34,055 --> 01:21:36,600
Now he fucked my wife and
I want what's coming to me.

2173
01:21:36,600 --> 01:21:38,560
I want what was promised. Where were we?

2174
01:21:38,560 --> 01:21:40,103
Rachel, how about you pull
out your fat pussy lips?

2175
01:21:40,103 --> 01:21:40,937
Come here.

2176
01:21:40,937 --> 01:21:42,981
- Don't do that. Don't be a dick!

2177
01:21:42,981 --> 01:21:44,900
Everybody to the chill out tent right now.

2178
01:21:44,900 --> 01:21:45,734
- Only two people.

2179
01:21:45,734 --> 01:21:47,152
- Fuck you, Todd. Fuck you.

2180
01:21:47,152 --> 01:21:48,486
- Hey, hey, hey.
- Get outta my house.

2181
01:21:48,486 --> 01:21:50,405
- I'm gonna sue you,
Tina. I'm gonna sue you.

2182
01:21:50,405 --> 01:21:51,281
- I barely fucked your wife.

2183
01:21:51,281 --> 01:21:53,325
- Get the fuck outta
here, you drunk faggot.

2184
01:21:53,325 --> 01:21:56,828
Faggot, faggot, faggots, faggots, faggots!

2185
01:21:58,747 --> 01:22:02,083
You had a chance of something beautiful!

2186
01:22:07,380 --> 01:22:10,842
- Oh, well that could have gotten ugly.

2187
01:22:10,842 --> 01:22:12,719
Good thing I stepped in when I did.

2188
01:22:12,719 --> 01:22:15,305
- Yeah. And basically raped Tina.

2189
01:22:15,305 --> 01:22:18,099
- What? I did not rape Tina.

2190
01:22:18,099 --> 01:22:18,975
Tina, did I rape you?

2191
01:22:18,975 --> 01:22:20,810
- No, nobody raped anybody.

2192
01:22:20,810 --> 01:22:23,563
- Todd raped me with your dick.

2193
01:22:23,563 --> 01:22:25,065
- See, Todd raped her.

2194
01:22:25,065 --> 01:22:26,232
- Yeah, with your dick.

2195
01:22:26,232 --> 01:22:27,692
- Oh, whatever. Fuck you.

2196
01:22:27,692 --> 01:22:29,694
You dragged me to this thing.

2197
01:22:29,694 --> 01:22:31,363
- It wasn't supposed to be like this.

2198
01:22:31,363 --> 01:22:33,531
- Yeah, well, you know
what? It was like this.

2199
01:22:33,531 --> 01:22:35,867
And I don't even know why I'm
in this tent with you guys.

2200
01:22:35,867 --> 01:22:36,910
I'm gonna ride back with Larenz.

2201
01:22:36,910 --> 01:22:37,744
- No, don't go. No, here.

2202
01:22:37,744 --> 01:22:39,871
- Larenz. Hey, hey, hey, off the pants!

2203
01:22:39,871 --> 01:22:42,082
- Sorry.
- Do not rip my new pants.

2204
01:22:42,082 --> 01:22:43,166
- I won't touch the pants.

2205
01:22:43,166 --> 01:22:44,000
- Larenz!

2206
01:22:44,000 --> 01:22:44,834
- Larenz isn't here.

2207
01:22:44,834 --> 01:22:46,294
Come on. Hang out.

2208
01:22:46,294 --> 01:22:48,755
We all need to just calm down

2209
01:22:48,755 --> 01:22:51,424
and wait a couple hours
till we're not so fucked up.

2210
01:22:51,424 --> 01:22:53,468
And then we'll call a
tow truck in the morning.

2211
01:22:53,468 --> 01:22:55,220
- Alan, I am fine.

2212
01:22:55,220 --> 01:22:57,806
- You are so not fine.

2213
01:22:57,806 --> 01:22:59,474
- You know what?

2214
01:22:59,474 --> 01:23:01,434
I'm gonna go on record right now

2215
01:23:01,434 --> 01:23:04,854
and say that tonight
fucking sucked, all right?

2216
01:23:04,854 --> 01:23:07,983
And now I have that thing
where I had to pee, but I came.

2217
01:23:07,983 --> 01:23:10,694
Now my pee and my cum are
all mixed up in my dick.

2218
01:23:10,694 --> 01:23:13,530
I have to pee and I can't, and it hurts.

2219
01:23:13,530 --> 01:23:16,700
That's where I'm, that's where I'm at.

2220
01:23:19,577 --> 01:23:23,081
- You slept with Todd, didn't you?

2221
01:23:23,081 --> 01:23:24,124
- I did.

2222
01:23:24,124 --> 01:23:29,087
- During talking time. That
wasn't the rules, Yasmine.

2223
01:23:29,087 --> 01:23:31,423
- It is what it is.

2224
01:23:31,423 --> 01:23:34,217
Can we just figure out
what's going on and move on?

2225
01:23:34,217 --> 01:23:35,468
Can we do that?

2226
01:23:36,386 --> 01:23:40,265
- You. Can't believe I ever
thought you were my friend.

2227
01:23:40,265 --> 01:23:42,976
- Oh fuck, don't be so
fucking melodramatic.

2228
01:23:42,976 --> 01:23:45,520
It's just a dick and
pussy. Who gives a shit?

2229
01:23:45,520 --> 01:23:47,814
- Hey, that's the first insightful
thing she said all night.

2230
01:23:47,814 --> 01:23:50,066
- Gordon, shut the fuck up!

2231
01:23:53,278 --> 01:23:55,447
- I'm in love with Rachel.

2232
01:23:56,656 --> 01:23:57,615
- Duh.

2233
01:23:57,615 --> 01:23:59,117
- Rachel, I'm in love with you.

2234
01:23:59,117 --> 01:24:00,368
- Dude, you're rolling.

2235
01:24:00,368 --> 01:24:02,537
- I'm not rolling.

2236
01:24:02,537 --> 01:24:04,497
Okay, I am. I really, really am.

2237
01:24:04,497 --> 01:24:05,373
But that doesn't matter.

2238
01:24:05,373 --> 01:24:06,958
Rachel, I love you and
I wanna be with you.

2239
01:24:06,958 --> 01:24:09,044
And I think we should be together forever.

2240
01:24:09,044 --> 01:24:10,670
I'm serious, when we're
done with this thing,

2241
01:24:10,670 --> 01:24:11,921
I want it to be just you and me.

2242
01:24:11,921 --> 01:24:14,507
Please, can we do that? Please?

2243
01:24:18,136 --> 01:24:19,637
Please?
- Alan.

2244
01:24:19,637 --> 01:24:20,472
- What?

2245
01:24:21,890 --> 01:24:23,224
- You little shit.

2246
01:24:23,224 --> 01:24:24,684
- Are you, are you
being serious right now?

2247
01:24:24,684 --> 01:24:27,520
- Rachel, how do you feel about me?

2248
01:24:27,520 --> 01:24:28,938
- I...

2249
01:24:28,938 --> 01:24:30,356
- Rachel. Rachel.

2250
01:24:33,318 --> 01:24:34,569
- Ah, it's Larenz.
- Oh my god.

2251
01:24:34,569 --> 01:24:35,653
- It's Larenz. Oh my god.

2252
01:24:35,653 --> 01:24:36,488
- Is it Larenz?

2253
01:24:36,488 --> 01:24:37,322
- Yes.
- Great.

2254
01:24:37,322 --> 01:24:41,618
Larenz, please take me
away from these fucks.

2255
01:24:41,618 --> 01:24:43,286
Ow. It's not Larenz.

2256
01:24:45,747 --> 01:24:49,667
It's Todd. He's serving
tennis balls at us.

2257
01:24:49,667 --> 01:24:51,586
- Fuck you, Todd!

2258
01:24:51,586 --> 01:24:53,004
- Fuck you, Tina!

2259
01:24:57,217 --> 01:24:59,594
- Well, you gotta admit
his accuracy is stunning.

2260
01:24:59,594 --> 01:25:01,179
- He played in college.

2261
01:25:01,179 --> 01:25:03,598
- And fuck you, Rachel.
And fuck you, Alan.

2262
01:25:03,598 --> 01:25:04,891
And fuck you, Gordon.

2263
01:25:04,891 --> 01:25:06,851
- What did I do?

2264
01:25:06,851 --> 01:25:10,939
- And fuck you, Yasmine.
Oh, wait, I already did.

2265
01:25:16,236 --> 01:25:19,280
Now I'm gonna go make
myself a goddamn mojito.

2266
01:25:19,280 --> 01:25:21,741
- There's no mint, motherfucker!

2267
01:25:21,741 --> 01:25:24,077
- I'll use toothpaste, Tina!

2268
01:25:26,412 --> 01:25:29,415
- Well, I think that was the climax.

2269
01:25:29,415 --> 01:25:31,209
- Was it the-
- No, just stop it.

2270
01:25:31,209 --> 01:25:32,961
Stop it. Oh, stop it.

2271
01:25:33,920 --> 01:25:35,421
- Stop!
- Oh Jesus.

2272
01:25:37,799 --> 01:25:39,425
- Where the fuck do
you think you're going?

2273
01:25:39,425 --> 01:25:41,803
- I'm gonna go hang out
with the normal guy, honey.

2274
01:25:41,803 --> 01:25:43,721
Take care of four eyes.

2275
01:25:44,681 --> 01:25:45,515
- Honey, you okay?

2276
01:25:45,515 --> 01:25:47,267
- Yeah. No, I'm cool.

2277
01:25:47,267 --> 01:25:49,060
- I'm so sorry.
- I'm totally cool.

2278
01:25:49,060 --> 01:25:49,853
- I've never seen him hit a man before.

2279
01:25:49,853 --> 01:25:51,521
- Ah, be cool.

2280
01:25:51,521 --> 01:25:53,148
Okay, I'm fine.
- I'm so sorry.

2281
01:25:53,148 --> 01:25:54,023
- No, it's just sometimes

2282
01:25:54,023 --> 01:25:55,275
when I get punched in the face, I cry.

2283
01:25:55,275 --> 01:25:57,110
It's like a stupid thing.

2284
01:25:57,110 --> 01:25:57,944
- Ugh, fuck.

2285
01:25:57,944 --> 01:26:00,196
- Would you guys please just
shut up. Shut the fuck up.

2286
01:26:00,196 --> 01:26:02,699
You talk so goddamn much. Huh?

2287
01:26:04,284 --> 01:26:06,327
- [Rachel] What a mess.

2288
01:26:06,327 --> 01:26:07,120
- God!

2289
01:26:07,120 --> 01:26:11,040
- Not that bad. Maybe
we'll get some ice on it.

2290
01:26:12,458 --> 01:26:14,210
- I want Alan out of the tent.

2291
01:26:14,210 --> 01:26:16,921
- I think maybe you're
overreacting just a little bit.

2292
01:26:16,921 --> 01:26:19,591
- No, no, no man allowed. Out of the tent.

2293
01:26:19,591 --> 01:26:20,425
- Tina, come on.

2294
01:26:20,425 --> 01:26:21,801
- Out.

2295
01:26:21,801 --> 01:26:25,221
- Get the fuck out of the tent.

2296
01:26:25,221 --> 01:26:26,681
- Get out!

2297
01:26:26,681 --> 01:26:28,683
- I'm sorry.
- No, no, no.

2298
01:26:28,683 --> 01:26:29,517
- Sorry.

2299
01:26:39,903 --> 01:26:41,154
- Oh, hi.
- Hey.

2300
01:26:42,655 --> 01:26:44,115
- You scared me.

2301
01:26:44,115 --> 01:26:47,535
- You wanna make me one of those?

2302
01:26:47,535 --> 01:26:48,369
- Sure.

2303
01:26:52,832 --> 01:26:55,418
(somber music)

2304
01:27:02,634 --> 01:27:05,803
(somber music swells)

2305
01:27:12,143 --> 01:27:15,563
(somber music continues)

2306
01:27:21,694 --> 01:27:25,114
(somber music continues)

2307
01:27:28,534 --> 01:27:29,369
- Fuck.

2308
01:27:34,499 --> 01:27:35,333
Hmm.

2309
01:27:45,134 --> 01:27:45,969
Ah.

2310
01:27:50,306 --> 01:27:51,140
Ugh.

2311
01:28:00,191 --> 01:28:02,860
(bird chirping)

2312
01:28:08,283 --> 01:28:10,952
(bird chirping)

2313
01:28:13,913 --> 01:28:15,248
- Hi.

2314
01:28:15,248 --> 01:28:16,082
- Hey.

2315
01:28:21,546 --> 01:28:24,799
- I'm sorry I said what I said last night.

2316
01:28:24,799 --> 01:28:25,800
- It's okay.

2317
01:28:30,388 --> 01:28:32,640
Telling me you wanted to be my boyfriend

2318
01:28:32,640 --> 01:28:35,059
in front of my boyfriend
and your girlfriend

2319
01:28:35,059 --> 01:28:37,478
in that chill out tent in Cummings Farm.

2320
01:28:37,478 --> 01:28:39,314
Not that romantic.

2321
01:28:39,314 --> 01:28:41,816
- Well, seeing as how you had
just watched your boyfriend

2322
01:28:41,816 --> 01:28:43,693
bop Tina in front of you,

2323
01:28:43,693 --> 01:28:45,528
and my girlfriend was
screwing Todd in the back,

2324
01:28:45,528 --> 01:28:48,656
I thought, you know, in
comparison, it was pretty minor.

2325
01:28:48,656 --> 01:28:49,490
- Yeah.

2326
01:28:50,366 --> 01:28:54,120
Did you agree to come here to all of this

2327
01:28:54,120 --> 01:28:56,873
just to tell me you loved me?

2328
01:28:56,873 --> 01:28:57,707
- No.

2329
01:29:00,543 --> 01:29:02,962
- You could have just texted.

2330
01:29:10,511 --> 01:29:12,055
- What are you doing?

2331
01:29:12,055 --> 01:29:15,308
- Go back to sleep. It's a surprise.

2332
01:29:15,308 --> 01:29:17,727
- I can't sleep anymore.

2333
01:29:17,727 --> 01:29:20,021
- I'm decorating your room with balloons.

2334
01:29:20,021 --> 01:29:22,106
- Why are you doing that?

2335
01:29:25,985 --> 01:29:27,653
- Because I'm sorry.

2336
01:29:29,822 --> 01:29:33,242
I just, I just don't want you to hate me.

2337
01:29:35,620 --> 01:29:37,205
- I don't hate you.

2338
01:29:42,085 --> 01:29:43,086
- You don't?

2339
01:29:44,629 --> 01:29:48,716
- I always wished I
could be more like you.

2340
01:29:48,716 --> 01:29:51,302
You know, you have style.

2341
01:29:51,302 --> 01:29:55,264
You know how to have fun.
You know, you're cool.

2342
01:29:55,264 --> 01:29:56,974
I don't know how to do that.

2343
01:29:56,974 --> 01:30:00,353
I don't know, I don't
know how to have fun.

2344
01:30:00,353 --> 01:30:03,314
- Well, I can't do what you do.

2345
01:30:03,314 --> 01:30:05,024
- What do I do?

2346
01:30:05,024 --> 01:30:07,276
- Like, you're like a real mom.

2347
01:30:07,276 --> 01:30:09,112
I, I can't even take care of myself.

2348
01:30:09,112 --> 01:30:11,531
I'm like a grown woman child.

2349
01:30:14,325 --> 01:30:16,244
Like, I would be a horrible mom.

2350
01:30:16,244 --> 01:30:18,079
- Oh no, you wouldn't.

2351
01:30:19,288 --> 01:30:22,959
- You're an amazing
mom. I, I just, I can't.

2352
01:30:22,959 --> 01:30:25,002
- Do you really? You really think so?

2353
01:30:25,002 --> 01:30:25,837
- I do.

2354
01:30:27,171 --> 01:30:29,757
- Thank you. It's all right.

2355
01:30:29,757 --> 01:30:31,426
It's not us anyway. It's them.

2356
01:30:31,426 --> 01:30:34,595
- It is them. And fucking Rachel.

2357
01:30:34,595 --> 01:30:35,972
The whole fucking time.

2358
01:30:35,972 --> 01:30:39,308
She was with him the whole fucking time.

2359
01:30:40,268 --> 01:30:42,520
- She's thought she was
so adorable last night.

2360
01:30:42,520 --> 01:30:43,646
- Ugh.

2361
01:30:43,646 --> 01:30:45,481
- "Ha, ha, ha." I hate her face.

2362
01:30:45,481 --> 01:30:49,485
- I do too. Just like,
"Can you see my nipples?"

2363
01:30:52,613 --> 01:30:54,574
I knew she had those big vag lips too.

2364
01:30:54,574 --> 01:30:56,451
I've seen them before, I just
didn't wanna say anything.

2365
01:30:56,451 --> 01:30:57,577
- She's hideous.

2366
01:30:57,577 --> 01:30:58,411
- Agreed.

2367
01:31:01,456 --> 01:31:04,542
- I really, I feel like my mouth is numb

2368
01:31:04,542 --> 01:31:06,794
from this, um, Nonoxynol-9.

2369
01:31:10,548 --> 01:31:11,382
- Ew. Ew!

2370
01:31:20,349 --> 01:31:23,102
(birds chirping)

2371
01:31:30,401 --> 01:31:33,154
(birds chirping)

2372
01:31:34,655 --> 01:31:36,240
- You made waffles.

2373
01:31:39,744 --> 01:31:41,412
You make any for me?

2374
01:31:47,168 --> 01:31:48,836
Where are the girls?

2375
01:31:55,009 --> 01:31:56,427
Are you hungover?

2376
01:31:57,512 --> 01:32:01,849
Why aren't you saying
anything? You lost your voice?

2377
01:32:02,725 --> 01:32:07,647
- No, we took a vow of silence
last night. I'm honoring it.

2378
01:32:09,815 --> 01:32:13,319
- Right. I'm gonna have to renege on that.

2379
01:32:15,029 --> 01:32:17,448
But you know what? Good luck.

2380
01:32:21,619 --> 01:32:22,703
Fuck you too.

2381
01:32:31,504 --> 01:32:34,090
(Gordon sighs)

2382
01:32:41,013 --> 01:32:44,100
Alan, you know what? She's all yours.

2383
01:32:45,560 --> 01:32:49,313
I fucked her like a thousand
times. I'm done with her.

2384
01:32:49,313 --> 01:32:50,982
See you later, babe.

2385
01:32:55,736 --> 01:32:59,490
Ladies, I'm taking the
orgy back to my place.

2386
01:33:03,995 --> 01:33:06,747
(birds chirping)

2387
01:33:10,293 --> 01:33:12,795
(phone beeps)

2388
01:33:14,463 --> 01:33:15,715
Larenz? Larenz.

2389
01:33:22,013 --> 01:33:25,057
What the fuck, man? How
many tabs did you take?

2390
01:33:25,057 --> 01:33:26,559
Wake up. Wake up, Lorenz.

2391
01:33:26,559 --> 01:33:27,935
- Ah.
- What the fuck?

2392
01:33:27,935 --> 01:33:30,271
Oh shit. You all right?

2393
01:33:30,271 --> 01:33:32,481
- You're gay.
- What?

2394
01:33:32,481 --> 01:33:35,109
- I seen you come in a guy's face.

2395
01:33:35,109 --> 01:33:38,404
You was dancing with feathers.
You all looked weird and gay.

2396
01:33:38,404 --> 01:33:39,530
- I'm not fucking gay, man.

2397
01:33:39,530 --> 01:33:41,741
- Whatever. Get me outta here, man.

2398
01:33:41,741 --> 01:33:43,868
- This fucking orgy
sucked, man. It was a dud.

2399
01:33:43,868 --> 01:33:44,994
A wet fucking firecracker.

2400
01:33:44,994 --> 01:33:46,829
- I don't care about the fucking orgy.

2401
01:33:46,829 --> 01:33:48,831
- You know the fucking
women? They all wimped out.

2402
01:33:48,831 --> 01:33:50,416
They fucking freaked
out and then the guys,

2403
01:33:50,416 --> 01:33:52,877
they all went crazy.
- Ask me if I give a fuck.

2404
01:33:52,877 --> 01:33:54,879
Just get me outta here, man.

2405
01:33:54,879 --> 01:33:55,713
- Fine, fine.

2406
01:33:55,713 --> 01:33:57,006
I'm just, I just thought you'd wanna know

2407
01:33:57,006 --> 01:33:57,840
you didn't miss anything.

2408
01:33:57,840 --> 01:33:58,758
I thought it'd make you feel better.

2409
01:33:58,758 --> 01:34:00,217
_ I would feel better if I
wasn't laying on the ground

2410
01:34:00,217 --> 01:34:02,094
with a broken foot and my head banged up.

2411
01:34:02,094 --> 01:34:02,928
How about that?

2412
01:34:02,928 --> 01:34:04,263
- Is this a gun?

2413
01:34:08,434 --> 01:34:10,978
(gun fires)

2414
01:34:10,978 --> 01:34:13,481
(dog barking)

2415
01:34:19,070 --> 01:34:21,989
- Whoever wants to leave, come now.

2416
01:34:27,286 --> 01:34:29,622
(rap music)

2417
01:34:34,210 --> 01:34:35,628
- Who is this?
- What?

2418
01:34:35,628 --> 01:34:38,964
- I'm not talking to you, Alan. Lovert.

2419
01:34:38,964 --> 01:34:40,299
- Larenz, bro.

2420
01:34:40,299 --> 01:34:41,133
- Who is this?

2421
01:34:41,133 --> 01:34:42,301
- The Shit.

2422
01:34:42,301 --> 01:34:43,844
- Yeah, I know it's the
shit, but who is this?

2423
01:34:43,844 --> 01:34:45,638
- No, no, that's the name of the group.

2424
01:34:45,638 --> 01:34:47,473
The Shit. They're homeboys of mine.

2425
01:34:47,473 --> 01:34:50,226
This is their demo. I'm
the executive producer.

2426
01:34:50,226 --> 01:34:51,352
- You're the executive producer.

2427
01:34:51,352 --> 01:34:53,729
- Yeah. That's what I do.

2428
01:34:53,729 --> 01:34:55,022
- I'll tell you what.

2429
01:34:55,022 --> 01:34:58,859
You tell Shit, come by my office
first thing Monday morning.

2430
01:34:58,859 --> 01:35:01,946
I'm an AandR man. This is diggity dope.

2431
01:35:03,447 --> 01:35:06,826
♪ Splurge with soldier
cost the whole world ♪

2432
01:35:06,826 --> 01:35:08,953
♪ Now bending over, wild baloney ♪

2433
01:35:08,953 --> 01:35:10,454
♪ Go and get 'em, superstar ♪

2434
01:35:10,454 --> 01:35:11,706
♪ High neck ♪

2435
01:35:11,706 --> 01:35:16,711
♪ I do the drag while the
DJ running and trigger man ♪

2436
01:35:17,795 --> 01:35:19,463
♪ She a rhythm, man ♪

2437
01:35:19,463 --> 01:35:20,798
♪ Hardcore thriller, man ♪

2438
01:35:20,798 --> 01:35:23,634
♪ Gave a nigga hair still
laying on the pillow, man ♪

2439
01:35:23,634 --> 01:35:25,302
♪ And I know it's just a dance ♪

2440
01:35:25,302 --> 01:35:26,721
♪ What was underneath the pants ♪

2441
01:35:26,721 --> 01:35:28,931
♪ Got a nigga in a trance, understand ♪

2442
01:35:28,931 --> 01:35:31,976
♪ Look I love that when you
hit the flow like that ♪

2443
01:35:31,976 --> 01:35:34,937
♪ When you drop it down low like that ♪

2444
01:35:34,937 --> 01:35:37,690
♪ And when you lick it up slow like that ♪

2445
01:35:37,690 --> 01:35:40,484
♪ Turn around and make
it just roll like that ♪

2446
01:35:40,484 --> 01:35:44,780
♪ Do what you do, yeah,
do what you do, yeah ♪

2447
01:35:44,780 --> 01:35:46,240
♪ Do what you do, girl ♪

2448
01:35:46,240 --> 01:35:47,450
♪ Do what you do, yeah ♪

2449
01:35:47,450 --> 01:35:49,285
♪ Do what you do, yeah ♪

2450
01:35:49,285 --> 01:35:52,037
♪ Do what you do when no stop ♪

2451
01:35:52,037 --> 01:35:54,790
♪ Get it, get it, get it, get it, get it ♪

2452
01:35:54,790 --> 01:35:57,460
♪ Get it, get it, get it,
get it, get it, get it ♪

2453
01:35:57,460 --> 01:36:00,045
♪ Drop it down low, pick it up slow ♪

2454
01:36:00,045 --> 01:36:03,382
♪ Drop it down low, pick it up slow ♪

2455
01:36:03,382 --> 01:36:06,135
♪ Get it, get it, get it,
get it, get it, get it ♪

2456
01:36:06,135 --> 01:36:08,637
♪ Get it, get it, get it,
get it, get it, get it ♪

2457
01:36:08,637 --> 01:36:11,348
♪ Drop it down low, pick it up slow ♪

2458
01:36:11,348 --> 01:36:14,185
♪ Drop it down low, pick it up slow ♪

2459
01:36:14,185 --> 01:36:17,229
♪ Drop it down low, pick it up slow ♪

2460
01:36:17,229 --> 01:36:21,442
♪ Drop it down low and
don't stop with it ♪

2461
01:36:21,442 --> 01:36:24,028
(mellow music)

2462
01:36:31,869 --> 01:36:36,874
♪ This is no time for me to
wear my bulletproof vest ♪

2463
01:36:38,042 --> 01:36:43,005
♪ Lay your body down and get
ready for a fucking fuckfest ♪

2464
01:36:43,088 --> 01:36:48,093
♪ My dick is so hot that
it's nutting your hole ♪

2465
01:36:48,594 --> 01:36:53,557
♪ Squirt my cum on your
mind, your body, your soul ♪

2466
01:36:53,557 --> 01:36:58,562
♪ I just took a shower
and I don't got no gas ♪

2467
01:36:59,438 --> 01:37:04,443
♪ Come on the end and put
your tongue up in that ass ♪

2468
01:37:04,568 --> 01:37:09,573
♪ I ain't on the rag,
and this morning I do ♪

2469
01:37:09,782 --> 01:37:14,787
♪ So come on, baby, and put
your tongue up in that puss ♪

2470
01:37:15,412 --> 01:37:20,417
♪ This is no time for you
to be wearing your clothes ♪

2471
01:37:20,709 --> 01:37:23,879
♪ I got foot in mouth ♪
♪ Ew ♪

2472
01:37:23,879 --> 01:37:26,048
♪ My tongue is on your toes ♪

2473
01:37:26,048 --> 01:37:31,053
♪ We can fuck until the
early morning light ♪

2474
01:37:31,303 --> 01:37:36,308
♪ Then go get some food, come
back and fuck all night ♪

2475
01:37:36,684 --> 01:37:38,686
♪ Night ♪

2476
01:37:42,815 --> 01:37:45,401
(lively music)

2477
01:37:54,076 --> 01:37:56,996
(discordant music)

2478
01:38:12,720 --> 01:38:15,139
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪